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faceing home

kanga_brumby
Blue Voices Member
Blue Voices Member
The story so far I met my missus in80s lost contact then found her again by chance. I was living alone the rest of my family all over the state rarely talking to me r talking to or with me I was always left out last to find out any news only may be seeing them at Christmas had 2 great kids both disabled my health started failing in 2000 to the point where I am in a old age home surrounded by people with dementia there is talk of sending me back home I cannot walk far arthritis both knees no wheel chair my kids to young to care for me family who don’t care a banana I wish to go home but now to scared to because I will be alone I hate being alone loneliness is everything it’s cracked up to be there isn’t much worse i cannot move into a boarding house because either the owner/ manager or residents rip you off plus there full of junkies and drunks I am scared of loneliness I have been there before about 15 years in a flat by myself I am not a loner it’s the nights no one to talk to argue make up with.
This Rant was brought to you by Kanga
14 Replies 14

geoff
Champion Alumni
Champion Alumni
hi Kanga, moving back home was your dream, rather than being in an old age home, to get away from all those people who never paid any attention to what you've said, denying you what you wanted and truly hating it so much.
Now you are at home get yourself a cat, probably better than a dog because you won't be able to walk with it, log into facebook, although some people don't like it, but why not, start talking to them on Skype, get the council cleaner to come every week, get meals on wheels, I know someone who has this and he happily talks with them all the time.
Learn a course online, whatever you want that would entail hours of work.
Order your groceries online someone will deliver them, your friend Paul will come along and mention other things and I hope others also do the same. Geoff.

kanga_brumby
Blue Voices Member
Blue Voices Member
Geoff I have Skype I am on Facebook It is still the night the loneliness in here I get avoided yatta yatta Ido need out fear of being alone I am a people person I crave contact with people animals when pets need us me is a dogie person I still need to be able at night to see or know someone is close

kanga_brumby
Blue Voices Member
Blue Voices Member
I do have Skype no one contacts me i try no reply I face book no joy there I prefer face to face contact

Thanks Kanga, maybe get a dog that doesn't need any exercise, unless you have a backyard. Geoff.

CMF
Blue Voices Member
Blue Voices Member

Hey Kanga,

i really like Geoff's suggestions of meals on wheels and someone cleaning because they do provide company/contact during the day. The lady who cleaned my dads house would sit and have a cuppa with him, he alwYs mDe sure he had her favourite biscuits. The nights are hard, I know. I play games on my iPad or hope there is a good movie to pass the time. I think you ,entioned once you've had issues with your local council but I think they have services where someone visits during the day and can spend time or take you out. Pretty sure my dad was offered that.

youve mentioned 2 children, I thought you had more? Sorry to hear they are both disabled. Are they the 2 with learning difficulties/autism? Where are they at the moment.

wish I could help more. You know we are here in the cafe for a chat at night.

cmf x

White_Rose
Champion Alumni
Champion Alumni

Hello Kanga

It's sad when you are about to get what you have wanted for some time to wonder if it's really what you want. It seems to me that most of this situation is related to living where you do. I do some volunteering with people who have dementia in some form or other and who are at different stages of this illness. These people have daytime respite care from about 9:00am to 2:30 pm. They picked up from home and return the same way. They are able to talk to each other and generally socialise. I know it's not night-time but it does provide a social opportunity.

I also visit people in their homes and stay for one to two hours. Again day-time I know but if the person wants to go somewhere for a short time I can get a car from the organisation to go out. It may be that other organisations can arrange for evening visits.

You may find you would prefer to live in an aged care facility. In this case you can choose a place you would like. Some of the stories you have written sound horrendous and no doubt put you off returning to a similar place. Once home you can be an active partner looking for a suitable residence which is the only successful way of meeting your needs.

I hesitate to suggest organisations to discuss this matter as I don't know you very well. Perhaps you can talk to some of the church-based services. Other organisations also have these services. Perhaps you can spend some of your computer time researching other places to live.

Of course household services are available but I think you know about these.

So may I suggest you get on the computer and start designing the assistance you would like. In the various options from different organisations you may a combination that suits you. With NDIS you can get services from several organisations at the same time, just choose what you want. Because of the changes in the way the money pool is used organisations are very keen to be your provider so you have control over what happens.

Good luck with the research.

Mary

Ggrand
Community Champion
Community Champion

Hi Kangaroo.

I really am sorry you are struggling at the moment. You are one awesome person.

Don't know if I can be of any help but this is what I'm doing . I have been on my own now for 4 long years.

I can relate to the part of nighttime loneliness so well. I can go days at a time without even sighting anyone I live in a really small town and in the last back street where not even cars go by through the day..

First couple of years cried myself to sleep. What I do now is i bought this mobile phone and I joined Facebook. I wasn't interested in that so I searched youtube on this phone

I searched full length movies. There is hundreds of them dating back to when tv first came out..I can pick n choose what I feel like watching.

I must admit that the last 2 months or so I have been watching and listening to motivational videos and meditation videos as suggested by these wonderful people here on bb. To try and heal my broken mind.

Also you can put apps on your phone or computer where you can play scrabble, checkers, chess etc. with anyone from around the world which also has a chat line so you can also talk while playing. ( I haven't done this for a while as too much has been happening in my life atm).

Books are another thing there are thousands of to read free. I am not a reader so this for me didn't work but if you like reading this will be good also.

I used to look at the night for all the hours in it but in actual fact it's around 6 hours to get through and if sleep comes to me quick enough well the morning arrives..

Not sure if i am of any help Kanga but I thought I would just let you know what I try to do.

Some nights yeah nothing works for me, but other nights do .

Karen.

kanga_brumby
Blue Voices Member
Blue Voices Member

Still cannot shake this feeling of dread trying to climb stairs to my home afraid of falling. Now panicking over the hole deal yet I need it to get out of where I am devil and deep blue sea I still want freedom

i of mobility with out this assessment I wont get it ever. Being locked up in here is killing me spiritually and and mentally I am loosing my facilities because I am not using them in here I cannot pass on to the next generation what they need to know.to survive in this world.

Kanga

Well that's torn it a hole new hole. On Monday Morning I have to go home to show the person me home stairs and all me with a gammy leg still.