How do I cope without my baby?

[scully78]

I lost my little 18 yr old chihuahua Tayla on Saturday. She was an abused rescue and I had her for 11 of her 18 years. We were joined at the hip! In the last 3 years, I would take her absolutely everywhere except work. I wouldn’t plan any occasions unless Tayla could be there with me. Took her to the gym, coffee shop with friends and she was adored by everybody. Got a lot of attention and pretty much everyone in my social circle knew her and loved her. She would sit with me while watching telly, walk around while I garden and patiently wait for me while I had my appointments.

Her passing has been a very confusing and painful experience. She died of congestive heart failure, so it was very sudden and unexpected. There were no warning signs. She seemed very happy and energetic the morning before her attack. I very quickly took her to the vet and within 2 hrs of arriving she deteriorated. In the consult room, she looked like she was hurting, so I asked the vet to hurry with the injections. She died in my arms with her head resting on my chest.

Since her passing, I don’t know what to do. She was my world! My day was structured around her 5am/5pm medication regime and around her needs as well as my own. I loved every minute spent with my little girl, with the mornings being my favourite part of the day with Tayla. That’s when I would feed her, take her to the lake, coffee shop, gym, beach…whatever was planned. Now, I dont feel like I have a reason to get out of bed in the morning. I am terrified of waking up each day with the realisation she isn’t here with me anymore. I haven’t talked to her, held her or kissed her in 5 days now and I miss her so much. She brought so much love and laughter to my life and now she’s gone. I live alone, and feel like there is no point to life without her. We loved each other so much and we were a perfect match in life, had so much fun. Our bond was very strong. I hate going to bed without her and I hate waking up without her. How do you get on with life without your soulmate? Im struggling to find a point to it all.

[Sophie_M]

Hi scully78,  Thank you for sharing here. We’re sorry to hear you’re feeling life is pointless now. The loss of a pet can be truly devastating, please know that we’re here for you.  You can reach us directly on 1300 22 4636 or online. Do you have any loved ones you can confide in during this time? Maybe you’d like to share with the community any ideas you’ve had to help remember or commemorate Tayla?  Kind regards,   Sophie M 

[scully78]

Hi Sophie,

Everyone is busy, so its been a very lonely process. I have had friends come over a couple of times, but otherwise, Im on my own. 

The one way id like to commemorate Tayla is to adopt some of her traits. She was very loving and sweet. Didnt let anything bother her. Loved her family and the outdoors and life in general. Her attitude was admirable and made her so adorable.

[Ggrand]

Hello Dear Scully78..

I am so very sorry for the loss of your precious fur girl….I couldn’t image how hard it would be for you…My condolences…

You rescued her from an abusive home and gave her 100% of your love, care and time…you gave Tayla a beautiful, loving and caring family life for 11 years…Something she wouldn’t have have if you didn’t rescue her….Gee my heart goes out to you Scully…

I think that how hard it will be, to remember all the lovely and fun times you had with her…and know that you gave Tayla a beautiful life….Unfortunately dogs don’t live forever or most times as long as we do….and the shock of loosing our beloved companion can be so hard…..

My heart goes out to you so much…I have 3 dogs…2 little ones (mum and daughter) and a rescue dog I took on around 3 months ago….I am elderly and live alone…except for my fur girls…..I can resonate to how hard it would be for you to get up each day and not have her in your life….I am so deeply sorry…..

Here for you sweet Scully, if you feel to talk…

My kindest  thoughts with my care..and if it’s okay, a gentle caring hug…🤗..

Grandy..

[ecomama]

Dear Scully, I am so sorry for the loss of your beautiful girl. Gosh I can see that Grandy has popped in to share her warmest love and support for you. 

There are so many dog and pet lovers on the forums. We all hang out on Grandy's, Paws and others threads. 

Losing a beloved pet is devastating. I know. So many of us here know this feeling. 
She LOVED YOU. 
11 years of the purest love is so amazing to experience. 

I have a house and garden FULL of rescue pets! 
I can't imagine a life without having them. 
Offering them a sanctuary here in a home full of love and kindness and TONS of treats. Too many some times. 

I want to tell you that another precious creature is waiting for you. I know it's hard and the next pet is NEVER a replacement. But they need us so desperately. We could even need them MORE. 
They know when they are important in our lives and you are a PERFECT pet owner to have so much love and dedication for your baby girl. 

This time is dreadfully painful but I know you're going to do it all over again. 
Hugs and more hugs. 
Love EMxxxx

[scully78]

Thank you Grandy❤️

I gave her a good life, but she made mine so beautiful and gave me so much more than I gave her. I miss her so much

[scully78]

Thank you eco mamma♥️ Its great you have saved so many lives. I wish to do the same during my lifetime. Tayla definitely cant be replaced, but the house is so empty without her. I haven't ruled out another family member, as it is a very quiet house when you live alone. I just need time to grieve Tayla for now. 

[ecomama]

Dear scully, of course you need time to grieve Tayla. 

It could be too early to ask this, but have you thought of any special ways of remembering her? 
Like a Memorial of some type? 

Not that you need anything to remember her by.
Just wondering if you've thought that far ahead. 

Love EM

[scully78]

Hi EM,

I was lucky to have seen my therapist yesterday. Getting through the day without her has been my biggest challenge as I did everything with her. Ive have a fear of doing these things again with her absence, but I have to do little bits at a time. He suggested I do all the things that we used to do together, but when im ready and not too much at once. She was very adventurous, loved the outdoors and the beach. Im starting with local things for now. With the weather improving, Im aiming to make it to the beach soon to honour her little adventurous spirit. 

As for a memorial, I am still waiting for her ashes to come home. It will be comforting to have her back with me and I will be able to set up a memorial for her. 

[MoliMum]

HI Scully, i am so very sorry for your loss. Please know i understand completely where you are coming from. My soul mate left me in march this year. She is My Love My Life My Everything. I just wanted to share this, so you know i genuinely do understand. All i can say is take as much time as you need to heal and live, it won't happen overnight and there is definitely no hurry to think about another fur baby now or ever. You take the time YOU need no matter what anyone else says or thinks love. I wish you all the best and thinking of you and your baby girl.