I am just wanting to share my story, wondering if anyone else has gone through something similar.

[Ollie]

I have been in a very toxic relationship for three years. I have two children from a previous marriage. I met this gorgeous guys who was extremely good looking and had a high paying job, and was a father himself. The relationship dynamic was always he making promises, extravagant promises. Providing proof. Eg, booked a holiday fore to come over seas to visit him while he was away for work, then cancelled the trip two days before I was due to fly.  He did this with so many things, countless holidays, cancelled me moving in twice with him. Everything was always done in the most humiliating way. He never made and effort to meet friends or family and well it was just toxic. When we would break up he'd come crying, begging me to take him back for months on end. 

This cycle continued to happen and I stupidly would get sucked back into the cycle. We went to councling and he had been the perfect partner, for 6 months. Everything was like a dream.  What I'd always wanted. 

Unfortunately I lost my job and lost a family member, all these things around me started to fall apart and he was right by my side. He suggested we move in together, take the pressure off, give me time to heal and find another job. I agreed at a vulnerable time to do this. He ensured that we get rid of all of my furniture and that we just didn't need it, as all his belongings were new and nice and my things were, well daggy. 

I trusted him and agreed, with in one week of me handing over my long term ( cheap) rental, the arguing began and the old colours began to show. The abuse started, the nasty comments, snapping at me, talking down and using control. We had a disagreement over me being quiet, as I was hurt from the true colours starting to come to the surface, he then said get out, you need to leave. He broke things off and has asked me to vacate the property, I have no job, no income and literally no where to go. I have managed to secure some government payments but is not enough to qualify for another rental. I have zero savings and no belongings at all besides my childrens furniture we brought with us. I am petrified, shocked and can not believe I ended up in this situation. I feel so stupid for falling for this abusers abuse and traps again. But this time he got me when I was going through a really hard time and I guess vulnerable. I still can not believe I put myself in this position and I'm so angry I allowed this to happen to me. I feel so scared and there's just no where to turn. Is this abuse? Do people really do this to other people? I just can't understand it? How I let myself fall into this cycle with him again and let my guards down to be a target. I always considered myself to be smart and I'm struggling with the humiliation and hating myself. Has this happened to anyone else? 

[randomxx]

Sorry to say op or put it like this but l think it's best said for the future.

ls there family or someone that could help for awhile bide some time? or bc you have kids l know a friend of my daughter ended u in basically the same situation as yourself and got put straight into gov housing, l'm talking within a few days, and it's a beautiful place , furnished the lot, and she can keep it forever.

She got it through St Vinnies and Center link.

[Ollie]

I have been every where for support. I've called all the emergency housing places and asked centerlink and reached out to some churches and I just haven't had any directions. I have just been told they might place me in motels but that's so unsettling and not a safe option. We have some pets to. There's no family or friends, want where I can go. I'm just beside myself