It never gets better

[UnknownGuy]

All my life it has been a struggle, abused as a child, lived on the streets, never known love or been in a relationship but I kept fighting, I started work in hospitality but even that I had to work hard to get where I was and people constantly taken advantage of my generosity but life was going fine then in 2019 I left my job after 11 years with the company I went traveling searching for something to make me happy and make my life meaningful, but after 3 months I returned back to Australia, drifting from one job to another then last year I had a heart attack which led to having a triple bypass after 5 weeks my boss said he prefer if I did not come back (he was concerned it could happen again) so I found another job but my employer was not happy with my work no matter how hard I tried so I returned back home, but I encountered the same problems as before, now nine jobs in 3 years later I am financially broke, about to lose my apartment because I can't afford rent, health is on the decline again and just got advised I now have skin cancer and anxiety as well as my teeth falling out, it's becoming all to hard, I am at the point where I am exhausted mentally from all of this and I often think I am past my due by date, I know I am a good person and my heart is in the right place but I can't talk to anyone about this because there is no one and no one seems to care anyway

[Bob_22]

Hi UnknownGuy,

Thank you for reaching out. It sounds like you've been through so much these last four years and I can feel your exhaustion through your words. Please know, that should you ever need to talk to someone over the phone or through webchat you can also visit our counselling service here: https://www.beyondblue.org.au/mental-health/anxiety/types-of-anxiety/ocd 

Similar to you, though probably not to the same extent, I have also had a difficult couple years. I lost my job in 2020 after four years due to a relapse in my depression. After three years of therapy, ECT and medication however  I was able to find my footing however and slowly work up to where I was before. It took time and alot of hope but I eventually got to where I was wanting through patience and commitment. 

Unfortunately the road to recovery can be long and is never straight forward but reaching out, like you've done, is the first and biggest step. Anxiety can be difficult to manage, but with the right strategies, you can learn to conquer it which hopefully this will assist you at work. I would recommend working with a GP, psychiatrist or mental health professional but if you're looking for some simple anxiety management strategies you can always start here: https://www.beyondblue.org.au/mental-health/anxiety/treatments-for-anxiety/anxiety-management-strate... 

I'm glad that you've acknowledged you are a good person with a good heart. Positive self talk is big part of therapy. While I'm struggling to provide any decent advice on job hunting and looking for work, please know that you can always talk to us and that there are indeed people out there who care.

Bob