relationship breakup with bipolar girlfriend

[confused68]

Hi guys.im new to this and am hoping to get some encouraging advice from those who have been through something similar.my girlfriend who has bipolar started dating april last year.All was going great and she told me about her condition straight up.Before long i met her kids 2 teenagers and her 5 year old twin girls and also her mum,dad,brother and one sister.Everything was going great,we were even going to get engaged.Things were getting serious,maybe a little too quickly.Anyway one night we arranged to meet at the pub but i decided to show up at her place and surprise her with a lift but she got really angry at me.i calmed her down and met her later at the pub but she up and left without me knowing(panic attack maybe)From this night on i noticed her moods had changed and she didnt seem to want to spend time together and she seemed to even have this aggression in her eyes.so 2 weeks later i drank with a mate and fell asleep.aAs i slept i missed 2 texts and a phone call from her.I awoke to a nasty breakup text and ended up taking a week stress leave from work.A couple of months after that we had a chat at the pub and talked about having a proper talk about reconciling.I left her but 2 hour later she caught up with me and abused me in a drunken psychotic rage.Since then her father has passed away and i have sent her the odd text and she has responded in a non aggressive way.I have most of her family on facebook and i know they really like me.I love this woman so intensely and want to contact her to have a face to face chat to reconcile.Could this work.Has anybody out there had a similar situation.I suspect she feels the same but she is very stubborn and i think i should be the one to make the move,but with the bipolar its hard to know what mood she is in.I have done a lot of research so i know what she is going through out of love and respect for her.Any advice would be much appreciated.im hoping to get encouragement.Thanks so much.

[Guest_1584]

Eh confused.

Mine's def' done but , in the long run that's best l think for lots of reasons , so l'm trying to tell myself that . But yeah , you talked to your sister shrink while l sort of had an accidental of sorts , psychic reading but she agrees it's done. The good news is though she sees good things for me so at least that's something.

But yeah , we all get caught up in fights and defensive striking out sometimes and say stupid things, l doubt she meant it or you either, The friend sounds like a piece of work really though does it matter whatever he is , your main concern is the ex now . Man l doubt her family would be friendly if she wants you out of her life , you'd think they'd be cagey now if that was the case.

But shyt 8mths , maybe you better do something that's a long time, she might meet someone new if you stay away too long. Me if l really wanted it l'd write the letter or go see her or something and get on with it soon myself.

Worst she can do is tell you where to go , right.

Keep us informed yeah , good luck.

[confused68]

Hey random. I finally wrote pam the letter. I was very apologetic for my actions and explained how old mate was behaving towards me and manipulating people. I didnt put everything but i told her she was welcome to come around anytime and ill explain the rest. I guess its a waiting game now. Hopefully she doesnt throw it out or send it back. Im sure if she reads it that it will have a positive impact. Now im nervous as wondering if i did the right thing. Anyway mate ill keep you posted. Apparently women really like hand written letters. All the best. Confused

[Guest_1584]

Haha yep they do l can vouch for that.

Great stuff glad you got it out there anyway mate , sounds good the way you said it all. Nothing to lose at this stage it'll either make you guys or not, right.

Good luck.

[confused68]

Cheers random.I know this has been an ongoing thing but its good to have some one to talk to.The letter should have got there by now but i have heard nothing which is i reckon a good thing,no nasty text or note in the letter box.I know with pam it takes a bit for things to sink in depending on her frame of mind or mood.I just hope she read the letter,i think she would have as curiosity is a major trait in humans.I do have a good feeling about it actually and i think she could pop up at any stage like she did a while ago,i mean she shows up 8 months after the breakup which to me says she wants us back.She did say we were soul mates when we were together and to me that is huge for a woman to say that.Anyway i cant do anything more than to wait and get on with things but i have this nagging feeling this isnt the end.Thanks for listening random and have a great weekend Confused

[Guest_1584]

Ahh, no worries confused , rant away if it helps mate mine was 5x more don't worry buttt, got it figured in the end.

Yeah think she'd read it for sure and think about it all for awhile.

Haha feelings are usually right mate well mine are anyway soooo , see what happens . She'll probly need some more time first though.

Good luck

rx

[confused68]

Hey random what's doing mate. Still no word from pam but I think that's a good thing. I agree with what you said in that she probably needs some time to think about my letter. I still have her family on my facebook and accessed her page from another account. There is still a couple of pics of us in her photo gallery which I think is a good thing. I'm gonna hang back and be patient. I heard from my brother through a mutual person my ex mate is blaming pam for that incident that night. What a piece of work. She did post on facebook a couple of weeks ago how low and useless she feels and she was having a bad day, I'm not sure if I'm part of that or if it's just the bipolar/depression talking. At least she didn't send my letter back or no nasty txt(assuming she didn't delete my number)i think you're right though, she would of read it. Take care random and will chat soon. Confused

[Guest_1584]

Hey confused.

eh, what a bonus bonus the mate went round saying that if that gets back to her she'll really see his true colors then and you'll be off the hook.

Have a nice wkend mate cheers

rx

[confused68]

Hey random. Hows things man? I thought I'd run something by you. I was gonna send pan a follow up letter as I read online that a second apology a while after the first can seem really sincere. Apparently people are more forgiving after a second letter. I just don't wanna cross the line or seem as though I'm harassing. People tend to send the first letter cause they feel they have to but a second can really do the trick apparently. I'm not gonna mention old mate but focus on my actions and how sorry I am and also compliment her. Anyway just wanted to get your opinion. Cheers random and have a good one. Confused.

[Guest_1584]

Heya confused.

Welll , now this is just me right , whenever l hear or talk to anyone these days about this sorta stuff l just think of how gf and l were and how we did things.

So hell yeah , l'd send her another one now , good timing , mind you we would've been back on a day or two after the first one or def' working up to it but eh , we were two Ferrari's neither of us liked effg around haha.

So l'd say yeah go for it , or l would've anyway., which l did, a few time haha. Short and sweet, just to show your real about this and your still thinking about her. Mine , she liked a little follow up it help her know l was legit and l meant it,.and break the ice.

Good luck mate.

[confused68]

Hey random.Hope all is good with you mate.Hey i decided not to send the second apology letter to pam as i think i should let her get her head around things.With pam this seems to take a while and im hoping the old absense makes the heart grow fonder thing will work,but i think if she read the letter she will want to know the whole story(hopefully). Anyway this clown approached one of my mates to try to run me down but my mate walked off on him and a lady friend of mine saw him at the local rsl and from her texts i think she gave him a spray about what he has done to me,plus she is warning the old locals at the rsl what he is like.I just had my birthday last saturday and pams sister sent me a message through facebook and her brother liked it so that tells me pam hasnt run me down to them which i think is a good thing. I did see the moron on monday when i took my statesman for a drive and he just kept staring at the car with a stern look on his face.I have a feeling if pam read the letter and he contacted her she may have told him where to go (thats what im hoping anyway).Anyway mate im hoping for some good karma.this old bloke i work with was right twice as he said he sounds like bad news,get rid of him and that i would hear from her again.He also thinks i will hear from her again even after what happened and i tend to agree,might just take time. Cheers mate all the best and hope you are doing ok. Confused