Hi everyone, I’m reaching out because I feel incredibly isolated and
just can’t seem to deal with things alone anymore. I don’t talk to my
parents about my feelings because whenever I try, it ends in a fight,
and I just feel even worse. They often sa...
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Hi everyone, I’m reaching out because I feel incredibly isolated and
just can’t seem to deal with things alone anymore. I don’t talk to my
parents about my feelings because whenever I try, it ends in a fight,
and I just feel even worse. They often say I have an “easy life”—that
I’m lucky to have grown up in a nice house, in a family with money, and
in a good school. And while I can acknowledge that on the surface, they
don’t know half of what I’m going through. I wish they understood, but I
don’t think they ever will. They know I have ocd, but instead of being
supportive, they seem to think it makes me a “freak.” My ocd has
completely taken over my life—I’m constantly worrying about germs, can’t
sleep, and can’t drive because I’m terrified of causing harm. I’m
depressed every day, and these feelings have damaged my relationships. I
hate myself for it and feel so alone. I've even self-harmed, but they
have no idea, and I feel like I can’t talk about it with them without
being shut down. What they also don’t know is that a couple of years
ago, I was raped by someone I trusted. I’ve buried it for so long, but
I’m finally beginning to talk about it in therapy. It’s been extremely
difficult, and between sessions, I feel overwhelmed by intense emotions,
thoughts, and physical sensations that seem to bubble up, especially at
night. I’m mentally and physically exhausted, and sleep is a struggle. I
wish my parents could understand how much I hate feeling this way and
that I’d give anything not to feel this way. Recently, I tried opening
up to my mum about comments I get from people about my eating habits at
work—they make me feel self-conscious and judged. But when I tried
talking to her about it, she just brushed it off as “small talk” and
said that I “have a great life” and should be grateful. It felt like
another reminder that I’m not allowed to feel upset or express how hard
things are for me. After that, I just stormed off, and now I feel both
angry and defeated. I’ve been wanting to move out for years, but I’m
still a uni student, so it’s not financially possible yet. I just wish I
could find a way to stop feeling so alone and ashamed, and I’m hoping
maybe someone here might understand or have advice on how to cope with
these feelings. Thanks
How do I talk to my doctor?
