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I lost everything

Community Member

I am 30, and this time last year I was planning my wedding to my beau of 11 years, with our beautiful dog and house, and just started my dream job!

But the sadness and grief I felt almost every other day was unbearable, and my ex-fiance is a chef so he was never around. So, when I started my new job a man took a liking to me and little did I realise that I ended up having an emotional affair, which has now lead me to losing my fiance, my dog, the house, and I am now renting with a friend, with all that is keeping me sane is my job.

When my ex and I broke up the man and I started seeing each other but that didn't end well for either of us. After we broke up, I started seeing someone different, and he is amazing and treats me like an absolute lady and princess but I'm still not happy. Maybe it's too soon? I've literally had no rest between men, and every day I am feeling exhausted and uncertain of who I am and where I am going.

I am still trying to make sense of everything... I have seen professionals, energy workers, psychics, as well as read up on the "Return to Saturn" to try and give me clarity.

Please help me. Please give me advice. I don't know what to do. Feeling hopeless.

7 Replies 7

Community Member
Hey, it's difficult when you're dealing with anxiety and feeling a need for acceptance, to remember that you can only engage fully in a relationship when you know who you are and accept yourself for who you are...can I recommend taking some time out to discover yourself...best of luck!💕

Blue Voices Member
Blue Voices Member
Oh hunny im sorry to hear this i understand how devastating this is for you.  Things always happen for a reason in life they don't just happen this goes for the people we meet as well. Its sounds to me ur in need to some self discovery.  This is something that takes a lot of time but once achieved you will feel so much better about yourself and believe me u will gain a inner strength to conquer the world.  Ask for gods help thanks to him and taking quiet time sitting alone at a park or a beach is the perfect setting for self discovery. I know it c works bc its worked for me and even till this day i still have alone time to find myself. Your body and ur mind will love you for it. Also sounds like this new man in ur life is a positive step for you have faith in yourself tell urself u can do this i know u can rediscover urself it just takes time and a positive belief and you will c beautiful things will happen for you.  😊  everything and everyone in life happens for a reason whether it be a blessing or a teaching things just don't happen out of no where.  And when this happens god is guiding you be open to him embrace him don't be afraid to ask for his help bc he will gladly take you under his wing and protect u always.  Hope this has helped here if u need to chat xx 

Community Member
Sometimes i wonder why things happen to in life, your alive and breathing no matter what happens. Big crisis is in life, most of us have had them, and just have to try to cope best we can..i hope life takes a nice turn for you.

Hi Bubbles1973,

Thank you for taking the time to reply to me, and give me advice. I know you are right about taking time out to discover myself but I am scared. I broke up with the new guy, and two days later I was panicking and back in his arms. I wish I was reliant on me, and me only. Deep down that is what I want but I just lack confidence.

Hi Fairwings,

Thank you so much for your beautiful words of wisdom - literally brought tears to my eyes. I want you to know that I did take some time out at a beach for a few hours and was perfect - I felt so at peace, and will make it a priority to do it more often. This new man has given me faith but I think part of my anxiety with him is that I know I don't see a future - there's no connection - I just don't know how to tell him that, and stick to my decision instead of running back scared.

That aside, just wanted to say thank you again for your advice x

Hi Scotty2013,

Thank you for taking time out to reply, and wish we well. I have started a wellbeing course with MindSpot (via Beyond Blue) so here's to hoping that it will provide me with skills to cope.

Hi beautiful im so glad i was able to help anytime sweety and im so glad u got to have quiet time so important 😍😍 with this new man of yours don't be afraid just talk to him honestly and explain to him that you have had the chance to think things thru and you don't c the relationship working out bc u don't have that deep connection. He may try to side track you but a relationship needs to work both ways if u don't feel that connection then i would just let him know whichever is more comfortable for you.  Politely stand ur ground u can do this hun ill be thinking of you let me know how uv . Venessa xxoo