Whats sleep

[7891]

Hi everyone new to this, 

Feeling very down lost and empty 

All mixed emotions really,

Lost my dad/best friend my everything on 7/5/22 still feels like yesterday to me lost him to a flesh-eating bacterial infection that I witnessed his death, I can not sleep when I do i awake up and down all night long or lay there for hours because all I dream, think about and see is my dad and the things I had seen happen to him I can not get it out my head or stop thinking about it no matter what I try it's made me paranoid been having bad anxiety attacks it's making me angry have bad mood swings sad an sometimes just feel nothing like empty no energy don't know how to explain the feelings that come an go 

[Sophie_M]

Hi 7891,

First of all: Welcome and thank you for posting to the Beyond Blue forums. We can hear you’re going through a difficult time, and we wanted to let you know that we’re here for you.   

We are so sorry to hear about your loss of your dad. We have no doubt he was an amazing person and clearly someone very dear to you. We hope that you have someone that you can talk to and some support during this tough time. 

What you are feeling is valid - Grief has no set pattern, and everyone experiences grief in different ways. It’s also important that you take care of yourself and reach out to others.   You can call our counsellors at any time, on 1300 22 4636. They can help you talk this through and will also be able to help you plan what's next so that you have that support in place. We'd also recommend talking to Griefline, on 1300 845 745 (6am to midnight AEST every day): https://griefline.org.au/ 

Another option is Blue Knot. You can talk to Blue Knot about this on 1300 657 380, every day between 9am-5pm (AEST). Their counsellors work with people who have experienced complex trauma. They also have some resources on their website which could be useful to visit, particularly the pages on Survivors Self Care.  

The forums are a safe and supportive space, so we want to thank you for sharing here.   

Kind regards,   

Sophie M 

[yggdrasil]

Hey 7891,

Thanks so much for posting on here. I'm so sorry to hear about your father. While mourning is obviously normal, there are a few things that helped me cope with cyclic thoughts, emotions and behaviour associated with traumatic past experiences. One was schema therapy. This therapy really helped me address cyclic patterns of thought, emotions and behaviour. Basically it involves writing heaps about your past, thinking about how these past experiences relate to the patterns you want to change, and trying to identify the early warning signs leading into these patterns. There's lots online about this therapy, and most psychologists are aware of it.

Another thing was skateboarding. Because there's a risk factor, you have to really be in "the moment" to avoid falling off. This really forces the cyclic thoughts and emotions out of your body and mind. Have you ever tried an activity like this? Boxing classes, martial arts, acro-yoga, contact sport, roller derby - anything with a small, controllable risk factor to force you out of your head.

The final thing was spirituality. I've always been a very non-spiritual person so this was very foreign to me. However, I found the rituals very grounding, and helpful breaking out of my head. 

I hope the above are helpful in some way. Thinking of you and wishing you the best over the weekend.

yggdrasil