Do you think the way l'm living is ok for now?

[Guest_1584]

Hi BB.

l feel like this is another dumb question from rx , but ah well.ln times of uncertainties we might ask some of those right.

We sep' and divorced 5yrs ago , threw life into a spin. Together 19yrs before. l've stayed in the area to be close to my d, 16now, and finally got another house of my own 15mths ago.

l was with someone new nearly 2yrs but it hasn't worked out unfortunately but being long distance 70% of the time, there was lots of days and nights spent at home in our little private bubble world of messaging and skyping .

So now that we've split, l still haven't built any sort of a new life really. Got this hosue because loved the spot and the house itslef and great views and it's only 20mins form my d's town. lhoped l'd like it here , maybe even make a new life. But ldon't really fit in this town and so it's beena lot more time at home, l work at home too.

Nit sure if l'll stay here , but l do love the house and spot and views and in spare time can easily just hang out around the house days on end , basically alone, bt l dunno, it's just and old renovator but just really comfy to hang out in, live.

If l'm working l always try to get out most days, pick up spares or spin over to one of the other towns for a change of scenery , or some lunch, whatever.Or locally up to the shops even , groceries whatever , anything just to get out for awhile.

lately l've sort of developed a bit of a pattern in spare time. love hanging out around the house a day , 2 or 3, but then l make myslef go see some, a drink with my brother, or another mate l know, or up to the main town , see my daughter some days, or beach , go for a hike, or something. No pubbing or night life.

Same with wkends, l try to get out somewhere one day, hang out at home the other.

But that's pretty well life has been since split with gf. Mostly alone , andl enjoy lately just hanging out around this house , maybe way way too much , not sure. music or some reno's or movies , internet. It's just big and roomy and airy , views , and comfy. l often get claustrophobic but never in this house,

Do you think what l'm doing atm is ok , l really worry l'm alone too much or taht l'll slip into hermitizing too much, l dunno.

Any thoughts welcome.

rx.

[Guest_1584]

Thanks very much grandy , that was very nice of you and l know you have your own crapola going on this week. Good luck with it eh.

And yeah , it is hard God l dunno , bloody lifes hard isn't it.

Gday paul mate and thanks again and thank you too always great to have you around.. You come out with some great lines of wisdom too mate and it's always appreciated.

But hell yessa , mega confusing alright. l wsih gf and l split because of feeling but sadly it was only circumstances and l know its a bit soon to be meeting anyone. l wasn't expecting anything zero expectations but , tis what it tis , well so far anyway and l think you'd be right. l'm crazy if l don't just see now and go with is. .lt might amount to nothing in the end anyway , you know how this stuff can be m but it might not. And not that l'm using her but it is helping a lot too we help each other a lot and she knows all about ex sooo, we see how things roll l guess.

No worries at all mate you gotta do you thing . That's a toughy isn't it and l hope your having some successes , best of luck with things.

rx

[blondguy]

Hey RX

Thankyou for your understanding and the complimentary post too!

I know some people say that 'its too soon' as per meeting anyone. I have grown weary of what other people say in regard to my own personal life as well.

Just my opinion....I think that companionship is wonderful to have RX ....even after recovering from being in a relationship . It can provide us with some peace of mind and some closure as well. Good1!

Thanks again for understanding about my daughter RX

Best always

Paul

[CMF]

Hey rx,

i agree with Paul, compniinship is great when we are struggling with feelings of hurt, especially someone who understands. Anyway, what is 'too soon'? We can't control when we will meet someone and how we will feel. Just go with it, no pressure, and see where it leads...hmmm...sounds familiar doesn't it 😉

[Guest_1584]

Just thoughts. And thanks as always paul , and cm/ always appreciated.

Weird l haven't been counting but l think l've spent 3 or 4 wkends alone at home lately.The effort l was making , l duno . just ahven't got around to even them lately and the weekends have flow past before l have time to even think about it.

That's been exactly where l knew l'd end up if l stopped making effort to get about and about and that's what l've been worried about. l just don't think it's any damn good for us being home on our own week after week. But it's also been freezing , mid winter here so we're forgiven for hibernating, if it's ok for the bear then l can't see why it's not for me haha.

Still , it's mostly taken up with new girl anyway , yes we're still at it near 24/7 these days. and l'm still confused about the sitch and with ex gf, feelings, well it's not really a confusion about her as such but more about being with someone else if that makes sense.

But she just continues to amaze , there's such a comfort and ease about her, us , but not in a boring way. No hope she's no push over or pussy cat , nice and fiery and very passionate and no qualms speaking her mind or straight over me if she hasn't finished , in a fun way l mean, but it's also in an ease kinda way too, hard to explain , and l'm the same with her, whatever the same is . And she's so bloody intelligent , she's only been speaking english 7 yrs but she catches onto anything even in business or property , or things goin on in the world or things l'm saying or whatever, anything, in a split second flat. And me , l'm not an easy person to get but she just does like almost auto. but like l say far from in a boring sense we get pretty lively but it doesn't matter ir's some kinda ease.

Hope this isn't a repeat , butttt, it's still also confusing on account of ex gf though. Can l still love her but yet with this thing going on with new girl , l dunno , l do still love her of course but , well l don't know anything right now tbh on all that front.

l don't know how to sort out both feelings as new girl is , well , not to say that it might even last anyway at this stage l guess, so early pearly anyway anything could happen in these things. but the two feelings are getting muddled .

Scuse the rant once again and any repeats.

[Guest_1584]

Today was a big day ,. especially for a Monday. l usually try to let the week warm up a bit before l go tackling any heavier business , phones or whatever. But l'm a bit worried about time in my house sitch , and l've been putting off the calls l have to make to get the ball rolling for weeks now and l'm out of time. So , It was a monday.

L'm into this [property with a partner of sorts and the biggest call needed was to talk to them and let them know l'm selling my share. well , to put it simply without going into nitty gritty.. But I've been putting the call off for a month, day after day after day.

Anyway , it's done , and they were pretty good about it too which was a relief. So we;ll be working through it and how to do the deal so that l can move on and hopefully, still maybe even make a bit of money out of my end of it. Soooo, as of today l am officially moving out and away,sometime near end of year.

The ramifications are big , to a whole new area 2hours away, "finally", away from ex and her turf , to bigger everything with oodles of things going on and life on offer all over the place , 20 times the amount of people and lots lots more. It's exiting but scary . For anyone that doesn't know l've lived all over the country buttttt, this now , is a whole nother thing and everything over the last 5yrs has been the result of the divorce and this is just more of the same.

But now it finally feels like l can finally truly start over properly and leave all that behind ,

[Guest_1584]

Well , last few days have been daunting , and scary , and upsetting.

first up , things have finished for now with new girl. l'm just not in a good place right now. Ex gf stuff , l've also had huge hassles last few mths, and now houses and moving. Well , ng also has huge stuff going on , AND, a messy divorce too. It's all just too much combined.

but, that all also means alone again , and yet so much going on . Sometimes l think is it ever gonna end.

The house stuff and any moving also feels just too much right now as the idea sinks in.l just don't know though , l can't stay surely , 11 yrs here and the only things happened have been bad, ex w is everywhere and a constant reminder, and even although l have met some nice people l don't fit in over all and made no friends, had no good times, works been constantly hard here,

Wouldn't l be crazy not to finally throw in the towel and move rather than stick around and possible watch life go even more down the toilet. ?

Trouble is , my daughter will be nearly 18 by the time l did move but that still really troubles me, l'd be 2 hours away. for the first time. And seeing her will get even less. l dunno , l was moved out of home at 17 and living on the other side of the city, so were friends. She just still feels so young though , can't shake the feelings.

The other thing is that l'm not really up to such a move and restart . like l wanna get away , mostly , l think , but the actually move and finding a place , managing it financially, starting completely over, l loved all that once , done so many , but the thought now and all on my own, well.

Sometimes l'd love to be married again , not only for the connection and togetherness, but to know and have someone in your corner again. To be working together , handling life and big shyt like this too , together.

rx

[Guest_1584]

l have a big decision to make.

Do l sacrifice more life and stay here maybe another 8 to 12 mths and renovate this place more and then sell it off ?

And what will the market be like then ? There should be , roughly about 70k in it for me after costs. going on the prices right now here , if l went that way. And that'd be a huge help toward restarting when l move as l won't leave with much if l go later in year as planed. So this is an option l've been thinking about and after some more talks with the partners in the whole property , we've worked out l could go this way if l decided too.

But it means roughly another 12mths here , and that passes a key birthday that l wanted to be out of here well and truly for.and by. And it also means , if the past is anything to go by and if what S said is anything to go by , about another 12mths of no life , zero. While l stay , do the place up and hopefully flog it off.

l do really need that money , it'd be a huge boost, but 2 yrs of zero life here already, getting older and life just passing by , l just dunno if l should just cut and run , and get back to a life.

Any passers by and thoughts , would be really appreciated .

rx

[blondguy]

Hey RX

I hear you and understand the 'separation' word (and the after effects)

I understand that you love your place and would do anything to live there and renovate it as well

Renovation + Time = $ as you know...I think you just answered your own question when you mentioned that the dollars would be huge boost.....and you made a good point about getting older and life passing us by too

2 years of zero life already.......just my humble opinion if thats okay RX.....I'd be out

Your thoughts?

my best always for you

Paul

[Guest_1584]

Thanks for that mate very appreciated welcome your thoughts.

Starting to think you might be right too . l dunno , if we're 25 eh , what's another year of this but sadly far from . l'm noticing now with a bit more time the thought of staying another year maybe longer isn't sitting very comfortable with me at all either , think l agree mate.

Cheers for that.

How's things going with that daughter of yours , don't have to answer that by the way mate. But l hope your well and things are ok.

All the best

rx

[Guest_1584]

Well like the saying , it ain't over till it's over l probably should've held off on things with ng ending because ahh , false alarm.

l'm not sure how to put the brakes on a little or what to do though because there's still the issues but the thing is we get along so well and have so many same ideals well , instead it's kinda taken on life of it's own., shyt , love it but there's well , the stuff.

why couldn't life just be simple.