Alone..Depressed..Sad..

[Ggrand]

Hi..I'm new here..just need to put my feeling down..no one to talk to makes depression and anxiety so hard...the last 4 days I have either been in bed crying or on the lounge crying..I can't seem to get out of this...I am becoming a prisioner in my own home as its getting progressively difficult to go out.. I have to go out Tuesdays so I do everthing on that day but it's like I'm holding my breathe all day until I get back to the safety of my home then I can let go and that starts the cycle again of spending the next 6 days at home either in bed or on the lounge sad and depressed...I really feel like just giving up.. My husband passed away 4 years on This coming Thursday. My children live 6 hours drive away and have small children so I don't see them that much.Bad mum and grandmum I am on there last visit i was pleased to see them but I just wanted them to go home. I feel so aweful and numb atm..

[Ggrand]

Hello Deebi...I'm sorry Deebi..I hate being like this..

[Ggrand]

Awwe I'm really sorry I woke you up...Please go back to sleep sweetheart..You need a lot more sleep to get yourself healing again to get better...I will be okay..

[demonblaster]

I do too Grandy.

What actually one of the only things that helps is knowing it'll pass.

Have you had any sleep? I have to go back soon, big day tomoz was going to cancel. Seeing friend too and was going to catch another on her break but nah for good reasons.

Uncanny being here now cause woke and thought don't come here but of course did.

I do love you no matter what.

[demonblaster]

You didnt wake me but incredible I did come in when you needed someone.

Yeah going back soonish.

Sleeps the key for MH. One day i hope to get control over that too. Our minds are very powerful if we can tap into them.

You're in a horrible place. Hope the scans give you some answers.

On my tablet don't know if cause it's an 8 in size or gremlins but can't see last couple of words so I guess. I've been leaving a gap so in case same for others.

Hot bath might help, hope so.

[Ggrand]

No Deebi, no sleep. My thoughts are to busy...Please go back to sleep...For me...Please...don't know I should get back here at around 1pm..then I'll sleep...

Good Night ...please sleep again ..my bath is ready...a bath a cuppa I will be okay...🌹🕊🐍🔥..Thank you for ending me Deendy..

Love you as well..but please go back to bed...💜🌹🤗🕊

Grandy.

[demonblaster]

May as well breaky since I'm up then can sleep bit longer.

Enjoy bath.

Hope today goes better than you plan on and that you do sleep in arvo poor thing.

Nigh nite. 💜🕊

[Peppermintbach]

Hi Grandy (and all),

I hope you felt a little better having your bath and cuppa ❤️ All the best at the hospital today too. Sending many gentle hugs and quiet company.

Love and care,

Peppy xoxo

[Ggrand]

Hello Deebi, and all..

Deebi, Thank you so very much for coming in and talking to me this morning I can't thank you enough for doing that.I was so scared to come here today...to this hospital because, I knew I couldn't ask "Betty" to come today because she has the people from government home care comes to help her today I made it here and am waiting to be called.I have been approached twice by a nurse as I still can't control my tears I have told her that I'm fine just having a bad day with my mh she has told me that she will get someone to talk to if I want I said no I don't need anyone, I'm fine...I can manage this, Where I'm sitting is where I sat waiting for my hubby when he was first diagnosed with cancer..very hard Hurts deep I want to run I should not have come. oh no not again gee I'm over this I'm becoming unstuck again....Geez life is so hard, so sad, so cruel, too many people here they are looking at me I want to hide, Nurse just told me I'm next...bbl.

[Guest8901]

Holding your hand in understanding and compassion.

Soon it will be finished and you can head home again. If you still feel so upset on completion of your scans, consider taking up the nurse's offer to talk to someone. It wouldnt hurt to do so. And its not a good idea driving home afterwards if you feel so sad and teary.

With you, and will be around for another hour or so if you need to talk.

Sending love. Oh and btw ... well done getting there this morning. An achievement in itself. I know how hard that would be for you. So many memories in play. Remain strong, which I know you are.

Amanda xx

[demonblaster]

Well done Grandy getting there. Sweet try to redirect your focus on why your there, getting hopefully some answers for your health and hoping fixes. Result of this potentially could be less pain and stress.

I'm sorry for your sad hard memories 🤗. As Mandy said it won't be long and you'll be back home again having a nice hot cuppa and your candles and fur buddies.

Sitting right next to you 🤝, we're chatting and laughing.

All the best Grandy remember to breathe and relax on exhale

💜🕊