I'm lost

[Peania]

Hi, I would like to ask for some advice. I've been dealing with chronic insomnia and depression for over a decade now and I'm not even 20 yet. A reoccurring problem that I've lately had more trouble with than ever is that I feel like everything is so overwhelming that I can't seem to understand reality. I'm so confused about everything and I can't seem to understand the realness of life. How is time real? I can't seem to understand or piece together that anything is real. I feel so alone and sad. Please help me, please give some advice as I feel stuck in a fake reality when I know I've felt better before so this feeling can't be right.
Thank you and warm regards

[romantic_thi3f]

Hi Peania,

Welcome to the forums and thank you for being here and posting.

It sounds like from your post that you're dissociating a little bit. When we dissociate, sometimes can feel like we're in a dream, or we're on the outside looking in, or things don't feel real. Even though it feels very lonely, it's our body and minds way of coping when things get too much. You're not alone in feeling this way, and even though it's weird - it's more common than you may think.

Can I ask if you've gotten some support before, or if that's something you'd be open to? Maybe that's talking about things with someone you trust, like friends, family or a therapist.

Feel free to post again if you like. You're very welcome here.

[geoff]

Hello Peania, I'm pleased you have come to the site and I know that's never a pleasant feeling being like this at such an early age.

I can't diagnose you as I'm not qualified, so I have to be careful.

One of the earliest signs for many people is either insomnia or just wanting to stay in bed and these can be very similar, while some sleep too much, while others find it difficult to sleep, but none of this help how you are feeling.

A couple of things which may help you, go and see your doctor so they can diagnose you and then refer you onto a psychologist on a mental health plan, this will entitle you to 10 paid sessions by Medicare per year.

The other suggestion is if you can cliclk onto 'The Facts' at the top of this page, scroll down until you see K-10, do this test a few times, not straight after the other, but different days as well as times, then you can take this with you when you see your doctor.

Hope this helps you, but please get back to us.

Geoff.

[NotYetEffulgent]

Hi Peania,

As a fellow sufferer of insomnia I can relate to the feelings you’ve described. Time just doesn’t flow right, hours go missing, yesterday feels like today. Did someone mention something? What was I literally just doing? Some days can be so confusing, it’s not quiet as fake as a dream, but it’s certainly not reality. I’ve notice the amount of information I can retain suffers, the days languish, but the year can disappear in a blink. You think you’re hallucinating, but then you can’t even really trust that observation.

Some advice you’re likely to find:

See your GP, rule anything out. Like is it depression causing it or the other way around? They can also prescribe a whole bunch of different things to try and facilitate sleep.

Routine with sleep is crucial, in particular getting up at the same time everyday. Make sure you allow enough time to sleep, that includes extra time for any sleep interruptions you might have. I believe 7-8 hours every-night is the standard requirement.

Use warm color house lights and dim them. Blue wave light tells your body it’s time to get up. You can get special glasses that block the blue light, if you’re poor like me you can use a cheap pair of red laser glasses off ebay. Avoid screens for 1-2 hours before bed. Consider a plasma TV over a LED display, plasma has a redder base wave length compared with the bluer LED’s.

Cut out sugary foods or drinks late at night. Avoid caffeine. Alcohol may be one to avoid for some people as well, and can interfere with meds. Exercise, but not before bed. A quick morning walk in the sun for 10min can get your vitamin D, and helps tell your brain it is day time, gets your metabolism going as well. An evening HIT session can get you exhausted and ready for the quieter night ahead.

For stress, try writing down a list of what’s got to be done for tomorrow, keep it beside your bed and if something pops into your head write it down. Organise and simplify your life. Consider a journal, getting the thoughts out can really put your mind at ease. Make sure your sleep environment is quiet, comfortable and distraction free. If living with others ask if they can do all their noisy activities before x time. Consider some form of white noise to block-out any unwanted disturbances. Consider meditation or reading a book to put your mind in a better frame/state before sleeping. Thinking about being sleepy and the feelings associated with falling asleep can put some people to sleep.

N.Y.E

[StevenK]

Hey there, Peania.

thank you for sharing your story... and i really do feel the words you have written, as there very close to my heart.. and i lived them through many many years... i suffered through anxiety depression and insomnia for over 10 years... and spent most of them in my room, i wanted to say first of..

by you asking those question's i can tell your searching for answers and this is such a massive step, in learning how to deal with mental issues, or work on ourselves, everyone can get through it.. and i know that's so general advice.. but i believe if you really want to you can... i studied hours and hours and hours over a decade learning about the meaning of life.. i eventually got the door open and now am on recovery.. and i take great joy in maybe saying something that mite just helps someone else..

i believe the answers always come in ideas or thoughts or suggestion's or small signs.. and in the choices in our lives... but basically we all grew up a certain way, everything we herd and seen and felt and watched from our parents.. determined how we were going to see and live in the world... thus we call self esteem... everything we value and hold to us... is how we perceive the world.

problem is the mind, likes to create doubt and destruct because it operates what it was programmed to do. you are a product of your enviroment.. now that certainly does not mean you can't change your destiny.. but it will take a lot of determination to change and re program the way we think...

because we are our thoughts... our thoughts create our feelings, and feelings, create habbit's that creates our lives..

i highly recommend professional help surely.. but also to take up reading.. i strongly recommend you too take up self development books.. and throw your self into it.. we all have a purpose, and calling, we all have talent and abilities underneath the junk and baggage,

some books that changed my life.. were

power of now (highly recommend)

magic of thinking big,

awaken the giant within

think and grow rich,

And books on self esteem,

confusion comes from racing thoughts, somethings causing it deep down, there's something going on, i suggest write your heart out, on a pc or laptop, or paper, write everything that you feel, good or bad, everything.. let it out, when you said how is anything real.. i suffered this for so many years.. i lived in my mind, as was absent from my body, carrying it around without emotion or life.. and i said the same.