Today I started crying and I don't know why

[Gaymer]

Today, I got home from shopping with my Mum and I sat down on my couch and started crying. I don't know why I was crying. But I felt really sad. And for the past few weeks, I have had this overwhelming feeling of sadness following me around, even though I know deep down I have nothing to be sad about.

I was walking around the shopping centre and I felt exhausted. My eyes felt heavy, like I had either over slept or under slept. I guess you could call it groggy. I just didn't feel myself. And I don't feel like myself writing this. I am normally a pretty upbeat, funny, social kind of guy, but lately I feel like it's been all an act - like I am keeping up a persona in front of other people in order not to show my true self.

Like everyone, I have a long history - mostly things I don't want to write on an online forum, but needless to say, some of it was pretty heavy and hard to deal with too the point I feel like I haven't actually dealt with or processed some of it at all. Or maybe I am just making excuses for myself again. I am really good at that, apparently.

I know there are far worse things happening to people across the planet, my problems pale in comparison. And to be honest, I don't even know if they are problems or not. I guess I am just really confused. Why would I just start crying? Why do I feel so tired all the time? Why do I feel so anxious when I go to a nightclub with my friends? Are they my friends? Do they even like me? Sometimes I feel like they do, and other times I feel like a third, fourth, fifth wheel. Like I am physically there, but I am not really present in their eyes.

I guess I just needed to put how I am feeling into words, and thought the best place to do that would be a website like this one. I don't really know what I am expecting to get out of this post, but it is about time I started vocalising how I've been feeling because I feel like I've been bottling some things up for a while now and I don't know what I am supposed to do about it.

[ro63]

Hi Gaymer,So glad you are able to talk about how you are feeling ,it's so important and tough to talk about ,so you are very couragous to open up, it took me years of carrying around so much stress and pressure ,it took me bursting into tears at work to make me seek help (which was on a building site so wasn't much empathy there) and am so glad I did. It might be worth talking to your Gp as a starting point ,if that's something that doesn't sit well with you please use these forums to get things off your chest you will find some wonderfull people here with plenty of experience and are happy to help ,Don't beat yourself up about event's which you can't control and remember that, this is a time in which people of all ages are under more pressure than any generation in history. So don't feel you have to face it alone ,Best Regards Ross.

[MsPurple]

Hi Gaymer and welcome to the forums.

It sounded like you were struggling to write your post but I am glad you did. We are here to offer support, allow people to vent and to offer guidance. please note no forum user is a professional (except dr kim), just keep that in mind

I am like you. I have a long history of mental health issues that I sometimes don't want to discuss on the forums and I choose not to share a lot of those things. It is however good to open up and get some support from users. You can feel free to share as much and as little as you like.

Have you considered talking to your doctor about this? I know when I was younger I stopped going then I went back as an adult and I found it way more beneficial. Maybe keep an open mind.

Hope this helps. And hope to see you around on the forums.

[Jessicatherese94]

Hi Gaymer, firstly it's really great you're talking about your feelings. You're totally right, it's much better to discuss it than to bottle up. If you feel like something is a problem it is, don't compare your problems to others. What you are going through is important and valid. What do you think would be the best way to manage how you're feeling? For some people it's seeing a professional (even a few sessions can help) or writing down your thoughts. If you continue to feel this way for a long period of time it might be a good idea to consult your GP. Like what Ross said above you are not alone in this. As someone who has also experienced sadness and pain I'm right here with you. Feeling sad and not knowing why sounds like a symptom of depression, and the good thing is that there is plenty of help available for you, and that 40% of all people will experience it in their lifetime. Would love to hear how you're going over the next few days. Jess