ls it healthier to work and live while having depression , or is there a centerlink disability pension, and if so , which is healthier ?
Hey people .
l've met people on all kinds of Centerlink disability things over the yrs but can you get onto something due to depression ?
But then as in the title , maybe it's actually healthier for you to actually be out there in life and working and functioning ? - bloody hate that word but it's the only description l could think of . So what does everyone do , and which do they find is better ?
At one stage through a really bad patch l just didn't feel l could work or cope. So l asked Centerlink they told me l'd have to see the gp , get referrals ,go and get assessments and all kinds of other things can't remember exact details , but it was a nightmare l'd worry that l'd spend wks or mths putting myself through and then maybe get nothing anyway. But ok l'll just start with the gp and see where that goes first. And they told me it could get me 3mths , what, 3mths, but then l'd have to do it all again to get an extension or another 3mths and then again , and again , or some rubbish can't remember the exact details but it sounded far worse than the alternative and just struggling on to me.
Well, what a useless stressing , draining effort that was , here's a grown man in the mess l was in felt like l just couldn't even go on let alone cope or do real life , work , pressures buttt, saw a gp yet all he said was l'll give you a certificate for 2 days off . Two days, wt - to keep it polite here, 2 days l needed 2 wks just from the stress of dealing with him that once , without adding in my real problems. He wouldn't even give me a referral for the next step. Acted like there was nothin wrong with me meanwhile l'm wondering if l wanted to go on l mean that's the state l was in.
Centerlink also wanted me to enroll with a job agency and so here l was having to tell some 19yr old girl with a button and computer and the power to send me packing with no damn clue how l was or living , threatening to stop any payment if l didn't jump through their hoops too in the meantime, it was insanity .And all that took about 2 wks of stress driving sitting round waiting and explaining myself over and over and what little money l had at the time on petrol , it was a nightmare and left me in worse shape than l started.
Hi LL , yeah been awhile.
Glad your still at it, sounds good considering how you felt back earlier with it , nice going eh.
Me , been a weird yr work wise . Going into a new strategy this yr , from 7 or 8 job last yr from memory give or take , maybe 12 the yr before , down to only 2 of this yr now l just decided last few wks, was gonna do 3.But better paying jobs, so less work.
Anyway just finished the first , sat on backside way too much earlier haha, should've been done mths ago. And now just starting the second. l was really looking forward to the second job so there ya go bit of life yet and l'm really enjoying it so far.
Next yr if this yr works out, l wanna tone back even more , and stick to only 2 jobs but up a notch again to better quality jobs so with less labour , we see .
At any rate , still plodding along for now haha.
Thanks for dropping in.
Had some great news through the wk work n house wise with the issue from late last yr not working out and so me needing to keep working for who knows how long yet.
lt's looking better now and those things might work out a lot lot sooner now, maybe even by the end of the yr to early next yr. l wouldn't be loaded by any means but l don't need much and if it works out l could get by with just doing a little bit on the side now and then to bring in some extra money here and there, and be pretty right.
l've hardly done anything this yr so far work wise just haven't been able to find the mojo. So things have been really tight but although l can't count any chickens yet , pretty hard not getting exited about this new development so for now we see l suppose but it's looking much much better..
Hiya LL and thanks.
Yeah look tbh , l lit up like a Christmas tree after the call, which l'd been putting of for 4mths bc l just couldn't face another let down butttttt, l got a very very nice surprise. Ha, for once.
Yeah tbh , in many ways it's a dream job actually. l can chop and change or modify all of it, what l earn , hrs , days or mths l wanna work, any which way really, type of jobs l take on, pretty well the whole lot really. l use to have to work much harder but l'm getting clever haha.
Hope yours is going well.
l've finally started the second job for the yr .
Normally l'd had done 4 or 5 by now . But l am really enjoying this second job , but at the same time l can feel it within myself that it's not something l'll be able to keep feeling and doing , l just got lucky with this particular one that it just so happens to be a really interesting job and the sort l'd normally enjoy so that's just tying me over for now. The thought of next yr though , or the yr after or after , makes me sick and l know l won't be able to keep it going. l'm also dealing with the business end of the last one l just finished now too , and l'm really struggling with that stuff just had enough of it.
Good news is that good news l had earlier might even make it possible to not have to even bother with next yr now as things are looking. That's by no means certain yet though but if not then l know now l'll have to come up with another idea.
A most stressful morning and things l just can't cope with lately , hence this whole thread really.
But , it's been the business end of getting the first job of the yr out this last 6wks. 6 wks and all different to normally this time bc of lockdowns. This customer was very very picky and finicky , they're the worst possible kind. What a morning, and on a Saturday no less, l tried to keep the stressy areas for wkdays normally , need wkends calm.
But bc of lock downs he'd put a 4k deposit of the job 6wks ago but couldn't pick it up until this morning. Well , this one being the first job out for the yr where as there's normally be at least a few out by now, l've been behind in bills. So l've blown most of the 4k waiting , paining them down which means if he's not happy when he finally does turn up l'm obligated to give him and agree amount back- all spent.
He turns up picky and scanning everything , on the phone, sending pictures to someone, even had his Ipad out for something no idea what , going over every mm of this 10mtr job , top bottom underneath inside outside electrics every possible thing and then some. Most people just take a quick look , orrr yeah , next minute they're transferring payment and gone in 15. Over 2hrs he was here , l'd already resigned to the idea and planning that he wasn't happy and wouldn't take it.
Anyway , low and behold, after all that , the job somehow, somehow , passed his bs, and finally we were in doing the paperwork and payments. My God , what a relief.
Couldn't take another one of those.
l wish l could just stop the active and must do sides of life right here, l just wish. So many things to do , l hate it and it's so hard mentally. l've always had lots of things and projects too going on and l love all the sorts of things l'm talking about. But l've realized lately l'm still committing myself to things , that l've been doing all my life and enjoyed once had the energy and interest and time for or l'd make it , and l'd do them , so many things have l done.
But this last yr or two , suddenly l'm not enjoying them anymore , nor have the energy and interest anymore , yet still in some kind of dreamland, l've gone and set myself up for them , and now, they have to be done.The yr even though work wise l've sat on my lorals , has still been huge , and my daughters still living with me, l'm drained, yet l'm still committing myself to these things and l'm pretty well time and energy wise booked out solid rest of the yr , l dunno how l'm gonna do them all , or why. Plus work.
lt always seems to be when they're done , that's been going last few yrs , but then there's more come along , and more , and when they're done, again !!!!!!
This time , when they're done though , that is def' gonna be it . End of the yr , and l will commit myself to no more.
You sound like you have A LOT on. I think you are already across this... but have you ever looked at some resources on perfectionism? I was one of those people who just kept doing and doing and doing.... and it's only when I ended up in hospital did I think "why am I doing all these things?" and "do these even make me happy?". And it turned out the answer was no.
I've now been off work and committees and all those things for the last 9 months and have gone on centrelink. It's been really hard, but I'm working through a lot of what is driving this need to "do" and the "I should" do this.
What I've found really helpful is the workbook on Perfectionism on the Centre for Clinical Interventions website (link here https://www.cci.health.wa.gov.au/Resources/Looking-After-Yourself/Perfectionism). It has made me start to realise the unhealthy drivers that fuel my need to "do".
There is also a really good book that I found - Perfectly Hidden Depression: How to Break Free from the Perfectionism That Masks Your Depression by Margaret Robinson Rutherford. I'm not going to lie, it's a really hard and uncomfortable read. But it might help you on your journey of saying no, and allowing you to start focussing on your needs.
Sending you my best,
Hi G , and thanks for the thoughts .
Why did you end up in hospital , was it all putting you under stress , were you putting yourself under stress with your ways, or related to other things and health ? No need to answer or go into the gruesomes if you'd rather not .
And also what exactly has been hard about stopping , Centerlink things , health, just a bundle of all , no purpose now, other things , or ? l think l could stop quite happily and just enjoy existing from here , for the first time in my life. But in a way , that question , does it make you happy , is soooooo obvious isn;t it , but yet often one question we don't ask ourselves , yet most important of all.
But yeah l do have a lotttta stuff on , half of l've just created myself but nah , my thing is nothing to do with perfectionism , it's a few other things, a combo. My whole life though for a start, l've loved using my hands, since l was 1 or two. Dad gave me my first tool box when l was 3 or 4, l was always making stuff. l'd build or do crazy things and took on things no one does themselves , they'd buy it, but l just couldn't resist giving it a go, it was one more thing to get my teeth into.
Well, l'm still doing it. Only last wkend l drove 3hrs ea way bought something l want to turn into something. Most people would never do it with this, they'd just but the right one. But l liked a combo so if l bought this one that had things of what l wanted, l'd work the rest and build it into what l want. l've a nasty habit of doing this crap all my life. To find it and just buy it , would give me sooooo much extra time and save soooo many headaches but no , l take the hard road, just bc for some very weird reason, l get some kind out of doing it myself.lt's a curse haha.
So l end up with crazy things l'm building or or converting often 3 or 4 of them going at once. Well l have a business too, renovating this house to sell, haven't been feeling too good and big personal things going on too, so wth take on more, and crazy things that l could just go buy. Just to put it simply.
They use to give me to answer your own question , some kind of happiness doing them, and def' a kick out of it. But these days after a lifetime of putting myself in for this rubbish, it's time l finish what l have and stop it. So that's the plan. Wish l could from this very day actually , right now , as we speak .