Alone..Depressed..Sad..

[Ggrand]

Hi..I'm new here..just need to put my feeling down..no one to talk to makes depression and anxiety so hard...the last 4 days I have either been in bed crying or on the lounge crying..I can't seem to get out of this...I am becoming a prisioner in my own home as its getting progressively difficult to go out.. I have to go out Tuesdays so I do everthing on that day but it's like I'm holding my breathe all day until I get back to the safety of my home then I can let go and that starts the cycle again of spending the next 6 days at home either in bed or on the lounge sad and depressed...I really feel like just giving up.. My husband passed away 4 years on This coming Thursday. My children live 6 hours drive away and have small children so I don't see them that much.Bad mum and grandmum I am on there last visit i was pleased to see them but I just wanted them to go home. I feel so aweful and numb atm..

[Lee lee 73]

Hello Grandy,

Just want to wish you goodnight my beautiful friend. I do hope you are able to sleep.

Remember to keep breathing and take yourself to your happy place ❤❤🤗🤗 .

Sending you comforting hugs 🤗🤗 and sitting with you beautiful lady. Hoping tomorrow is a better day for you!

😍😍

❤ Lee

[monkey_magic]

Hope I got that right. Just felt a spiritual thing come to me and say that...hope I'm not scaring u..and hope I got it right

[demonblaster]

Hi sweety and all your other lovelies ☺

Just dropping in to put the kettle on and prepare lunch.

Oh look at Ebony and Kya letting Destiny and Eternity gently bite their little ears. Wow see how high they can jump haha now the furs are chasing them. SO cute.

Hope todays a bit clearer for you beautiful good lady.

Always in my thoughts precious friend with love 🌜💑🌛

💜🤗😚 🤝

Hope everyones days good

[Ggrand]

Hello Deebi, Tess, Lee, Magic..

Thank you all for your kind and caring posts..The are so very much appreciated....

Oh Magic you done good, you got it right and I so like the idea of sustaining my soul with natural...love and smiles...thank you🕊..

Tess..Thank you..Unfortunately I have only a few choices, admit myself voluntarily, be admitted by my psychiatrist or “run a way”...I’m trying to be brave and do the first option, because I have listened to you all and know that you are all right...

Lee, Thank you ive started to relax, yes he did say they will ring me first...Thank you for sitting with me last night..it really does help..

Deebi..Thank you so much..I would love a pot of tea and some yummy lunch.....Betty has her son, granddaughter and great grandchildren visiting her today...4 generations all together that’s gold.. rang me asking me to come up as well. But I said no....(I don’t want to interrupt their family time)....

The Little furs are so cute and that little bit of their playtime you just told me about made me smile...🤗.... your so good for my soul honey....L🦄vE Y👼u sweet dear friend..💜

I am okay today thank you Deebi, trying to put Psychiatrist out of my thoughts...I thought about..could be tomorrow or next week even three week plus..until a room becomes available...

I hope everyhere is having a lovely day today...and your all doing good with some nappies in your day...

Love and hugs 💜💜🤗🤗...

👩‍❤️‍💋‍👩Grandy🌜🦄👼🌛.

[Guest8901]

Hi Grandy,

Sorry for my absence, I'm just going through a really tough time right now. I am still reading along here with you though, as well as several of the others (Deebi, Pepper, Lee, Magic and Tess). I will get to you all soon ... promise.

Grandy ... I'm glad you report that you sound like you're more settled today, more in control. Definitely a plus. Now its a matter of waiting to hear from your psychiatrist that a room has become available. I'm relieved that you are leaning towards taking the best and safest option available to you, that of voluntarily admitting yourself to this place. At least that way, you are in control and you can make your own decisions about treatment and therapy options. Including the ability to discharge yourself when you feel the time is right, rather than of their choosing. I really like Lee's suggestion that you make notes of what you DO NOT want, ie the ECT therapy. If you admit yourself voluntarily, they cannot force that on you if you choose not to have it. So in order to reinforce in your own mind that you do not consent to ECT treatment, as well as the therapists treating you, then that sounds like a great idea. So make lots of large lettered signs, which you can stick on your bathroom mirror, along side your bed, on your cupboard ... where ever you or others will see it. Its really hard to say no sometimes, but this is definitely an instance where you need to be very strong in your own commitment. So reinforce it to yourself in any way you can.

In the meantime, spend as much cuddle time with Ebony and Kya. Is it still very hot where you are? It is here, and windy as well. But we may get thunderstoms later today, before a cooler change tomorrow.

Love and hugs to you too Grandy. And thank you for reassuring me that its okay for what I said yesterday morning. I really only say it because I so badly want you to get the treatment and care you need and deserve. This could be your big chance to get that. Just remain strong, as I know you can be. You know you have all the support possible from your many admiring and loving friends here.

Amanda 💜🤗

[Ggrand]

Hello Amanda...

Please don’t apologise for not being able to post here on mine...Please take your time reading/posting here..Your first priority is to keep your strength up, by looking after yourself and being gentle and kind with you....I will pop over to yours sometime today/night to say hello and drop off a smal gift for you and Charli...

I have a lot to think about here...3 weeks is a very long time to be away from home...my home is my safe spot...outside my front gate I don’t do good at all...

I have never been away from Kya and Ebony, how can I leave them with someone I don’t know? What if they cry for me, or they get sick, or they don’t get some playtime and pats...What if they escape and then get lost....I’m scared for them....😢..

So much to think about....I’m trying to stay strong, sometimes i think about going and it seems to be good because I might begin to start healing my broken soul....then at other times I get too scared to even contemplate going there.....sigh....

Love and hugs back to you dear Amanda...💜🤗..and everyone who wants/ needs them....

👩‍❤️‍💋‍👩Grandy....🌜👼💜🦄🌛..

[Lee lee 73]

Hello Grandy,

I understand your concern and sadness for your furbuddies Kya and Ebony hon. They will have each other Grandy, that's a good thing. It's hard because we can tell them 'we'll be back' but they don't understand do they? But you come first Grandy, your quality of life comes first - For you and for Kya and Ebony. I know you know this and I know it may not help but it's one thing you can hold on to..! Hopefully when you get back home you will be able to take them for walks again....they would love doing that with you again 😚.

Also remember beautiful, it's your illness that is keeping you at home in your 'safe spot'. It's your illness making you feel scared. With treatment, you can begin to change this.

I hope your day was better than ok lovely lady. I hope you are ok?

Always in my thoughts Grandy ❤

Amanda - love reading your posts.

Monkey Magic - I love that you say what you think.

Goodnight Grandy - sending you comforting hugs 🤗🤗🤗 ❤❤

Goodnight everyone.

❤Lee

[Ggrand]

Hello Lee, Deebi and everyone,

Thank you Lee, yes they always have each other and that’s what is really important.....

Oh I wish I could take them for walks, but as soon as I put a collar on them,,,Kya drops her head and won’t move...Ebony stands like a solder so rigid and won’t budge....I tried to a few times to put a collar on them...😁but they don’t like them so they don’t need them...poor little puppies.🐶🐶...

I so hope you are right Lee...

I wish everybody a good day today...the sun is shining here it’s hot and muggy...The birds are loving the bird bath today....if I charged each of them an admission fee..I would be 🤑....

Deebi 👩‍❤️‍💋‍👩. I hope your doing okay and your day is a good day for you today. Love to you Deebi...heaps...🌜💜💓💜🌛..

Love and hugs..💜🤗...

👩‍❤️‍💋‍👩Grandy🦄💜👼..

[Lee lee 73]

Hi beautiful Grandy,

Awwwwwww Kya and Ebony sound like my kind of dogs 😊. I reckon I'm too lazy to have a dog.

I just topped up my bird bath too Grandy. Iszy gets entertained when they visit. Not that we get as many as you 😍.

I hope you're ok too beautiful.

Big hugs to you my good friend. 🤗🤗🤗.

❤Lee

[demonblaster]

You're a classic Grandy 🤑... 😂

I was starting to feel a bit down and trapped, stopped playing bubble game and read that.🤣

Anyone gotta fag 🤒 or 🍫🍰🎂 handy

Sounds lovely the birdy bath, nice seeing them do their thang

Lee I'm still SO in love with your Avatar hun

Love to ya Grandy beautiful🌜💜💑💗🌛

💓👀🤝👂🏻