Worthless

[Guest_1055]

Hello

I am wanting to know if anyone else feels just worthless. And what they did about that feeling that creeps inside of you.

Thanks

[Guest_5218]

Hi Shelley Anne.  Remember me - from the Chat thread?  Nice to run into you again.  How are you travelling?

I often read threads which you have posted onto.  You come across as such a caring and compassionate woman, always helping others.  You seem to know just the right thing to say or do for the circumstances.  Even when you dont actually say anything, your hugs alone must give plenty of comfort to those who receive them.   ( :

I'm not sure that I am doing the right thing here by gatecrashing someone's thread for this purpose?  

But Shelley Anne, I just wanted to say 'thankyou' from the bottom of my heart. I know many people have been comforted and inspired by you and your support.  

Please dont forget to take care of yourself as well. 

Sherie xx

[Guest_4987]

Hi Shelley,

Thank you and Kaz for all your kind words, I have managed to halt the slide down for the moment as we know it's not easy but I keep trying, hey if you don't succeed at first just keep trying.

On a lighter note i'm so glad you found Shaun and his mob, i do like the way they don't speak it's all about actions for me they just crack me up with there antics.

I look forward to sunrise tomorrow as I will try and get out early and do my stuff as there is plenty to do.

Thank you Shelley and Kaz again for for all your support and kind words, feel'n like hug'n you all.

Wayne 

[Kazzl]

Wayne I am so pleased to hear you're surfacing again. It's a good feeling eh? Hope you've had a good day today. 

Hiya Shelley anne - hugs to you too hun. What a lovely group of people here.

Hi Sherie and The Count. Hope everyone is feeling strong today.

 Cheers

Kaz

[Guest_1055]

Hey Sherie,

Yes I certainly do remember you. We both were not too good at small talk and we both admitted that fact. I think I might need lessons in small talk, if there is such a thing. I am not sure about you, but when I have tried to well.....engage in small talk, I always sound false. Like I am being someone that I am not.

I am so glad you found me here Sherie. Hug to you

In this thread discussions have been on feeling worthless, that sounds a bit negative doesn't it.? But anyway so, so many people that post here on Beyond Blue say they feel just plain worthless. Another discussion  raised by Shaun the Sheep has been on " over thinking things". Which I think is a very valid topic because it appears lots of people that have depression and anxiety tend to do that has well.

In answer to your question, about how I am.... Well I believe that I am OK, and  please be re assured I will take care of myself. Thank you so much for your concern, you sound like you have such a mother's heart.

Thankyou also for all your kind words to me, I appreciate it and you Sherie. And I am hoping that you are getting along OK.

With love and many hugs

Shelley xxx

[Guest_1055]

Hey Wayne, 

I'm so ,so glad you are feeling better. So thankful.

Ah..... the sunrise, that is a beautiful time of the day, when everything is sort of waking up. Have a good day tomorrow, Wayne and doggie Lucy, looking after your sheep and other stuff.

Good night

Shelley xxxx

[Guest_1055]

Do you really like birds then Kaz? I keep looking at your cockatoo here, I love how there are so many types of birds, and how they all have different beaks, according to what they actually eat. Way cool......

Have you felt the feeling of worthlessness Kaz? Do you mind me asking? 

OK, good night to you as well.

Shelley xxxxx

[Guest_5218]

Hi Shelley Anne. Thanks for your trademark hug  ( :

Yes I know the theme of this thread, I was drawn to it for its title.  I can also relate to Shaun The Sheep about over thinking things, as I find I often do that too.  In fact I am currently doing exactly that over a job interview coming up next week.  I need the job, but now I'm freaking out about it and overthinking.

I'm glad to hear that you believe that you are okay at the moment, as I guess that is the main thing.  If we think we are doing okay then it probably shows on the outside as well, and our loved ones dont worry so much.

You say that I sound like I have a 'mothers heart'.  Thats not actually the case.  I dont have any children of my own, although I would have liked to have.  I got married when I was 37 and my husband already had a 20yo son and 15yo daughter from his first marriage.  The deal before I married him was that there would be no more kids.  But I have always got on well with both step-kids and, although their real Mum is still around, I have seen a lot of them as they grew up, especially my step-daughter.  Their Mum is actually a really nice woman and we get on very well whenever we meet through family gatherings like weddings, births, etc.  So that makes easier. Both kids now have children of their own, and I am treated the same as their 'real' grandparents.  So I'm actually very lucky, and have 6 grandkids ranging in age from 16yo to just turned 3yo.

But getting back to the topic of this particular thread.  Yes there are times that I do feel really worthless, and the last 3 or 4 months I have felt that way a lot.  

In August my brother was involved in a freak car accident which resulted in the tragic death of his 11yo daughter and spinal injuries for my brother.  Happily my brother will eventually recover, at least physically.  But it just seems so dreadfully unfair that my little niece who was such a sweet and talented little girl, with such a lot to live for, should be taken away like that.  I guess not having kids of my own, I have always been very close to my niece and nephews.  I had been talking to her only hours before the car accident. So its been really hard. 

And then I lost my part time job in September when the business I worked for was sold.  I actually like working as it makes me feel valuable and useful, and I know I am good at what I do.  So I find the loss of my job extremely difficult.  

So yeah, my life lacks purpose at present.

Sherie xx

[Guest_4987]

Hi Shelley,

 Really hope this post finds you and everybody well and happy today.

I am feeling so so worthless and depressed, yesterday I thought i was a little better but I must have been having myself on big time. I would do anything to not be in this state thats why I am posting this as it helps me to talk about it.

My self worth is crashing, not enough energy at the moment to try and keep my depression in check, I could just roll into a ball and forget it (i wish).

Every thing I think about is confusing me and the worst things come to mind, I really need to wake up and put more effort into what I'am trying to do here.

Wayne

[Guest_5218]

Hi Shaun The Sheep,

Really sorry to hear that your self worth is low along with your energy.  I guess that goes hand in hand anyway.  I see from your previous posts that you are a sheep farmer?  What sort of sheep do you run - ie meat or wool?  My husband and I used to run a small farm up until about 6 years ago.  We ran superfine wool merino's.  It can be pretty constant and hard work at times.  Being an ex minor you are more than likely in either WA or QLD?

Being on your own without seeing other people for a couple of weeks at a time can be somewhat trying for some people.  Do you get lonely out there?  I used to love the solitute of farm life actually.  I never got lonely, and I used to love just taking my little dog for a walk along the creek or up into the hills.  Beautiful!

I see you have a little dog.  What breed is Lucy?  Dogs are great company arent they?  Always so happy to see you, its great.  I love my mini foxie to bits, and really dont know what I would do without her.  She's 5kgs full of love, affection and fun.  Do you have a sheep dog as well (ie a kelpie or border collie)?   Or do you do most of your farm work from the back of a quad bike?  Be careful with those...  So many accidents on them!

Okay Wayne, nice meeting you.  Perhaps another time?  Meanwhile I hope you start to feel a little better. One day at a time hey?  Look after yourself ..............  

Sherie xx

[Guest_4987]

Hi Sherie,

Thank you for your post it has kept me away from the negative thinking thing for a while. I run meat sheep a shedding type so they don't need as much work as woolies still a bit of work required. I also like farm life and normally I don't get lonely but struggling at this time, Lucy is a scottie and I don't have a sheep dog or quad I muster the mob by foot as my mob are well behaved so that makes it possible. I am no greenie but I try to limit my  footprint by not having a tractor which would sit in the shed most of the time, I use a contractor to sow, harvest and bail winter feed for my animals, the farm here is off grid solar powered which I think is a good thing for our world.

I was always based in NSW but was FIFO to most states and a few other countries but i must admit i am over all the travel and on a good day love being home.

I totally agree with you about walking around your property I just love a good walk with my Lucy so beautiful in the mornings and evenings why am I so depressed I will be making it my mission to do just that in the morning.

Nice to meet you too Sherie thank you so much.

Wayne