I am mmMekitty, named for my cat, (my avatar), who lived 7 years. It has been five or so years since, but I still miss her. Mekitty an I had a simpler relationship than any I have had with people.
The photo is the one I to retrieved after my hard drive crashed. She had wandered off, was away for six days, when she turned up again in the middle of the night. I cried with relief. This was the photo I used for her Lost Cat poster I put up around the neighbourhood at the time.
As for me, I cannot see the detail of the photo nearly as well as I did then, and then my sight was poor. I am now using text-to-speech software, zooming on my pc, voice over. Since I find this stuff difficult, I get really frustrated.
I used to keep all my emotions in check, so much so, I thought and said I did not have any feelings or reactions to anything. That changed and I could not deny the existence of my emotions. It was a terrifying time. What was happening to me? I was falling apart and all this unidentifiable stuff was pouring out.
I have had to learn so much since I began seeing the Psychiatrist I saw back then (1993 - 95). From learning I had to put words to the experiences, name, own, accept them. Still uncomfortable. I beat up on myself too much, I know.
I used to do things I can no longer do to my own satisfaction. I still sing, but not like I used to. I cannot paint like I did. I cannot use pen and paper to write, so have managed to adapt to keyboard. That is something. I have been working on being more sociable, less isolated, but last year, when COVID-19 retrictions required face masks be worn, I found I could not - which is what brings me here.
I have had to curtail so much of what I had been doing. I am feeling the isolation now. How ironic! I resisted even thinking I needed anybody, then I try to have some friends, join a writers' group, get help with things like housework and shopping, going to places for fun and entertainment, only to have to withdraw again because I cannot wear a mask. It bites, like a scorpion.
I will make a thread, now I found the place to click to create one! I think my problem was with how I have my desktop appearance. It looks like any ordinary link, hiding below another, for creating a feed link. Now I know.
I suppose I will get around to talking more about myself. I will need to be careful about how involved I become, so please, don't expect me to pop up everywhere. I would burn out if I did that.
Happy to meet you.
I got so annoyed when I could not sings all the range I used to. That led me into classical. Jazz has been lurking around, getting my attention for decades. I had liked Phoebe Snow, and attempted Cleo Lane .V hard! I wanted to though. But it was Joni Mitchell's album Mingus which really got me in. (Have I said I love her?).
I did enjoy going to the QCGU, at Southbank Brisbane, to hear both classical and jazz performed by students and their teachers. I remember one time, seeing a harpist, how she was leaning back and forth, moving her feet about, with her gown sometimes covering her feet. I thought she must be stepping on the hem. I thought she must be sliding on the seat. I noticed how the harp seemed to be pivoting at the base as she swayed.
When the concert ended, I simply had to ask her about how she was playing the instrument. I learned it had 7 pedals!
Another day, I was going up in the tiny lift, when a man carrying a double bass stepped inside with me. I said "Hi", I suppose. I don't recall. Next thing I know he was playing the first of Bach's Cello Suites. Me tingly for two hours! Seeing better then, I noticed how deeply grooved his fingers were. So much effort; so much beauty.
I do like Elena Katz-Chernin (but I have not got into opera), and Peter Sculthorpe. I would really like more classical/jazz blends.
With my hearing impairment, tinnitus too, I tend to prefer solo or small ensemble now. Wearing my hearing aid, the violins all have bees in them.
I enjoy Diana Doherty - seem to recognise her playing.
My favourite to hear is bass clarinet.
I would love to play piano. My finger get itchy to do it. I have a silly app on my phone...*sigh*
ABC has introduced me to a lot of music.
Oh, these lockdowns ... messing up so many lives. Would that we didn't have to have them. I suppose learning via Zoom is not a viable option?
I never heard of Zoom until March last year.
I wish I could still hold a tune. I liked the community via Zoom choir things which were around last year. That first one was so moving. I'd've got Zoom to be involved in something like that.
As a writer, how do you like the character count? 😼 Too much like a dead-line for me.
Sam looks like a lot of fun.
I will keep a look out for your posts.
Thanks for the web address. If you intended it to be a live link, it did not work. But I copied and pasted it browser and just like the magic good tech is supposed to be, I was there!
Lovely story. You do have a way with words and story telling. That was well worth the effort (I wish I had made).
I trust you never have, nor ever will put Sumo Cat in a Mawashi. Not that a cat could not be a Sumo Master; I mean, there's a problem with what to do with the tail. Adjustments would have to be made.
I been doing online food shopping today. I notice I spend more when doing online shopping than I would if I was going to the shop, even with someone, who sometimes notices and mentions products I don't. She is v mischievous noticing new flavours of chips, or if certain chocolates I like are on 'special'.
I also like to have lunch or a snack when I go out shopping, even if I was only going up for milk!
I was tempted to go today, just because there is a new fish & chips takeaway shop owner, a refurbished shop, too. I want to check it out. I don't need anything before my online order is delivered.
You're in Queensland you must be warmer than me, I'm in one of the coldest parts of NSW and we're going to have snow in a couple of days! I moved here from the coast just before the terrible bushfires and then covid. Not a good time to move to a new place!
Joni mitchell is great isn't she? If you like Phoebe Snow, have you tried Nina Simone? She's marvellous.
My voice is soprano so I really only suited classical music. A contralto voice is nicer for jazz/blues. I sang with several choirs but I couldn't do it now.
I should have said I play Celtic harp so there are levers to change but no foot pedals like an orchestral harp has, thank goodness! I don't know how they manage all that.
I follow Josh Lane who is a Canadian harpist on Utube who is wonderful, and also Paul Dooley who plays a wire harp which has a very different sound.
A great blues guitarist is Justin Johnson in the USA not the English one by the same name.
I also wish I had played piano. Bass clarinet would be lovely!
I save good play lists to my tablet so I can listen to them easily.
I often get caught with the word count here as I go over it too often and have to delete a lot of what I wanted to!
I tried Zoom recently but didn't like it much. Also Sam found it disturbing and kept barking!
Have you always lived in Queensland? May I ask what happened to your eyesight if you don't mind saying?
Lovely to chat! You must miss your lovely cat. I don't know what I'd do without Sam.
I will try to find your post in the ptsd section.
Lovely to talk with you!
I simply could not fit all the names of people whose music I have enjoyed. I had been drawn to people who write and sing their own songs, and songs I could try to sing. I was in choir for Grade 8 & 9. Things changed after that. We had a wonderful teacher.
I don't like being fenced in - but I would like a house, yard and v high fence.
I want to be able to write, sing, play what ever I hear or see in my head. No limits!
it is fascinating to me to find out how music is made, the instruments and what the musician does as well. How things come together. Little things, like how a fortepiano has pedals for the knees! If I had one, and could play, I'd play 'Knees Up Mother Brown', just for a laugh.
I do miss going there, but pain & discomfort with sitting for half an hour or more, my hearing, the tinnitus and the imbalance of what I hear between one ear and the other makes it not so enjoyable anymore.
As for my eyes, my complicated eyes: I began with Rubella Syndrome, and my lenses were cataracted. The left lens was removed when I was ten months old, while the other was not done until I was two years old. I had bifocal glasses from then on, but I never could read with my right eye. & no one knew.
My Ophthalmologist says it is highly possible I have now got Glaucoma from the Rubella Syndrome. I was diagnosed in 1988. Using eye drops, have had a couple operations on my right eye, and still it has deteriorated so now it sees nothing - except for what my brain is doing to make me think I do see something like a copy of what my left eye is seeing, which is not useful anyway. It is so weird. If I cover my left eye I can't see anything. If I cover my right, I don't even notice. I have lost so much sights, as he explained, my brain is struggling to make sense of the signals & now I & seeing phosphenes lighting up in blotchy colours, so dense they distort the colours thigs ought to be. they brighten & deepen, change hues, swirl or try to make sloppy patterns. Sometimes in a dark room, I see light so bright, I think my eyes ought to be glowing & I should see stuff around me, but nah. Glare is v bad, and geometric patterns I can still see make me feel like I am tripping. Not nice either.
I can't discern feint, dull colours with certainty.
Colour has meant a lot to me. I had enjoyed mixing my paint colours. My clothes & things too.
10y old, I came with my family to Qld from USA.
Don't like abbreviations, but, letters & spaces add up, until .. oops
Dear mmMekitty (with a wave to Hanna3~
I doubt very much an actual contest of any sort would be Sumo's idea of an appropriate activity -no dignity at all. His idea is to store up rest for when needed (if ever)
Plus you have it the wrong way round, he tells me what to do. As for his tale you have read that:)
As it is now wintry he has forsaken his little (well, not that little) platform on the fence post and instead of a morning will fix his gaze on me until I open the front door. He will then move to the top of the first step and sit. If there is a chill in the air or rain or wind he will return inside straight away and accost me for not doing my job properly.
Being a doorman for a cat with standards is no easy task.
Music is a large part of your life, is it possible you could play a keyboard? That opens up a whole gateway, including corrections. I Googled "learn keyboard on youtube" and was swamped.
If I'm mentioning something beyond your capabilities or you have already considered the matter I apologize.
I tried when I was invalided out (before YouTube came along) and was just sitting at home. A second hand electric keyboard from the thrift shop. I had to paint the letters on the keys and use special music books that matched. Never mastered chords. I guess I was looking for fast easy results, then again no concentration and poor memory serves as an excuse.
This was also pre Sumo. I had two dogs, one of whom sat up and grinned till he sneezed and the other thought he was an aeroplane and practiced 'circuits and bumps' right around the house at top speed.
If I forgot to put my earphones on before practice they would decide the far end of the garden ( whch was huge) had suddenly become most interesting.
Geometric patterns? Well Mandalas are such and have been used to induce a trip like state. Disconcerting and inconvenient if unexpected I'd imagine.
I like the fact your shopping companion has a sense of humor
Hi mmMekitty (& to Croix)
Croix I like the sound of your cat! The keyboard idea sounds good, would that be something you could try mmMekitty?
The vision problems sound really challenging for you. What a pain. I'm finding just the loss of vision I have had over the last year difficult and fatiguing as everything takes more concentration to do.
What part of the USA did you come from? I've never been there and I wish I had! Have you ever been back again to visit?
Music is a wonderful interest isn't it?
Are you feeling isolated in the lockdowns? I am here. I miss at least going to the library and having a chat with the staff there. The days are all very much the same.
I got my second AZ vaccination today so that's a relief.
Do you listen to audio books at all? I think a lot depends on who is reading them but I enjoy them sometimes.
Very cold here today but not the snow we were hoping for.
A house and garden and high fence sounds good! Are you in a unit? Are you in a city or regional area?
I hope your day was OK!
Fluffy hugs to you from my little dog Sam, who is fast asleep on the couch next to me after a walk and his dinner!
Hi again, nice people, including Sumo. He does sound beautiful.
Hanna, I forgot the nystagmus! After everything else that seems of no consequence.
When I was a child, and we played 'stare out', gazing into each others' eyes for as long as we could without blinking, the wobble of my eyes freaked the other kids, so I won!
I was born near Seattle Washington, but we moved and mostly lived in California and Maryland, which was where we had snow. Our family moved to Qld in 1970. I have been in one suburb or another of Brisbane since I left home. (except for a brief misadventure).
I hope you, Croix are back, feeling fit and well again, and you have come to read this, too.
I have thought, I would like to have a real keyboard, because I can't fit a real piano in here. I haven't found an electric piano which would have 'user friendly' controls and not a little screen, which I couldn't read. I would like to play at composing. I have to give in & accept looping portions & overlaying tracks etc. I'm really not past grade 1 playing. & I'll just ignore much of music theory. I invented my own called 'near enough is good enough', or 'if I like it, who else need care?'
If I had the space and money, I'd get a Stuart & Sons grand piano. If nothing else, it would be a beautiful piece of furniture.
I wish I could abandon myself to produce in this way if I was to paint again. Just not worry that I cannot aim my brush into the spot I want to fill with colour. So it's a full couple centimetres from the place where, in my mind, it ought to be, so? In my mind it may look perfectly fine!
I've had some problems around here. Not getting the cheese I had ordered from Coles. my broken Fitovers Sunglasses, my desktop seems to have spawed a second desktop off to the right, which I don't notice until I want to use the zoom. I did something, but I don't know what. My PC's speakers have developed crackly, staticy, and sounds like some tiny critters are chatting in the background. I knocked my fry pan onto the floor - it had a couple eggs still soft and sticky, all over the floor. Positive: not on me! We are still masking (you know, if only I could, I would), so I am stuck, until...& I fear our state may well have some high numbers soon, too. My PDr is away, and I won't talk with him until next Thursday, which is not so long away now. This break of his has been hard.
Please, cuddle pets for me.
mmMekitty, 😺❄back soon, after I make a pointy eared snow angel, wot has a tail!
I found you! I’m really sorry you have vision problems & can’t enjoy singing as you once did. My vision was very poor in my teens & 20’s & I was convinced I’d be blind in my dotage & not be able to do all the things I love - read, sew, knit, crochet, other crafts etc. But, I was wrong! My vision hasn’t gotten worse, well not wearing glasses at least. And even that has improved since I had my cataracts removed!
I used to sing too. But I’ve discovered in recent times that it’s a skill lost if it’s not used. And now I can’t sing. I still wish I could but I do enjoy listening to music.
Now onto our dastardly cat, Fluffy. My youngest daughter got her as a second cat but the two cats hated each other. Their favourite trick was to fight in the middle of the night on my daughter's bed. One of them had to go! And it was Mum to the rescue.
We already had a dog/pup & while it was obvious she didn’t like him, she tolerated him. She was relatively easy to feed then too.
BUT - now she bashes our dog up for no other reason than he exists. He likes her but is now terrified of her. It’s really sad to see him so scared. And Fluff has become so difficult to feed. Rule #1 is “if I’ve eaten that brand/flavour yesterday or last week or last month, I won’t eat it today”. I’ve literally spent a fortune trying different brands but as soon as I find one she likes, she won’t eat it!
I’m being constantly outwitted by a cat! She’s not happy & I’m most definitely not happy.
Also, early of a morning (6ish) she wants to be let out, fair enough. Out the hallway door, through the laundry window with the fly screen she’s wrecked, then back to the back door to bang constantly on the pet door to be let back in. Now that’s ok, even twice is ok, but 6 times is not okay! But she’ll sit there going bang, bang, bang, until I cave.
The only thing that maybe might be contributing is she has a heart murmur & bad teeth but we can’t afford the $850 bill to treat that.
So I’m hoping that you’re experience might see where I’m stuffing up. I’m nearly at the end of my tether with her. I’ve suggested rehoming her but hubby looks very nonplussed. It’s ok for him.
Any ideas? Please, if it’s too much just say. I won’t be any worse off.
Thank you for your time, Topsy.
I am no expert is cat behaviour, & how to modify the behaviour is not something I really know much about.
I only encouraged Mekitty, to be vocal, to come up to me, but for the most part, she did what she wanted. Cats are not so easily trained as dogs.
When I first got her, the RSPCA had been giving her, & the other kittens (& everyone), dry food. Mekitty didn't like wet food beyond licking the gravy, leaving a very unappetizing mess. My vet assured me dry food was fine, so long as she got plenty of water. She would not drink water from a bowl, (I tried several, maybe she'd like a purple one, a blue one, a porcelain dish, a metal bowl, but all she did was hook her paw & drag it hard enough to spill the water. Even the heavy dish. I ended up holding a cup up to her so, then, she would drink.
I ended up doing things on her terms.
For her teeth, my Vet had suggested some expensive dry food. The pieces were 2-3 times the size of other dry food pieces. I didn't have to give her many to keep her teeth clean. Dry food is better for that in the first instance anyway.
I made a game of giving her these pieces of food, to get her a little exercise.
I did have a bit of a problem with her wanting to climb the curtains. Fortunately I had very cheap curtains, so I really didn't care. & it was also exercise.
I wish I could have kept her more playful for longer. We had lots of little games. The best was a scrunched up paper bag on a long string. & her rather expensive tunnel, & my own hands & feet - she really liked those fingers & toes! I had to learn to not let the game get too serious.
Fluffy sure is a character. I really don't know what I would do about the things most difficult for you. I wish I was more knowledgeable. I wonder if the RSPCA could help any? If so, careful they don't talk you into getting their pet insurance. A friend I knew told me the premium went up 20% each year.
Our friend Google might help?
I've gotta eat (late) dinner. I'll be back.
Hi again, Topsy,
Forgive me for asking a stupid question, but it is about the pet flap. Does it not swing both ways?
My father actually had to show our pets how to use it, you know, pushing (gently) their heads into it so it would open & even coaxing them forward through it. If I recall correctly, he did that with both cats and dogs. More than once! Did we have dumb animals, or what?
Then, if you have a fully functioning pet flap, & Fluffy gets the idea, you might close the bathroom door so Fluffy cannot jump out the busted screen?
As for the aggression towards Pupdog, I don't know. I wonder how much socialising Fluffy had before coming to live with you?
I'm sure Mekitty would not have tolerated any other pets. I had not had opportunity to socialise her around other animals for the first year & a half.
When one of my neighbours got a small dog, & she'd let her play around outside, near my flat, & from inside, sitting on the windowsill, Mekitty hissed and even clawed the window!
Another time I was taking her up to the Vet. To do that, I had her in her crate, atop my four-wheeled trolley, quite secure, I assure you. We encountered a cat who lived across the road. He was a big ginger, mostly harmless, but Mekitty took exception to him, too. & she hissed & snarled at him. & had a low growling in her throat for other animals at the Vet/s.
When I was a child, we had lots of room. I think, if any didn't get along, they could easily avoid each other. On the whole, though, I think they were all pretty good. One little Chihuahua cross took to randomly nipping, mostly visitors, on the ankle! Eventually, he had to be removed to another room while we had visitors.
My dad could train the dogs. The cats rarely seemed to respond to any sort of training. But, Dad could call Dennis (the white cat) from across the road, & Dennis would come. It wasn't for food either.
Both the cats & dogs liked each other's food. I wouldn't recommend that, as the Vet told me, the nutritional need of cats and dogs is different.
I wonder , how hungry would Fluffy get before she'd eat food you have provided, even if it was the same brand/flavour as yesterday's? Sounds too cruel - maybe ask the vet about the food...I know I used to feed Mekitty too much. I knew I should have been more disciplined about how much I fed her, & not let her get so fat. The Vet was getting onto me in the few months before she died.
I will take a look around Googleland & find, hopefully, something.