Worthless

[Guest_1055]

Hello

I am wanting to know if anyone else feels just worthless. And what they did about that feeling that creeps inside of you.

Thanks

[Guest_1055]

Ah CW 

I too am feeling exciting for you, in regards to going over to the UK, to the point I wish I was actually physically going or something. So I think I am grateful for you in sharing to us all about it. But I would like to go as a tiny blue heart, inside your blue pencil case. So if you need a hug, you could simply unzip your pencil case. Are you a huggy family then? Because if you are, it probably will feel so good for you to be in your mum's arms. 

I did take your advice the other day, about coming out of the bedroom, but I cannot remember what I actually did. Anyway I did appreciate your advice. 

Have you been walking on the beach lately? Or has it been too hot to do that? I have heard of pulled pork, you mentioned a few posts back now, that you were hoping to cook it. I don't even know what it actually is, so I will "goggle" it, because you have got me curious now.

I do hope you are having a good day, at your work, well I am guessing that you are working today.......

I am not sure of what else to say and yes I know you have been struggling a bit, and I wish to take it all away. But I think I have said that before. I also am cautious of saying too much about it, in case in makes it harder for you or something.

 You have mentioned those colouring books........I have one of those colouring books as well, I was given to me, as a gift for Christmas. On Christmas day, when others were resting, I just sat at the table and coloured for a while, listening to this soundtrack from the movie" Ladies in Lavender". It was pretty calming.......

Hugs

Shelley xx

[Guest_1055]

Hey Wayne,

Please don't be sad, that I am struggling. I will hang on tight and I will be OK. Thankyou so much for caring about me and the extra big hug and everything.

Shelley xx

[Guest_1055]

Hey Sherie

Just wondering what you are up to?

Shelley xx

[Guest_5218]

Hi there Shell.  Well actually I was thinking of you, and wondering how you were doing today, and whether you made it to the Cafe last night to listen to some of the music.  And then, up sprang your name!  So here I am.

Today I have been doing just the usual household chores, like a load of washing, some gardening, some grocery shopping.  And because we are heading off to visit family on Wednesday I also went to Bing Lee to get a couple of late Xmas gifts for my brother and his wife. And a couple of extra bits and pieces for my Dad for Xmas.  But I now have gifts sorted for everyone.  I am working tomorrow and again on Tuesday, and then we are off.

How about you, have you been out and about today?

Sherie xx

[Guest_1055]

Yes I did pop in to the cafe last night for a small time, because I was interested to see how one would write about a show being performed in a forum. I didn't really listen much, as it's not really my thing. You all sounded like you were excited and having fun. And I have always like Scotchfinger, from his very first post, as he caused my heart to be light and removed some of the heaviness that was in there, and made me smile on the inside.

Did you pick up any new year sale bargains in Bing Lee then?

I wish I had the motivation to do household chores, but I am finding it a struggle at the moment. There is someone in this household who is washing a few dishes every now and then, and they have put on a couple of loads of washing, so I should be thankful for them, in doing that. But overall this house is messy and the task of cleaning it is overwhelming.

I have been out of the house a little bit, I went walking and I have been grocery shopping, but it required a lot of effort, and I found myself crying a little in the fruit and vegetables section in Woolworths. I did go to the movies a couple of days ago, just so I could dwell on something else, besides myself.

OK I will click on the red "post this reply button" now, as I don't know what else to say.

Hug

Shelley

[Guest_5218]

Good to hear from you Shelley.  Yes I did pick up a bargain at Bing Lee - an electic fry pan for my sister in law.  So she will be happy, as I know their current one is not working as it should.  It just doesnt get as hot as it should any more.  I'm glad that while you are unable to do household chores, that someone else there is.  Better than everything building up and making things even worse.  If I were there, I would help you get things in order.  Honestly I would.  And I would feel good doing it for you.  

I read a couple of days ago about you going to the movies, it was a kids movie if I recall correctly.  Kids movies are the best.  I love them.  In fact on Christmas morning I watched the modern version of Cinderella, and then Christmas night I watched ExtraTerrestrial.  One of my all time favourites though is Swiss Family Robinson.

Sorry to hear that you had a little cry in the fruit and vege section of Woolies.  Does it bother you if anyone notices?  It does me, and I cover it up as best I can, or disappear quickly whenever it happens.

Hope you have a nice evening Shelley, and I will check in on you again later.  Hugs to you too.

Sherie xx

[Guest_1055]

I have watched that modern Cinderella movie and The Swiss Family Robinson one as well.

When I cried in the supermarket it didn't bother me at all this time. I just didn't care if anyone noticed me or not. I have felt self conscious before though and know what it is like to want to get out of there.

I have now been in this bedroom for a while now, alternating from the chair to the bed. I am now trying to force myself to go on out and prepare some dinner, because it is now  about 8:15pm. As I go out, I will try to not see the stuff on the floor, or the stuff left in the bathroom.

Thankyou for the offer to help me organise this house, I really appreciate it. Are you good at that then, cleaning and organizing?

OK bye

Shelley xxx

PS Have a good day at work tomorrow and thank you......

[Guest_5218]

Thats good that it didnt bother you if anybody saw you crying.  

I wouldn't say I was good at cleaning, although when I set my mind to it, I do knuckle down and do it well. When I do something it bothers me if I dont do it well. I am a very organised person, and thats partly thanks to the OCD.  Everything in its place, and not a hair out of place, that sort of thing.  So my house very rarely gets untidy.

What did you organise for dinner tonight?  I just threw together ham and salad, but hubby likes that, so he was happy.  I am heading off to bed shortly, hopefully for a good nights sleep.  Hope you do too.  

Sherie xx

[Guest_1055]

It must be good to be somewhat organised, I am not naturally organised at all. But I do like to live in a home, that is organised. I have tried to bring some sense of order to my place, but like I said it doesn't come naturally, I tend to get very distracted and scattered or something. The best place that I have ordered is my herbs and spices drawer. Before I fixed it, loose herbs were all mixed up, and flowing from packets. So I bought some little glass jars, that are big enough to fit a teaspoon or tablespoon in. Stuck on labels, and wrote in clear black writing, the contents of each one. I love that drawer, and whenever I start to feel scattered, I pull open the drawer and just look at all the neatly lined up jars.

I don't know much about OCD. Is it hard to live with?

I ended up cooking up some satay chicken kebabs that were already marinated. So that was pretty quick, and a green salad, with a dressing on it. The dishes are still out there now. I don't like waking up to a not clean kitchen. But making the dinner was the best I could do at present. 

Good night then.

Shelley xxx

[Guest_1055]

Hey Sherie....... I have already posted a previous reply to your last post, so hopefully it will pop up at same stage.

xx