Hello Jackson,
Ive seen you around the forums but don't know your story.
I had parents both mum &a dad who were both physically and mentally abusive towards me growing up. I eloped at 18 and never saw or spoke to them for over 40 years.
My father passed away, I never went to his funeral, even though he was abusive towards me he was still my dad and the guilt I felt not attending his funeral will always hang around me.
Mum contacted me around 5 years ago and wanted to meet me for a coffee. I was hesitant and decided to ring her first and speak to her to see if she was genuine or not. After my initial phone call mum called back on a weekly basis, I started to get to know her. It took me nearly 8 months of phone calls to agree to meet her.
We met at her home, it was a very strange meeting both of us were uncomfortable and the meeting only lasted 15 minutes, a few more phone calls and we met again, this time was better then the last time.
We continued to meet on a monthly basis, I got to know her again but not as the mum I remembered but as a different mum, she had changed. 2 years after the first meeting she died, I went to her funeral and mourned a mother that I knew for only 5 years.
Its a hard decision you are trying to decide, maybe phone contact first for a few months, just to get to know him and see if he genuinely wants to reconcile with you.
Not sure if this helped or not.
I hope you can make the right decision, it won't be an easy one to make. but please look after you first..your important.
kind thoughts GG.
