What do I do now

[Loosing_faith]

Hi all,

I’m not sure this is the right topic group but here goes.

Ive had diagnosed anxiety and depression for over a decade and 2 years ago I moved to rural NSW to start my dream job which I’m exceptionally good at.

I’m 8 weeks post a major operation and have just been cleared to work part time but come Friday I get an email saying I’ve been accused of various things at work and have to have a meeting about this. I’ve called the Union for assistance.

My A&D has gone through the roof, I feel like I’m a total burden on my family as it is and also feel that I’m being railroaded by my workplace ( which is very toxic as it is ) 

I now feel that even if I win to prove my innocence that I’m in a loosing situation.

i think I need to see someone professional about this and pretty soon to get the A&D under a bit of control before my mind explodes as it cannot turn it off.

[Fiatlux]

Hi Loosing_faith,

I hope you well today all things considered.

I spent 7+ years working at toxic workplaces. As I was a contractor I worked between 2 sites and occasionally a 3rd site and I was damn good and thorough as well as being a good role model for others at these workplaces. Clients definitely praised and appreciated me. Something that was possibly annoying to some colleagues. Needless to say that I outlasted everyone, even my General Manager who hired me for my role. Toxic workplaces tended to have a higher staff turnover. As a contractor I had to be far better at my job or I would be let go at anytime.

You are entitled to have a support person as well as a union delegate attend the meetings with you. Don’t go to this meeting alone. Take someone you trust.

Not knowing what you have supposedly done wrong can be very stressful. You may possibly feel that your workplace has conspired against you during your leave. Accusing you of wrongdoing especially via email must have you baffled.

As an employer myself I was responsible for hiring, training and supervision of staff in my area. At one time I had a middle manager who I was to report to. This person was impossible to get along with and felt threatened by anyone new who outshone him. Before he was eventually dismissed and made redundant he made life difficult for me and my staff. He pushed good people to give up and leave which reflected badly on me or he would fabricate errors, such as $5 going missing from petty cash, which he took himself. It was silly petty behaviour like that which led to him being made redundant soon after this stunt.

If you are a member of a Union they may be able to refer you to a mental health professional or at least point you in the right direction. It may be true that even if you prove that you have done none of the things that you have been accused of, things at the work site can feel intense. You may even consider extending your leave until you have cleared your name.

Apart from the $5 incident, I have never been accused of serious misconduct but I did have a few people in middle management who quite deliberately tried to set me up for failure. As I am a stickler for double checking my work and checking others work, I kept a step ahead of mischief makers. 

The timing of this is really terrible for you but try to stay positive. Maybe start writing down your thoughts and responses to the accusations. Only recently I had to write a response to someone over a workplace injury involving another employee and although the incident occurred 10 years ago, I found that the more I thought about it while searching for documentation, the more I remembered about the incident. It was a relief that my memory didn’t fail me.

You are still vulnerable following your surgery and you may need more time to provide your thorough response. Maybe request an extension and postpone your meeting until you have had time to think deeply about the situation. It will definitely be less stressful when you are confident that you can prove yourself innocent. Stay strong and calm.

Wishing you all the best. Fiatlux 🙏🏼