Chronic Complex PTSD/Borderline Personality Disorder Alcohol and Drug addiction

[RogerD]

Hi all im in the midst of a major relapse (alcohol) this time.

Usually what happens is I go on a bender and verbally abuse a family member who has wronged me in the past via text. I need to go back into Hospital or at least attend a heap of AA meets Co-Vid 19 has me anxious about doing either so here I am. My BPD behaviour this week has been disgraceful. Tonight I'm craving like mad. I came here hoping I could clear my PTSD/BPD head and stay sober. None of my family wants anything to do with me at the moment (they've had enough). Ive booked into tomorrow nights Smart Recovery Online Meet. I just need to take one day at a time ,just need to get through the weekend till I can see my psychologist on Monday. It seems so far away. If I can stay sober my meds will work.I know alcohol is poison to me and I continue to relapse once my emotions get the better of me. Anyways lets see what happens tomorrow.

[smallwolf]

I am listening to you. And you are right that it is one day at a time. I might not be a person you can call but perhaps you can write here? Are there things that can do that will help keep you busy and your mind off the alcohol?

it sounds like you are the trying to the right things with AA and Smart Recovery. One day at a time.

Is there anyone you can talk to as well?

Or perhaps contact Lifeline: 13 11 14 (available 24/7) or Online Crisis Support Chat (available nightly at www.lifeline.org.au)

what triggers your need to drink?

One day at a time.

Tim

[Deckt]

Stay strong, brother. Not sure if you're working the steps. but there's some good stuff in there. You're identifying your behaviour, and you're taking steps. Congratulate yourself on your successes, and try to be gentle on yourself for your shortcomings.

My ex left me - BPD and alcohol addiction. If she were half as aware of her condition as you seem to be, I'd be there to help her. She needs to hit bottom. I know that things are tough with your family, but maybe in time that can change? Something to hope for.