Losing my mind (trigger warning: child sexual abuse)

[Daz06]

Im losing my mind, my anxiety has gone to a whole new level, cant think straight, forgetting things names times places, just sad withdrawn cant see the way forward or dont want to go forward, can't see a way forward. 4 year's ago we witness our then 4 year old boy being sexually assulted, I went into severe depression, i made a monumental mistake at work which led to a criminal conviction, we lost our house and savings because I was not strong enough to cope, now we have to go to Brisbane for mediation to resolve my sons pending court case, this has reignited severe depression &severe anxiety im just not coping i can feel myself withdrawing more each day, knowing that I have to face all the details of this horrible situation.

[Doolhof]

Hi Daz06,

Usually I start off a post with what I hope is a cheery "welcome to Beyond Blue and to the community here", from your post it seems like that welcome might be a bit inappropriate.

Yourself and your family have certainly been through quite an horrendous ordeal.

If I may ask a few questions: Do you see a Dr or a psychologist about all that has been happening?

Do you have supportive family and friends?

Is there any support available through the court system or even the Police to help you deal with this?

Do you have a lawyer, can they recommend places where you can receive help and support?

Have you ever used the phone help lines, like the one here at Beyond Blue on 1300 22 4636 or Lifeline. The people answering the phones will be able to point you in the direction of help and listen to what you are saying.

Have you tried writing out all of your thoughts and emotions? You don't have to keep what you have written, you can tear it up, throw it away , for some people that helps to relieve their anxiety and stress a little.

I suggest you see your Dr. Make phone calls and see who can help you right now. Look in the Government listings in the phone book, there may be some kind of support in your area.

I hope some of this helps! Don't know what else to suggest.

From Mrs. Dools

[Starwolf]

Hello Daz,

My oh my, Life has dealt you a tough hand to play...my heart goes out to you.

We all make mistakes, particularly when stress clouds our judgment. It is unfortunately the way we humans learn. So nothing wrong with stuffing up, as long as we don't go there again. A learned lesson means something positive has been achieved.

However, it still leaves us to deal with the consequences our mistakes have caused. But big problems can be overcome if broken into small pieces and dealt with one at a time. Sometimes we must start again from scratch and build up from there. Quite a few of us here at BB are familiar with this challenging journey.

I agree with Mrs Dools...you don't have to go through this alone. Support is available. Accessing it is a priority.

So is looking after yourself as it will help you gain the strength to see this through. Depression makes dealing with difficulties a lot harder. With the right help and support, it can get better. Having to re-live traumatic episodes puts us under enormous pressure. You will need assistance to help you carry this burden. You definitely ought to call the hotline, a good place to start, reach out and find out what is the best next step.

Your son is young and vulnerable. Hats off to you for seeking justice and going through this painful process on his behalf.

My best wishes are with you both.