FAQ

Find answers to some of the more frequently asked questions on the Forums.

Forums guidelines

Our guidelines keep the Forums a safe place for people to share and learn information.

I can't find the right place for me to post

Moonstruck
Community Member

I don't know any more where to put a new thread if I make one, or which ones to join in. I always used Anxiety because that is my major condition but that has been relatively under control lately - I feel Depressed today - but I don't qualify for the topics there either. I'm depressed mainly because there doesn't seem a place for me. I love some of the threads and personal thoughts for example in Staying Well, but I can't join in there, because I don't have any tips for Staying Well.

I tend to have almost paranoid thoughts through over-thinking "problems" that I would like to talk over but don't know where to talk them over before they reach the paranoid stage...I want to avoid that. I join in the Social threads saying light hearted jokey things because thats the only place I seem to belong.

I dwell on any problems my adult sons have in various aspects of their life and want to "fix things for them" - our relationship is very loving and close though - they are wonderful to me - so there is no real "problem" with my relationship with them....so I don't seem to belong in the "relationships, family" section either do I?

I worry about them all the time - when I tried to express this on forum I think it was misconstrued that I had "empty nest syndrome" - trying to adapt to my sons' leaving home....No, that's not it...they've been gone for years and years...I am a grandmother.

I liked the Getting to Know You, or is it Me? thread very much - but have been given suggestions how to start my own thread and what section to use etc and get the feeling I'm being steered away from there too.

So I am still confused. I don't feel particularly anxious today, so this shouldn't even be in Anxiety! Do you see my dilemma?

In fact the more I write the more I feel like crying - I don't know where to go next.

1,756 Replies 1,756

Croix
Community Champion
Community Champion

Dear Moon and All~

 

I guess a well placed comma can make a difference:

 

Let's eat grandma

Let's eat, grandma

 

These have vastly different dietary implications.

 

The tears ,and mud, will dry as your life gets closer to what it was. You may have to use a smaller bowling ball for a while but I'm sure you will get hte pain under control and enjoy life again

 

OW, talking about his poerty, “I took out a comma.” “Indeed,” returned a critic, “is that all you did?” OW, with a sweet smile, said, “By no means; on mature reflection I put back the comma.”

 

Croix

mmMekitty
Valued Contributor
Valued Contributor

Hello Moonstruck & Croix,

I try to remember the way I was taught to use punctuation, but fear I am forgetting sometimes. Then my PC tries to tell me what I think I have written correctly is wrong. Then, the spelling &/or punctuation suggestions don't make sense to me & I am left wondering how to edit my writing.

I would be happy if you, Moon, would let me know when my punctuation is unbearable.

In the meantime, I am going to put the commas where I hear in my head, they ought to be, which is where readers might like to pause & take a mental, or real, breath.

 

I've been calling you Moon' so much, today, I realised I had very nearly forgotten you are 'Moonstruck', so I will also endeavour to call you 'Moonstruck' more often, so I wn't forget. I didn't like that feeling, searching my mind, thinking, 'Moonbeam'. No, Moonshadow', no. 'Moonriver', no., until I finally thought of it, again.

 

It has been a very disrupted, distressing & difficult year for you, no doubt about that. If talking here helps at all, please continue. You've got friends here, people who care & will make time for you. I know it's been awfully hard, but I am equally sure you are going to learn & be stronger, having lived through these months.

Hugzies

mmMekitty

Croix
Community Champion
Community Champion

Dear Moon (with a wave to MK)`

Your editorial skills go far beyond punctuation I'm sure, and that reminded me of Norman Wisdom practicing an elocution lesson:-

 

'Etty an 'Enery 'eld 'ands on 'Amsteath 'Eath for 'arf a Hour.

 

I guess he needed to keep practicing.

 

I hope the pain is becoming more manageable and life is returning towards a more even keel. You have been though an awful lot and it's time things took a turn for the better

 

I meant to give you a spare comma to put to one side for hard times but mistyped and got a cobra instead.🐍-sigh

 

Croix

Moonstruck
Community Member

Mmm Kitty and Croix....Kitty the Moonstruck came to me from a fave movie with Cher, Nicholas Cage...its superb romantic and reminds me of a big love of my life.....and of course I adore the Full Moon too...magical and powerful....Dont stress over the commas, I will love you just the same.

Hey Croix...after the computer broken down and I was getting behind in work for weeks...guess what!!!  Yep it was pronounced deceased and could not be revived...its now an ex-desktop.

OK...now, lets connect my printer to my little laptop which was all I had to use now....and guess what..not a chance baby!  I followed the instructions, even rang a Support Man in a faraway country who was lovely and went thru it step by step.....nuh....back in to the tech store with both appliances for him to do it for me......nah, not that easy.....found printer had reached its demise also, so off to the Printer Shop to buy another one...back to the technician to connect it to the laptop and I have them both seemingly working in harmony, one step at a time, here at home.    I need not tell you the stress, hours wasted, mental energy, anxiety and helplessness the last weeks have inflicted upon me.......I didn't think things could get any worse...they did!!!

I have more news on another subject which I will continue later.....I am so TIRED. Am I Lazy if I sleep as much as I can find time to?????   xxxxx

Hello Moonstruck - I had remembered you saying your name was the same as a movie with Cher, but I couldn't think what it was ...  

But, no, I don't think you are being lazy to want to take all the time you can grab to sleep, not when you've had such a stressful time dealing with the ex-desktop, the laptop & old printer & new printer, & the time spent on the phone trying to get the old one set up, then having to get the new one set up ... it's all so exhausting.

I'm dreading when I really must get my old PC replaced, with all up-to-date hardware, such as a camera & microphone, & maybe even a touchscreen, along with a printer, & getting my phone synched again, files transferred - the thought alone is enough to make me feel like I want to have a very long nap.

In general, feeling emotional seems to take a lot of energy from me, so I need to have more sleep when I've been feeling emotional, any emotions about anything.

I don't think this is at all unusual.. 

Hugzies

mmMekitty

 

Moon 

I believe in restorative value of sleep, mot lazy bust helping you to cope.

Croix
Community Champion
Community Champion

Dear Moon, wiht a wave to all~

I think it is a tribute ot your coping skills you managed to replace your ex-computer (sounds a bit like ex-parrot) and printer with new ones. It is by no means straightforward.

 

So needing a sleep to restore yourself seem only sensible and not in the least surprising, it has been a stress-full time after all and now thngs are sorted you can relax. And no you are not the lazy type.

 

Moonstruck is indeed an excellent movie, I think it won a great many awards and deals with the complications of love and the merits of La bohème . The actors interact so well it sticks in the mind.

 

I think for once OW does not hit the mark by saying, "Everything popular is wrong". The Moonstruck movie was as popular as movies get.

 

Croix

Moonstruck
Community Member

Hello all....think I mentioned I had another chapter to relate to you and would like advice with.  (advice would entail telling me how I can completely change my automatic catastrophising reaction to future plans and an entrenched fear and stress that I won't be able to cope...in other words, change me into someone else...that ok?)

Made travel plans to visit son and grandkids and to see his "new house" rental he seems to have managed to turn into a happy home-place for when kids are there and his cat and just hold him close after year long trauma of marriage break up.  I haven't seen his house yet nor my grand daughter for nearly a year!  so I had to co ordinate travel plans with cat boarding kennels...a top quality one naturally...for my darling companion who has been my "Just One Reason" for staying alive through my worst year I can recall....times, dates, planes, trains, son's days off work....it seemed like a mountain to climb for my already anxiety ridden brain.  But I did it. I made the bookings which suit....BUT....there's always a "but" I am scared now it won't work out...a family member is picking me up, and maybe late ...gotta go to cat place, then straight to airport...and there's not heaps of time to spare...and will I make it?  Can I do this?  Please advise......Moonstruck. xx

Croix
Community Champion
Community Champion

Dear Moon~

You are having the exact same worries and doubts as you did before and at the time I said I had every confidence in you sorting the travel out -which you did successfully. In fact afterwards you said it all went well.

 

So no, I don't want to change you into someone else, the Moon I know is very capable and will win though. Even if there is a glitch - there is no reason why there should be - you are quite capable of adapting matters and getting there, you are good at thinking on your feet. Your particular version of bowling demands it at times to prevent disaster.

 

You will see your son and granddaughter -and cat- and have a  lovely time and most important remember:

 

I never travel without my diary. One should always have something sensational to read"

 

Croix

 

quirkywords
Community Champion
Community Champion

Moon, my trip to one child requires two long trains or train and bus, and I always worry before hand s9 much so I usually get to places an hr before. It will be great to see your son and grandchildren,dren. You did this before  and it turned out ok and you can do it again. 

So proud you have  organised it all.

You need this trip. 
take care.