I just don't know anymore

[chrissy1]

I have been reading many threads, which makes me feel not so alone. I've had depression for 30 yrs. the last 5yrs have been chronic, that's why I'm in a nursing home.( no where else to go) I could not look after myself anymore. I have lost (commission unit)my unit my car and my baby dog. After many shock treatments, I am on medication which is keeping stable. I just don't have a life anymore. So alone. (Have lost my friends as I was out of action. I'm sure u guys can relate. I struggle with society that they just don't get it, what do we have to do to let them know this is REAL.( as if one could pretend with this illness) I don't think so!!! I really don't have a life

anymore. Being in a nursing home does not help cause when I leave my room I see so many older people around. It does not help my depression at all. That's all for now.thank you for ur time, looking forward to some replies.

my thread name is chrissy1 which some of you may have seen.

chrissy1

[quirkywords]

Hi Chrissy 1,

I was going to say welcome to the forum but I can see you have made a few post. So welcome to this thread.

I am sorry you are in a nursing home but pleased your treatments are keeping you stable.

It is sad that some people don't understand what you are going through.

I see you as brave as you have struggled for so long. Are there any people in the nursing home you can talk to regardless of their age.

Do you have family who visit or you can visit.?

Thanks again for starting this thread.

Quirky

[chrissy1]

Hi quirky,

thanks for ur reply. I am blessed I have a daughter she is my angel. She comes once or twice a week. I do talk to some girls, but they don't have the time. I try to go to the shops, but I really struggle to go. Everything is too hard. I'm just over it.

take care

chrissy1

[Ggrand]

Hello Chrissy,

I am so sorry your MH has caused you to be in a nursing home, but I also like Quirky am pleased you are now stabilised with your medication,

Your daughter really does sound like and Angel, coming to visit you once or twice a week, that is something special to look forward to.

I was wondering if your nursing home has weekly outing, bingo etc.

Please keep talking here I would really like to get to know you better plus you can talk about anything here it your thread now. I also struggle with anxiety and it's so hard for me to even do the weekly shopping. I live alone and well my anxiety stops me from making friends,

I do most of my talking in here, The people here are so friendly and helpful and I've come to care about them a lot.

Pleases keep posting, if you want to. Im here most days, some days I might be struggling with my depression and not on much but I still try to get in here most days .

Its been a real pleasure to get to know and help support you if I can,

kind thoughts

Grandy

[chrissy1]

Hi Ggrand,

thanks for your reply, so great to hear from you.

there are some activities, but I just can't bring myself to go. It affects my depression, I feel worse. I'm my own worst enemy. What are ur days like?

daughter just arrived have to go talk soon

take care

chrissy1

[Ggrand]

Hello Chrissy,

I will leave to to your wonderful daughter, I really hope you both have a beautiful day. It makes me feel good for you today, enjoy and be kind to you.

Will talk later when you are free and feel like it. I'm really looking forward from hearing back from you.

Kind thought

Grandy

[Ggrand]

Hello Chrissy,

I'm just popping in to say hello, I hope you had a lovely day with your daughter,

My days are sad and lonely, but I try to keep myself busy, I've learnt by a lot of the people who are supporting me that when I feel sad and my thoughts are not good ones, to find something I like to distract me from them.

I found some jig saw puzzles, scrabble, solitaire and a few more games that I can at time like to play on my iPad. I don't go outside much for a few years now, but one person from my Mental Health Support Team have come out twice this week to take me for walks. There trying to build my confidence up so I can do it alone, I had an agreement by participating in the walks I stay out of hospital. I decided walk are the better bet.

if you don't mind me asking you, what type of activities do they have there?. Is it anxiety/depression that stops you from going?

Always be kind to your self, and well I'm not on here all day but I do pop in a lot through the day and night. Your probably asleep now. I'm wishing you a really peaceful sleep. 💤💤🦋

If you want to talk I'm here for you.

Kindness only.

Grandy.

[chrissy1]

To chrissy1

hi quirky and grand

my internet is playing up will talk asap

chrissy1

[Ggrand]

Hello Chrissy,

I live in rural NSW and have a lot of internet connection problems which is really very frustrating, I know how your feeling. I hope it gets fixed soon, I'll be here when it does, I'm not going anywhere.

I worked in a nursing home once, I only lasted a few months, I was one of the kitchen hands, my job was to deliver the food to the residents, then collect them all again when dinner was over then wash them up. I liked the job because I loved talking to the residents, I kept getting into trouble by management because I would talk to the residents and everything got late, after a few months I was asked to leave. I still continued to visit the residents that never had visitors.

That was before I got sick with my Mental Health, which has robbed me of talking face too face to people, but I'm working on that with my mental health care team.

I hope you had a nice time with your daughter, will she be coming in again this week to take you out for the day?

Chrissy, I know it's not the same as being there to talk to you, but I really would like to get to know you better and help support you. You sounded so sad in your first post, my heart went out to you. I really would like to be your friend and help you in your loneliness if that's ok.

Kind thoughts only,

Grandy

[chrissy1]

Hi Hi there. Quirky and grand
Hi there. Quirky

To chrissy1

hi grand

great hearing from u. I really would like us to become pen pals, that would be good. How long have u had mental health problems for. Are U male/female and how old u are I'm still having problems with Internet. Not getting signal. So every time I write it cancels my post I don't have a computer I have an iPad. U sound abit like me sad and lonely it's the pits, we are having a hot spell Im not a heat lover., how about u. Where do u live?

hoping this goes to u

take care

chrissy1