how do i stop crying

[Matchy69]

I feel so alone,i dont have many friends or anyone who wants to know what i am going through.I just find my self just breaking down and crying.I just want some one to listen and not to judge me.

[Aaronsis]

Hi Mark

I am really sorry to hear that you are not feeling well today and I hope that you can hang around here for a bit and have a chat and get some interaction and feel some connections here. It is great to see you on so many threads and I hope that you do feel the love and support here.

Your game on Friday was so awesome and yes, young Archie Perkins was outstanding..three goals maybe, that was incredible for such a young kid to have such a huge impact on the game, good on him!

I am hopeful that this darn cat will show up and as you say, some cats tend to do this, go away for a few days or a few weeks and then just show up like nothing has happened. It is what it is though and I cannot make her come back and if she does then that is awesome and if she does not, I have to think that she has perhaps found another home.

I have put some brisket in the slow cooker today, I have coated it in mustard and have got a really nice rub on it. I put that on last night and let it sit overnight, then put it in the slow cooker this morning. I hope that it turns out really well and I am thinking of having it with some coleslaw in a roll or something like that. I will also have to get some sauce to put on it too so it is not dry..hmmm so much to think about ...lol

I hope that you can find some small part of the day to create a smile Mark and that you can feel some sense of joy that you so very much deserve.

Huge hugs to you my friend

Sarah xx

[Matchy69]

Hi Sarah I tried to reply to you before my other phone it wouldn't work.

One thing with Essendon is we are ahead of Richmond on the ladder and they have been the bench mark for the last few years.I won't rule them out of the finals yet.

I use mustard a bit n cooking especially with reheating leftovers.I put a table spoon in like left over spaghetti and also like using honey or maple syrup.

My ex is depressing me as I lent her my car at the beginning of the year to she bought another one that her father was going to help her with but she had a falling out with him so she's got my car and told me to sell one of my investment properties and buy a new one.grrr.I just had a text msg her wanting $49 for a iPad she just won on eBay.

A lot other things depressing me at the moment.

I hope your cat comes back but if it dosnt it has found a nice new home like I gave a cat.

How have you been with your mental health?

Take care,

Mark.

[Matchy69]

Hi Sarah I hope you doing ok with the latest rules in Victoria.

[Aaronsis]

Hi Mark

Well here we are in another lockdown situation, while it is frustrating I am of the opinion that there is absolutely nothing I can do about it so I just get on with it. I will use this weekend to perhaps do some cooking and some movie watching and to have some quiet down time and just enjoy the peace. I find that getting all bent out of shape about it does nothing.

We had a ripper win last night so that was a great start to the next couple of days and I will be sure to be watching as much football as I can ..lol I also have some new meat rubs that arrived so I may even do something like that in the slow cooker again, or maybe even try some chicken this time..who knows.

I saw on another post that you have some exciting news with regards to Alabama and the NDIS which is great. I am so pleased that they have the services that they do for our kids that are leaving school and need something for "what next". It sounds really great so I am looking forward to hearing how that turns out for her.

I am doing pretty well with regards to my mental health at the moment, while this month has proven to be a tough one I am feeling ok. We scattered mum's ashes yesterday and that was very emotional but I am glad that we got to do it before another lock down. I cannot actually believe that it has been one year already since she passed. Then I have my brother's anniversary on the 31st but we will not be able to do anything for that as NSW is pretty locked up. So it will be each of us doing something personal I think.

I hope that you can have a lovely weekend, do you have anything planned?

The cat still has not shown up so I am hopeful that she may make an appearance this weekend..who knows but fingers crossed.

Take care and chat soon my dear friend

Sarah xxx

[Matchy69]

Hi Sarah I knew it was coming up to the anniversary so that's why I asked you how your mental health was.I know anniversaries can be triggering.

I hope your cat comes home soon.It is a scarry thing not knowing where they are and have recently moved and the cat might not know the area.

It was good that NDIS gave us the link to the SLES as I didn't think of asking them and didn't know who to contact about my daughter.I haven't read it all yet but they offer financial and other support for school leavers to find work and transition into work.

I haven't been feeling the best and didn't have a good night's sleep with stomach pains.

I managed to watch the game last night but missed the cats one as I went to bed early.I don't even know who the dons are playing this weekend.Hopefully we can get another win.

Cold and windy here today and have the fire going.

Take care,

Mark.

[Aaronsis]

Hi Mark

How are you feeling? How is the tummy feeling?

I am doing ok…I feel so much peace with having done mums ashes and now can focus on how I will acknowledge my brother’s anniversary seeing we are in lockdown. It might be a candle but will do something…. Tough times at the moment.

I am working from home so that is a nice change for me as I mostly still go into the office but this time choosing to do the home shift, I am somewhat enjoying the slow pace.

No sign of the cat yet as we come into 2.5 weeks which is longer than last time. I have hope but am starting to think realistically that she won’t be back.

Such great news for Alabama and what next for her after school… such great news for you too so I really hope that goes well for you all.

The weather today was really wild and we had so much rain… nice to be at home while that is going on.

Huge hugs to you my friend

Sarah xxx

[Matchy69]

Hi Sarah how are you?I still have stomach problems and always have but are worst at the moment.I am glad you sorted your mother's ashes out and that has helped you.I still need to do something with my mum's ashes.They are still sitting at my brother's house and wee going to put them in the wall with my dad's.I had an idea of scattering where they had there honeymoon on an island of Cairns.

The kids have been home sick and got tested which was like an 8 hour day for them.It was negative.

I am sorry your cat hasn't come back yet.Mine has been annoying me and keeping me awake at night.I hope it does return for you.

I just put a load of washing on and will head into town when that is finished to get a couple of things.

It has been very cold and have had the fire going.Rsin forecast for tomorrow.

Take care,

Your friend,

Mark.

[Aaronsis]

Hi Mark

Gee it is not good to hear that your stomach is still bothering you, I hope that you can get that sorted and it doesn't go on for much longer.

It really has given me some peace with doing the ashes, like the circle as been completed and we can lay her to rest and have given her a goodbye. I hope that you can do something like what you mentioned with your mum's ashes too, and that you can get some peace too, it would be wonderful for you to have some closure too.

Yeah it is tough to not know what is going on with the cat, I just hope that she is with someone who is caring for her, that is all I can think as the alternative is too sad. I just keep waiting for her to rock up like last time and just walk in the door like nothing happened. I had to laugh though when you said yours is annoying you, I have to shut my door at night or mine would do the same, and take up all the bed...

The fire sounds so lovely as it is really cold here too..I am sure it is both soothing to watch and to get the warmth from, I would really love that now, a fire is great!

Just enjoying my morning Chai and then off to get all this mail done at work.

Chat some more to you soon my friend

Hugs

Sarah xxx

[Aaronsis]

Hi Mark

Just wanting to stop in and say hello and hope that you are still here and reading and that you are not feeling like you are not welcome here, you are and you are needed here too.

I hope you are ok and I am sending warm hugs and thinking of you.

Hugs

Sarah xxxx

[Aaronsis]

HI Mark

I hope you are still here and reading as I think of you daily and wonder what you are up to and how you are doing.

I just wanted to stop in and say hello, that I hope you are okay and that if you want to still chat I am here, but if not that is totally fine too.

Huge hugs to you and hope to chat some time, or not or sometimes, what ever you like.

Hugs

Sarah xx