Another day in the life of me

[Midnight01]

So I got told something quite eye opening the other day by my partner, in the midst of talking about exercise I was told this “If you can’t do 1 push up, how will you hold our children”. Now bare in mind this is almost 2 months after losing our daughter 4 days after birth.

He expresses how sorry he is for ever saying it and I don’t hold it against him because he didn’t mean it the way it came out, but unfortunately it’s playing on my mind today and after going to the shops to get him socks and deodorant, I then took myself to the bottle shop and purchased 2 bottles of Wine.

I’ve cried a few times so far today and only eaten porridge at breakfast and just had some watermelon. I feel myself slipping away here and I don’t know what to do. I’ve still yet to go back to work next month and don’t even want to do that.

If anyone can give me any useful information that would be helpful.

[Sophie_M]

Hi Midnight01,

We're so sorry for your loss, and that you had to hear that from your partner. We can imagine it would be hard to cope with this and we’re really glad you were able to reach out here. Please know that there’s no right or wrong way to feel in this situation, grief affects everyone differently. This is a really understanding and welcoming community, and some members will able to relate to what you’re going through, we hope you can feel understood and comforted here. 

Are you connected with any bereavement or mental health support currently? This is obviously an incredibly painful time, and it’s really important you are supported through it. We’d recommend reaching out to an organisation called SANDS, they can offer support and advice to help you and your partner through this. They have 24/7 phone support as well as online support and helpful resources on their website: https://www.sands.org.au/

You can also all the Beyond Blue helpline at any time, on 1300 22 4636, or on webchat (11am-12am AEDT). They can help you talk this through and will also be able to help you plan what's next so that you have that support in place. We know it isn't easy to take that step, but we do want you to know that our counsellors are here for you, 24/7.

We hope you're able to be kind to yourself through this, as you've been so kind in sharing your experience here. Our wonderful community is here to provide you with as much support, advice and conversation as you need.

Kind regards, 

Sophie M 

[romantic_thi3f]

Hi Midnight01,

Welcome and thank you for joining us. I'm so sorry to hear about the loss of your baby.

That sounds like an awful thing to hear; but what's really good is that you've joined us to reach out for support. What sort of support do you have around you-friends/family? Maybe even your employer or their HR?

I'd recommend that you give SANDS a ring. They are all volunteers who have been through grief as well so no judgement and they'll get it. Here's their number if you'd like to try: 1300 308 307.

Try to be kind to yourself.

rt

[quirkywords]

Iam so sorry for the loss of your daughter.
I think talking to someone who has been through a similar loss may help.
I know people who have contacted SANDS and found their support and experience helpful.

There is no right way to grieve and like Sophie and RT be kind yourself and allow yourself to

grieve.