I'm so tired, 9 years of seeking treatment and it feels like I've gotten nothing done

44Max44

For the past 9 years I've been seeking treatment for whatsoever is wrong with me (since I turned 18 and could start seeking treatment on my own), for years my doctors just said I had anxiety and depression, prescribed me some anti-depressants, and didn't think of looking any further into it. I've been suffering my whole life and never knew why, pretty much always anxious and depressed, so I thought the doctor's were right. But only very recently was I diagnosed for Autism, as well as ADHD a couple of years before that. After getting diagnosed I thought "great, I will finally get the support I need and can actually start do something with my life", but it's just been more of the same, more going around in circles, more huge wait times and appointments I can't afford.
I'm unable to work because of these reasons, so I've been trying to get on a disability pension through centerlink (for the past 7 years actually, for different reasons), but Centerlink won't grant me the disability payment because (according to the Centerlink employee that talked to me) "haven't tried enough treatments yet"......... you'd imagine how that made me feel after 9 years of treatment. What else do they want me to do? To seek treatment, I need money.... and to get money, I need the disability pension, because I can't work...... like seriously, what am I meant to do?
It really feels like I've been taking 2 steps forward and 1 step back through this entire process. I just want to get this pension so I can focus on improving myself. I'm so sick and tired of going in circles. You'd think after spending multiple thousands of dollars on seeking diagnoses for ASD/ADHD that it would go smoothly. How many more thousands of dollars do I need to spend? How else can I possibly convince them that I am need of this payment? I have been literally rotting at home for close to a decade. I can't take it much longer.

Eagle Ray

Dear 44Max44,

I'm really sorry to hear of your situation. I get it when you have multiple issues going on that make it so hard for you, and then the cost of therapy and treatment are expensive and not affordable, yet Centrelink is requiring you to have more treatment.

My guess is that your relatively young age may have something to do with it as well. I've heard they don't grant it as readily to a young person, like they expect they need to live more life first and somehow demonstrate they cannot work through a longer period of adulthood not working. But I know that makes no sense when you really aren't going okay and are stuck in the position you are in and have been in that situation for 9 years. I am on the DSP which was granted to me relatively recently. I am 51 now and have a long history of employment but mostly part time due to my medical conditions. I eventually completely deteriorated, mentally and physically. I have been through the full ringer of many years of treatment for both medical and psychological support, and I think that helped my application. They definitely rely a lot on the reports from doctors and psychologists where the impairment tables are assessed, plus the more history behind you documenting your case the more it helps. So I think still being young makes it hard.

I am not sure yet if you have been with an employment agency, but you would be eligible to be with a disability employment agency where you continue to be paid JobSeeker. Their conditions are much less demanding than a regular employment agency. I was with one in the couple of years prior to applying for the DSP. This helped a lot because it showed I was trying to get back to work. They actually wrote a letter for my application which covered me for the job capacity side of my situation. It would be a bit of a painful process, but if you did that for a year or two and are still in the same position, then it would strengthen your case. You would be working with a job consultant who would be trying to support you into employment with the limitations you have. I had 3 different consultants and the quality of them varied a lot, in terms of how they worked with me. But if you really can't function it's like eventually they see it and then that kind of backs up your case. It's kind of absurd in a way, but that's what I had to go through to demonstrate my limitations. I wanted to go back to work, but my system just kept not being able to, and now I at least had that evidence.

Have you also considered NDIS support? It is a different kind of support in that it is more about supporting you in daily living rather than a pension. In some cases you may be able to get support in relation to therapy sessions, though this is not a given and depends on whether you can demonstrate that your conditions require therapy for you to function in daily life. NDIS is just another angle in case that would be any help. There are also disability advocacy bodies you could call up and discuss your situation with and see if they have any ideas.

Actually, what I am thinking now too is they might only be counting your treatment from the Autism and ADHD diagnoses. So even though you have been doing treatment for anxiety and depression as well for longer, perhaps they are only assessing you against the Autism and ADHD? Have you actually previously submitted an application for DSP and what conditions were on it? If your treating practitioners only itemised the Autism and ADHD and the recent diagnoses, that could be a factor in Centrelink's feedback about you needing to try more treatments.

I'm not sure if any of that is any help. Do you have a GP and/or psychologist or psychiatrist you have seen for a while? Basically someone who knows your story for at least a couple of years or more and can give a fuller picture of your level of impairment would help. I know it is such an arduous process but I found I just had to keep jumping through hoops until it became clear I wasn't going to be able to meet the 15 hours per week work minimum which is what makes you eligible for DSP, combined with the impairment tables.

Take care and feel free to let us know how you go,

Eagle Ray

44Max44

Thank you for your reply, to answer some questions:

Yes I am currently seeking NDIS support, but like most things it has been a very long and tedious process with a lot of waiting involved, but I am pretty confident that I should be eligible for it, it's just a matter of going through the process now.

Yes I am a relatively young age and I do think that plays a role in why I have been denied the DSP, but what really confuses me is that my friend, who is younger than me and as far as I know has had the same amount of treatment if not less, was approved for the DSP many years ago when he was something like 22... his impairment is on around the same level as mine. It's making me think that maybe it's just luck of the draw, and it depends on the mood of the DSP worker you get, because I don't understand why he would be eligible many years ago but I'm still somehow not eligible now.

Yes I have applied for DSP multiple times before this, initially it was for what I thought was just major anxiety and depression, but I now know is related to Autism. All applications were denied before I even got a phone call, except for my latest which I got a phone call for and I was told I needed to seek more treatment before I would be eligible. At least that's progress I guess? They aren't immediately casting me aside now.

'Do you have a GP and/or psychologist or psychiatrist you have seen for a while?'
Unfortunately, no. At my local GP I bounced between doctors because I had a hard time finding one I liked, and when I finally found one I liked, they ended up being no help, just thinking some anti-depressants would fix all my problems... so I've recently moved to a different GP that I plan to stick with. Same deal with psychologists/psychiatrists, I've bounced around between a lot trying to find one I like, but never had a consistent one.

To be completely honest with you, I'm not even the one paying for these treatments, because no way would I ever be able to. My centerlink payments mostly go towards rent, and what I have left over isn't nearly enough to pay for psychologists/psychiatrists, so my parents have been paying for the treatment, and I feel really really shitty about that. My parents aren't rich, they can't afford this stuff either, but they want me to get the treatment I need. But this just makes me feel like a burden to them, which is why I just want the process to be over so I am no longer a burden. My Mum already works her ass off every day and is getting old, so I don't want her to work any harder than she has to. I just feel so guilty for even being in this position in the first place.

But at least I have some good news; I saw a Psychiatrist today and had them sign off on my Autism assessment, so my diagnoses is finally 'official', whereas before it wasn't (because it was just a regular psychologist that did the assessment), so I'm hoping that helps move things along.

Thank you again for the reply, I notice that you were the person who replied to my earlier post I made a few months back when I was going through a similar issue, so I really appreciate you taking the time to reply.

Eagle Ray

Dear 44Max44,

That is great you are currently seeking NDIS support. There is another participant on these forums with an Autism diagnosis who has been able to use NDIS funding for therapy, so I am hoping that you will be able to as well. Then this hopefully will go towards another future DSP application to demonstrate your needs in that area.

With regard to your friend who was able to go onto the DSP a few years ago, from what I understand it has become increasingly strict with regard to applications getting through. He may have applied just before things got a lot tighter. I know they have the impairment tables now which is a measure I don't think they had in the past, so that would make it more difficult for some applicants depending how the medical reports are interpreted against those tables. In the past I'm aware that some people just had their GP write a letter and that was enough, but it's definitely stricter now with more hurdles to get over. It could be a bit arbitrary based on the assessor but I don't know all the details of everything they do in the assessment.

Yes, I would say the fact that you got a phone call this time with the latest application is a good sign. Plus the meeting with the psychiatrist and formalising of the Autism diagnosis will also help. You can provide documentation from the psychiatrist which will definitely count as strong evidence for the application.

I completely hear you about trying to find a GP and psychologist who are the right fit. I have found that is really important both in making any progress and also in getting support for something like the DSP. I almost thought my GP wasn't going to get around to doing his report which he took weeks to complete and I wasn't feeling confident about it. He did complete it in the end in a simplified way, but it was really my psychologist's report that provided the information Centrelink most wanted such as how my daily life is affected. I am wondering if you have been able to research psychologists who specialise in Autism and ADHD, or AuDHD as it is now often called? Most importantly you need to find someone you feel a connection with. I have found that connection to be the most critical thing in establishing a relationship with a therapist and doing meaningful work. Unfortunately it can really take a while sometimes to find the right person, but if you can and you find that person who gets you and you feel safe and comfortable working with them, it can make a profound difference. When it comes to writing a report for the DSP, such a person is going to be able to understand your situation and write well in support of you.

I understand you worrying about your parents supporting you. No doubt you will feel better if you have that external support which would take pressure off them. However, they will be supporting you because they love and care for you and want to see the best for you. So I think it's a case of being patient, as painful as the whole application process is, and just persevering and going through all the steps. If you have support via NDIS too that will likely help you to feel better and less like you a struggling in the wilderness without help, which I know can feel so challenging.

I hadn't realised I had replied to you before. All the best and feel free to let us know how it all goes. Take care!