Need help transforming my life

[RoyBerlin]

I've recently turned 40, and I been in a job/industry that I am no longer happy with. My options seem to limited as I have a criminal conviction from a few years back. Every employer seems to want a history check, and I understand that if I was an employer with a choice, I would hire the one without the conviction. I've been with my current company long before I got into trouble, and my employer is aware of it and is happy to keep me employed. However, since I work alone, and live alone, I'm finding it difficult to meet people and improve myself. The consequences of my actions nearly 8 years ago are very much now becoming a reality. It's giving me severe depression and I feel like I can't move out of this job where I have no future. It's quite overwhelming. Any advice I would appreciate.

[Croix]

Dear RoyBerlin~

I'd like to wish you a warm welcome here at the Forum, a good starting point.

Firstly I think you are right to see your current job as your best chance of employment, as you say some prospective employers will hesitate to take on someone who has an adverse legal history. 

It may not be an ideal job but it is something.

As you work alone and live alone I guess the easiest of the two to alter is living alone. If you do nothing then I would think the same situation would simply continue, so it might be time to think about what you can do outside work time.

I would suggest you consider volunteering. There a huge number of different fields, from citizen science to animal exercise, from singing to cooking.  This has several advantages, the first being that generally the people there are more relaxed about past history, you get to meet new people, and you discover things  you'd never ever thought of -and can enjoy.

Try out several and see what suits, 40 is quite young enough to do anything, it simply means you have expereince and the wisdom that comes from it.

If you would like to let us know how you get on that would be great.

Croix

[RoyBerlin]

Hi Croix,

Thank you for taking the time to respond and share some of your thoughts on my situation.

Volunteering sounds like a great idea, I had never given it a thought.

My job is giving me severe burnout, as it's been a casual job (while still working full--time hours) for nearly 14 years. As a consequence, I haven't had a week off in nearly five years. I can afford to take time off, but there are no opportunities for me to get away because my employers don't have the trained staff to cover me. While this is my employers problem, I also feel that if I go away for any period of length, there might not be a job for me when I get back. This is how the company I work for operates, they keep most of their workforce on casual. I get no support from higher-up, we are not looked after at all. But that's nothing unusual with private enterprise. My immediate superior is himself overworked, and can't spend much time worrying about me. 

There might come a day where I just don't show up to work, although that could burn a serious bridge. But I feel like I'm no good to them in my current state, I don't know how much longer I can just keep 'soldiering on'. We all have bills to pay, and I need to keep this up to keep the lights on.

I have been applying for other jobs in the meantime, hopefully something I can do can come from that. I might fail if I leave, but I know I'm failing if I stay.

[Croix]

Dear Roy~

No wonder you are burnt out after 14 years full time wihtout any of the benefits of being a full-time employee. Add to htat the worry if you take leave you might be replaced - yuck.  An organisation I know has just been though this and there is a possibility your company is doing something wrong in not making you full time after a set period.

I am not a lawyer and so I may be wrong, however it might be something worth looking into if you have not already. I think they went to the Fair Work Commission for advice. I"ve been in contact with them on an unrelated matter and they were very helpful.

I can see what you say in that you might fail if you leave but you will fail if you stay. That's putting more pressure on you and is a real worry. I guess it is not unreasonable that you will eventually get another job, however in the meantime maybe it is a case of trying to help yourself cope with your current circumstances.

Can I suggest you set a regular time of day when you do something you know you will like, it can be important to have a pleasant tihng to look forward to each day. I've no idea of your interests so can't suggest any to you, in my own case it is reading and I read a chapter or more every night, and it is a break from the day and all it's hassles.

I would like to know what you decide and how you get on if you felt like coming back here

Good luck

Croix