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Loss my husband to brain cancer

MyMicka
Community Member
I am 43 years old and 3 weeks ago tomorrow I lost my 43 year old husband to brain cancer. He was first diagnosed 12 1/2 years ago. The past 6 months was awlful then at 1:20 on the morning of the 22/07 he took his last breath. I feel completely heart broken. Sometimes I feel I just can’t breath. I am lost and have no idea what I’m suppose to do now.
4 Replies 4

Soberlicious96
Champion Alumni
Champion Alumni

Dear MyMicka,

I am so sorry for your loss. It is so heartbreaking losing a loved one. Even when you know they're sick, and even in you 'know' it's coming ........ the reality of it actually happening is still so awful and such a heavy burdern.

I lost my Mum from Bowel cancer about 7 and a half years ago now, but I still miss her often. There are days when I just want to call her and tell her about my day or my week.

I know that it feels at times like things will never get any better, and given that this is still so fresh for you, that's not surprising. But three weeks isn't very long. This is a time to be very very gentle with yourself and just take things minute by minute. I would like to also suggest that perhaps you might consider getting some grief counselling if you do feel as though you are really not coping?

In the meantime, just remember that it takes some time to adjust to life without a loved one. And remember too that you are welcome here for as long, and as much support as you need. The BB forums are 'open' 24/7. And of course, there's lifeline; 131114.

Take care. I'll be thinking of you. xo

Fairybear
Community Member
I am so sorry that you lost your husband. There are never enough words to ease your pain. I guess the only thing. I can say is hold on, you will find your way out of the darkness and the sun will shine again.

My husband passed away in May of 2018. While I still feel immense grief it is getting more manageable. My son and I move forward with our grief.

Philomena
Blue Voices Member
Blue Voices Member

Dear MyMicka

My deepest condolences on the loss if your husband.

The fact is the pain can never be taken away but you need to feel and express your grief to process the loss.

Grif is a normal reaction and everyone grieves differently. Grief has many emotional and physical reactions too. Some of the emotion all reactions you may feel are sadness confusion numb denial fear anxiety and depression and the physical reactions are breathlessness sweating shaking weight gain or loss panic attacks head ache stomach pain palpitations confusion and thoughts you may feEl why such a thing happened and that you are going crazy and you may feel withdrawal not wanting to participate in activities you did before. These are some of the reactions.

Bit you need to accept the reality of the grief by have a memorial service where yoit relatives or friends gather and work through the grief also have an ongoing conNecton with your husband though he is not present in your heart and mind by sharing his memories and biographies.

You may also join a support group in your area where you will meet others who grieve and know you are not alone in your grif. These support groups also have activities which you may like to participate in.

Try to develop new skills and new friends which keep you occupied .

Stay strong .