Left an abusive relationship! Finally!

[GemAndLogan]

Hey guys,

I finally got the strength to leave a 9 year abusive relationship. I have never felt lighter! I am free!

My relationship with my partner was physically and mentally abusive. He called me names, he pushed me, slapped me and even spat on me a couple of times. He put me in hospital twice. He always put me down, he manipulated me, he lied to me and cheated on me.

Pretty much the relationship from hell and yet I loved him so much (crazy right?)

He is a drug addict and that is what I always blamed for his abusive behavior. I knew what he was doing was wrong but I stayed because I loved him and told myself it was the drugs not him that hurt me.

I have always considered myself a strong, independent person so I hid what my partner did from everyone because I was ashamed of myself for letting him treat me that way, I was embarrassed and angry that it had gone on so long.

After I finally started reaching out to people (starting with my gp) I was so lucky because instead of being judged (which is what I feared) everyone was so understanding and supportive. No one put pressure on me to leave because it was ultimately my decision but they let me know that they were there for me. I wasn't alone.

My partner decided to not come home or answer his phone one weekend and I decided enough was enough, he didn't even respect me enough to answer my phone call yet we'd been together so long?! I knew then and there that it was never going to get better so I packed my stuff and my pets, cried a lot and then moved out. I have not shed a single tear since.

I wanted to share this because it was so so so so hard for me to leave, the hardest thing I've ever done. But it was the best thing I've ever done for myself. I didn't even realise that the relationship was consuming me and not in a good way. I thought about the things my partner did to me 24/7 and now I never think about that because I know it's over and will never happen to me again.

If anyone else feels trapped in an abusive relationship please know that it only takes 5 minutes of courage to take that first step and tell someone. Tell a friend, a family member, your GP or any health care professional, reach out on this forum or send BB an email.

You deserve to be respected, you deserve to be valued and you deserve to be happy! You can do this!

Thanks BB!

[monkey_magic]

Wow, so extremely happy for you. That's really great news. Thankyou so much for being generous enough to share to give others hope and inspiration! 🙂

[Lonelydan]

Hi gen&logan, you absolutely did the right thing. I'm so proud of you. What strength you have to leave such a dead end relationship. Dan.

[geoff]

hello GemAndLogan, thanks for believing in us and telling your story, it will help other people in a similar situation.
It takes a great deal of courage to make this decision, because you could always be hoping that everything could change, and this is why you stayed with him, HOPE, unfortunately with a person like your partner it would require an enormous shift in attitude and respect, something he certainly was not interested in doing or even contemplating because he wanted to be number one.
It's believing that you're brave, strong and and finally determined to start enjoying your life, at last, it's something that you needed to make a decision, and well done, you'll now have more fun with your pets. Geoff.

[GemAndLogan]

THANK YOU ALL SO MUCH FOR YOUR BEAUTIFUL,SUPPORTIVE WORDS : )

xoxoxox

[luft_]

Hello Gem,

A M A Z I N G!

That is such great news and I wish you all the best for your life. There are so many exciting things to come and experiences to enjoy.

I am sure you feel free as a bird now - the world is your oyster.

X

[MarkJT]

GemandLogan, outstanding! Very happy for you. Now you can use that negative experience, turn it into a positive and get on with your life and excel at it.

One hell of a tough and resilient woman you are!

Mark.

[Natalia123]

Thank you for sharing I too want to share.

I am currently in a relationship and married to my husband we have no kids. The relationships has been a tornado. It’s off and on, sometimes his in other times he’s off.

He abandons me regularly he has cheated on me while apart and he uses alcohol. There are aspects of me that love him but her can not give me an emotional connection and when he hits the bottle it becomes even harder for him to open up.

[Elsam]

Wish i was strong and had the courage to run away.

i am so over trying and being manipulated by a Narcissist!

[geoff]

Hello Elsam, we can help you have the courage to do this, so please get back to us.

Geoff.