Trust Break

[LifePF]

Hi Guys,

I am completely broken and feel to cry all the times. I am really depressed and feel no one is here for me. I love my husband from core of my heart and we are married from last 14 years...we have lots of ups and downs but I always tried to be there for him and accepted him, thinking one day he will fall in love with me but it never happened.  For him, his family is his first priority and he can even beat me if I raise any concerns. He support them by all means...transfer alot of money to his brother and never tell me. If I ask him anything he hides and denied like he never did anything for them. He does send money to his mum...which I believe is OK as she is his mom but still he never mentioned me any thing. Even some time he has to, he will tell me when already he sent some gifts but that too very occasionally. 

I feel bad as he behaves like I am not part of his family ...and he keeps on manipulating things and argue will me if I ask him anything 

Sometimes I think I maybe wrong if he is not telling me anything but I really feel bad if he has done something but lies to me ...

Please please please...I beg ...need advise if I am overthinking ...I am getting broken and feel to cry as I love him unconditionally and he don't feel to share his things with me...I am really hurt with all these and now can't control my self...feel like I am a useless person in his life...

[Sophie_M]

Hi LifePF, 
 
Thank you so much for your openness and strength in sharing this here. It sounds like there is a lot going on, and we’re really glad you could reach out to the forums. We have also sent you a private message to check in with you and I'm sure our lovely community here will offer you some amazing advice and help.
 
We’d recommend reaching out to 1800RESPECT to get support with this. You can contact them on 1800 737 732 and they also have webchat here. They are experts in supporting people who are experiencing family violence and will listen in a kind, understanding and non-judgmental way. It sounds like it's really having an impact on how you're feeling day to day, so please know that there’s always someone here for you to talk it through with. The Beyond Blue counsellors are available 24/7 on 1300 22 4636 or online, here.    We’re sure we’ll hear from our lovely, supportive community soon. In the meantime, here’s a few things you might like to look at: 

• 1800 RESPECT’s advice on safety planning: thinking about things you can do to be safer while you’re there and if you plan to leave.  
• It's really important to be kind to yourself through this, so there's some tips for practicing self-care here. 

We are here to support you and you are not alone. Thank you so much for sharing here. Please feel free to share a bit more and let us know what is going on for you, and what might help, if you feel comfortable.  

Kind regards,  

Sophie M 

[jaz28]

Hi there,

I am sorry you are going through this. You do not deserve it at all. It is terrible! Overthinking is unfortunately quite natural but I agree it is very exhausting. You also do not deserve to be treated like you are nothing because you are so much more than that. Have you had an honest conversation with your husband?

Another option to try is couples counselling if he is open to it, or seek professional help for yourself. You can start by seeing your GP.

I am so sorry this has happened and I hope you are okay. Please reach out again if you need more support.

Jaz xx