Financial manipulation adult son

BethD
Community Member

Hi, I have just blocked all contact with my 35-year-old son who for quite some time has been (don't want to call it financially abusing because I have willingly given him the money) but manipulating, guilting, for want of better words and I am now feeling extremely guilty and heartbroken for having done this and want to know if anyone else has done similar and how they have overcome the guilt, grief of losing their child.

 

26 Replies 26

BethD
Community Member

Hi it’s me again. I just wanted to hear if any other parent had cut their child off and how they’ve coped. I have blocked my son for three weeks due to financial manipulation and feel heartbroken and guilty and every other feeling and can’t seem to move on. Any thoughts advice strategies would be greatly welcomed and appreciated. 

white knight
Community Champion

Hi Beth

 

Financial manipulation, unlike other family disputes, has a clear red line. Your son has clearly drained you for money and doesnt comply to boundaries. We are not dealing with opinions apart from his chosen opinions designed to create guilt.

 

Therefore your stance should be solid and to do that you need to eliminate emotion from the problem.

 

You're no longer a bank, he can go to lending institutions, he can go bankrupt, he can - do it tough... many people do.

 

In the meantime fill every day with your activities and meet good people.

 

TonyWK 

BethD
Community Member

Hi, I just wanted to know if anyone else had experienced withdrawal symptoms  and how they felt and secondly I decided to ring my son whom I had blocked and got no response from both his personal and work phone. Do I just leave it? 

 

 

Hello  BethD,

 

 

Reaching out to your son after blocking him takes real emotional effort, and the silence back is hard to sit with. Knowing whether to try again or leave things for now is one of those questions only you can answer, and there is no wrong answer.

Pristiq withdrawal affects people differently, and hearing others share their experiences can help make sense of what your body and mind are going through. Others here have walked that path and may have something useful to offer.

Holding you in my thoughts today.

 

BethD
Community Member

Hi all, I just wanted to know if anyone has gone through mediation withdrawal or reduction and coped with the side effects. 

Dear BethD~

Welcome back, I have read your other threads. The first thing to say is that everyone is different, and reactions to medications can therefore be different too.

 

When first going on some medications htey have unexpected side effects htat at not there when the body becomes used to  hte medication. At that point they may have different ones. Tailing off a medication can have its problems too, either because the original illness not being treated, or adverse reactions to the drug withdrawal.

 

I have had to try out very many medications to tret my sonditiobs which include PTSD, depression bouts and anxiety. Sometimes hte changeover can be easy and at other times it had had physical and metal effects. One I particularly remember was becoming hopeless and wanting to  end my life, another was being dangerously overconfident and acting without thinking thigs though.

 

Fortunately I was in constant contact with my psychiatrist, who was the one issuing the  scripts, and he was very flexibly in trying new medications when the old ones were not working or had unmanageable side effects. Eventually we found the correct treatment and it has made a world of difference.

 

Can I suggest you keep in very close contact with your prescriber and explain what you are going though. there may be alternatives to ease things.

 

If you would like to let us know how you get on that would be great.

 

Croix

 

 

 

I’m going through this currently. I reduced my medication a couple of weeks ago and thought I was going pretty well. I found I was a bit clumsier, that I cried more often (not hysterically, just a few tears at things that I wouldn’t usually cry about) and I had a little bit less patience (I snapped at my partner a couple of times) I’m not a snappy person and so I didn’t like that last one at all and decided to put the dose back to its normal amount. That’s when it got hard. It’s only been 3 days and I have felt like I was on a different planet. I’m struggled with anxiety, emotions, I can’t even think clearly.

 

I wish I hadn’t have messed with them in the first place. But I would say that if you’re struggling with the reduction, be super honest about the symptoms with the people around you, and make sure you have support. It’s really hard dealing with it alone.

 

Good luck - I hope you get the best outcome