Life

Zee

I just feel like I have no one, and when people say that they’re there for you, they’re not. Because when u need them the most, they’re busy or they don’t have time. You try to explain to them how you feel and how scary it was dealing with it all alone, and they show they understand, then the next day it’s back to normal. I just wish I could have someone always with me that whenever I need the help I can just turn to it or go on my phone and message it to them, and keep them updating so I don’t have to constantly tell the story all over again, or tell it to a new person. But no one truely understands you, or knows the full story and I think that’s what I hate most

Tugboat

Hi

So sad to read this post. Are you able to reach out to family? Have you spoken to any counsellors on BB.

randomxx

What your wishing for is a partner and a partner in crime, or a steady counsellor, sorry to say but it's just too bigger ask of the usual other people in our lives.

l get that myself, l can't expect everyone or anyone to be weighed down with my bs every 5mins or to understand me in depth , or to have any of them del with it sometimes daily or weekly . To me that'd just be selfish of me , it's a professionals job, or the sort of thing only our closest as in our partner or if we're lucky a v good friend can deal and cope with or for places like this.

Life's hard yaknow, it's hard for everyone else too, just in different ways to ours but most people have their hands full .

If you need your car fixed you go to a mechanic , not a carpenter or just anyone.

Go easy on yourself.

rx

Zee

Hello, I have reached out to family but they don’t get it. I reached out to both my parents before, my mum assumed I was attacking her for not being a good mother, and my dad just assumes it’s all in my head and to get over it, or he will listen when I speak but makes jokes to try and cheer me up or not take me seriously, then the next day will act like it was nothing. I did speak to BB person multiple times but I feel like I can’t be helped Im scared to ask for it

Zee

It’s not that I want a partner it’s just Im tired of constantly relying on myself to make myself feel better, having to tel myself that these emotions are okay, or to ignore thay, or Dont get upset about thay u cant do anything about it. But then it gets tiring, like how long am I gonna stay here above water before I give up and drown. Life is hard for everyone else in their own ways but sometimes people don’t realise that others have it hard too, and they think everyone should be like them, get over it the same, or deal with it like how they did. And especially when they think they know how to deal with it as if it’s so easy. But overall thank you ❤️

Psychdiaries2

Hi there,

Welcome to the forums and thanks for your honesty in reaching out. I know you seek support and you've come to the right place. It's true, people sometimes don't seem to understand you and I know it's common with mental health. A lot of people who haven't really struggled with their mental health can't seem to wrap their heads around your struggles or lack the empathy to do so. I'm sorry to hear your parents don't really get you, I think it's best to not bother to talk to people about personal stuff that are just insensitive. It sucks, but by reading the posts on the forums and reaching out to counsellors myself, I have learnt that there truly are people out there going through the same things you are and it makes me feel less alone. I wonder if as you continue to spend time on here, you may feel like that too. I read you have reached out to a counsellor but are feeling scared and it's ok, I get scared too. Being vulnerable isn't easy. I think it's worth trying to keep in mind that the more you open up, the more a counsellor can help you.

I hope this helps you a bit and that you feel more content being on the forums and less alone. You can reach out on here or to a counsellor anytime.

Kind regards,

PsychDiaries

therising

Hi Zee

It's definitely challenging, to say the least, when there are people who are not there for us when we really need them to be. While they can deeply love us, sometimes they just don't know how to love us in the ways we desperately need them to. I feel for you so much at this time in your life where you face a number of challenges that are seriously testing you.

While no one outside of ourself is going to be there for us 24/7, we still have ourself. Sometimes the question can be 'How do I develop aspects of myself that are going to serve me whenever I need them?'. If you type any one of the following into Google, some tips will come up

How do I develop the sage in me
How do I develop the analyst or the problem solver in me
How do I develop my intuitive self
How do I develop the confident part of me

and the list goes on. Each element that goes toward making up who you are is there to serve you. Recognising how seriously underdeveloped they are can be the first step toward making sense of intense struggle at times.

Not sure what your inner dialogue's like but I can relate to the pessimist in me occasionally insisting 'This is never going to work' or 'Life is never going to get better'. I can relate to the way my inner stresser can set off my nervous system while announcing 'That's way too stressful. There's no way you're going to be able to cope with that' or some part of me that insists at times 'You're absolutely hopeless'. Each part comes with emotional elements, which can also be challenging. These are definitely not the parts of us we want to be relying on. The problem is that we may have been tapping into them for so long to the point where they just naturally come up, without any effort.

On the effort side of things, it can take a lot of work and practice to seriously begin tapping into the sage in us or the wiser non judgemental part of ourself, for example. For a start, opening your mind to wonder (instead of jumping to the wrong conclusion) can definitely have an emotional impact: 'I wonder what this feeling is really about', as opposed to 'I'm never going to feel better'. One of those thoughts opens us up, whereas the other brings us down. It may pay to consider that you're an absolute natural at developing parts of yourself but just haven't been shown how to do it in relatable ways. Personally, I've found completely unrelatable ways (when it comes to self development) just don't work all that well.🤗