I always do things ass about

[velvetfaerie]

My first introduction thread after being here FOREVER..... because I always do things backwards...

Velvz. Bipolar.... type? Not sure. I walked out of the psychiatrists office the day he tried putting me on more meds. That was a decade ago.

Anxiety issues. OCD issues. Occasional SH concerns. Checkered history of substance abuse.

I manage for the most part by exercising, good healthy food and good sleep practices. Substances these days are 3 drinks maximum and I'm rat assed.

I work full time. Study part time. Bought my own house years ago. On my own. Ok the bank helped lol!!! Most days for me are 10-14 hours depending. That's work and study and house things and exercise.

At the moment I'm struggling because I believe I've burnt myself out and pushed myself into hypomania. I'm all over the shop. Been here before but no psychosis stuff. Woo.

Oh man I don't know what else to say. No kids. Love kids. But conscious decision not to have my own. Love men. But sadly I'm intolerant to relationships after a while. Moody 😁😁

Animals and music are my passions.

Yeh so..... **** awkward silence***

velvz.

[CMF]

Hi all,

Velvet - WOW...that is a big thing. It did bring a smile to my face :-). It is good to meet as a 'friend' at first just for the children's sake. nothing wrong with that at all.

WOW!

[velvetfaerie]

I am all ears regarding your opinions on this. Because you are the word of experience !

Was a very very positive serious manoeuvre on hobbits part. the last few weeks he has been VERY good.

But seriously the kiddy stuck to me like poop to a blanket.

HAHAHA

[CMF]

I think it is a good thing and positive in many ways.

He is starting to stand up to his ex which is what he needs to do for his own sake and his own happiness too. Kids can be a bit funny about their parents meeting new people so being introduced as a 'friend' takes that pressure of everyone. If things work out between you, great, they will hopefully be comfortable knowing you are more than a friend and part of their lives. If things don't then they don't see it as another failed relationship like they do with the ex wife. It really is about the kids welfare but sounds like you made a great impression which is not surprising:-)

The break and space you are giving each other sound like it is working. He can focus on what he wants and work to achieve it without feeling pressured. Even though you may not pressure him, the ex does so he needs the space to be able to think, and miss you so he can really see what he wants in his life.

It's all good Velvet, very positive.

[velvetfaerie]

You are SO SMART !!!!!!! Thank you 😄

I am also doing more things I enjoy which are generally along time things anyway. Hanging with friends who are wanting to be social and not just dump things on me, use me. But actually interact beyond those things.

Is it the weekend yet?

[velvetfaerie]

I am cranky. I have PMS. He won't tell the ex about me until the house sells. I understand why, but what if it doesn't sell for like a year?

As a person who works in a scientific field you have to consider all possibilities. His stupid ass doesn't.

V.

[CMF]

I have been in a similar situation so understand your frustration. It causes alot of strain. Hopefully the house will sell sooner rather than later, then he has no more excuses.

cmf x

[velvetfaerie]

Told him I want a casual "you- know -what- buddy'.

Apparently that's not allowed.

[CMF]

ok, so he wants guaranteed exclusivity and commitment but on his exes terms ie you can't see the kids.

What about your terms? What if you set some ground rules? What are your expectations if it has to be a full on containment. Do you want that commitment?

Some things to think about.

[velvetfaerie]

I know right.

LOL at containment. Is his dreams.

😄

[CMF]

Haha i meant commitment not containment, same thing i guess 😂