Here we stand.

[Guest_4987]

Hi, I wish I was not writing my thoughts on this forum but I am. To me this means I am in a dark space so I am therefore really glad to be letting some of my stuff out on this forum. Suffering from depression from a young age (some years worse than others) I never give up trying to help myself, it has been  couple of years now since I have slipped into the dark hole I find myself today but hey tomorrow is another day. How ever bad i think i feel you only need to look around the world and just think of how desperate and unsafe much of the world population is. When I was young to middle age I tried to block out my life I have since found that does not work, what to me does work is to be kind to myself, use meds if appropriate for you, counselling if available and try to stay out of my own head as much as possible, I can and do make situations so much worse if I delve to deeply into things which I should just let be. I contacted my Psychologist by email yesterday he phoned me within an hour and what a pleasure it was to talk to him, he had many positive thing to say which cheered me heaps, I must admit i have seen many Psychologists over the years and know you need to find the right one for you. I live in a isolated rural environment and am relying of forums like this for contact as not to feel so isolated and unconnected.

Thats all for now.

Shaun the Sheep

[Neil_1]

Hi there STS

Welcome to Beyond Blue and thank you for coming here and providing your post.  Quite a deep and in depth one at that.

I was thinking, “wow, that’s amazing that you were able to contact your psych on a Sunday” but then you went on to say that you live quite isolated, so me being me, I put two and two together and came up with, “ahh, that must be why”.  Was I right with my addition?

That’s also the great thing about having a site like this – it’s open and useable by pretty much anyone and it’s as anonymous as you want to make it.  I mean, take your name for instance;  is your first name really Shaun and indeed, are you really a sheep?  These are things that mask your anonymity just beautifully and very cleverly I might add.

But having this site, doesn’t detract from whether you’re a city dweller, town dweller, country dweller or where-ever – it knows no boundaries and is accepting of all players.

I like the fact that you can come here and unload as much or as little as you want.

That does sound like you have a good repour with your psych, which is so important.  Do you also have a local GP that you’re able to get too?  I guess I ask this out of possibility of being on any medication?

Oh boy, I hear you big time when you say about the thing with how situations can be beat up to become mountains when really they are just potentially tiny little hills.  But that’s another thing we do with this illness – I guess it’s party of our make-up, that we do aim for the negative and make things possibly worse than they are.  That’s where we need helpful people close by us to reinforce the positives and we need to tell the negatives that if you’re going to dominate my head, I’ll simply answer like Daryl Kerrigan from The Castle, “Tell ‘em they’re dreaming”.

Neil

[Guest_4987]

Hi Neil, Thanks for the reply.

No STS is not my real name i took STS  on from the tv show of the same name,it is just my cup of tea (kids show but hey whatever blows your wig back right). I grew up in Balmain Sydney in the 70 s was a rough and tough place in them days lots of street stuff happening of which I was part of, if i knew then what I know now I would certainly have taken another path but alas that wasn't the way for me then so it is what it is and one needs to make the best  of what is on offer now as the past is the past we can't change that, so i try to be brave and move on. I did a quick search on the net found a site with his name (psych) attached sent him a message and blow me down he called within 1 hour, I have not seen this man for 5 years and he remembers my stuff and full of positive stuff to say  how kool is that.I have just moved to my current location 1 year ago with no local GP as yet so first thing this morning I made an appointment as I believe i have responded well to the right med's for me, so another thing will be sorted in a few days.

I spent 40 years in 1 industry and could see that no other industry for me BUT i had a choice then if i elected to change the type of work i did unfortunately i didn't BUT now i have changed and like the work i do so much so what i'm saying is get out of what is not making you happy and do something that does it takes courage and effort but all worth while.

Your 100% correct in saying that it is good to be able to unload what is in your head to any one interested to read it .

STS 

[Neil_1]

Hi there STS

Great to have received your latest response for that rundown of things.  I like the way you described it, “it is what it is” and that is absolute fact.  What’s done is done and can’t be changed – so we just move on as best we can from that.

That was amazing about the psych that you tracked down – no wonder you were blown away by that and sounds like a great operator with his responses to you as well.

Wow, that must be remote to have no local GP – or maybe I’ve just got my head in the sand and really don’t know the lay of the land with how big a place has to be to have a GP.  No bother, just me typing out loud – I sometimes do that;  and sometimes, I’ll even answer my own question;  not necessarily the right one, mind, but at least it’s an answer.  Whoops, slight digression there.

Yes, the work situation can be a tricky one.  It’d be an interesting survey to take I reckon – survey thousands upon thousands of people and ask them are they happy in their current work?  Or questions along those lines.  I think a lot of answers perhaps would be “No, but I’ve got a job and that’s security in itself”.  Anyway, that could develop into a mega thread all on its own I feel.

Great to hear from you again.

Neil

[Guest_4987]

Hey Neil,

Today is a shocker for me not travelling well at all.

Days like this i would rather forget but I choose not to as I know things will be better tomorrow, I now have a reasonably local doc so will be seeing him on Thursday as I can do with some meds to take the edge off and I might get a little sleep.

I also answer many questions i ask myself but also answer many that i don't even ask.

To try to get on top of my depression I have booked into a CBT course on  line, gov funded which is good and will give my mind something positive to think about.

Must go

STS and the mob

[Neil_1]

Hi there STS

These days of bad and horror ones come and it’s never any easier when they arrive – it’s just something that we can never get used to.  They come and they hit us hard and more often than not, it won’t be just the one day, so I really hope that when you’re reading this, that you are feeling a bit better.

I hope your upcoming doc’s appointment is a helpful one for you and also great to hear about the CBT course that you’ve booked in to do.  As you say, more positive things to put in place to help cope and hopefully give new aspects on how we can move forward.

It’s funny – today being Wednesday and I’ve heard it twice already today, “Welcome to Hump Day” – and oh boy, when I first heard that way back a long long time ago, I giggled and thought that extremely naughty (I was just a fresh faced country boy in my first job).  But maturity (um, yeah, it’s still happening I think) and years have revealed that Hump Day is in fact, the middle of the working week.

I don’t find the term annoying or anything like that, more so, a little amusing.  I guess it’s for people who perhaps don’t have any mental illness and so they feel down and such leading up to Wednesday and that they then get on a rollercoaster as they zoom down hill on Thursday and pick up even more speed on the Friday as they hurtle towards their weekend.

Whoops, again, perhaps a topic for a whole different thread.

Cheers

Neil

[Yanni]

Hi Shaun - Just read your post about regretting decisions and choices made in the past. I am at that point at the moment and it is hitting me hard. I am having a lot of trouble seeing the past as the past and was wondering how you came to terms with this.  These choices are effecting me now and Im not sure how to deal with them.  Any suggestions?

[Guest_4987]

Hi Yanni,

Welcome to BB. I hope your feeling a  bit better now and hope you had a nice Christmas. 

For a long time I could not get things out of my mind, in essence that doesn't need to be a bad thing but if it gives you pain then it becomes problematic, for me that was the way it was so I learnt with practice to just accept things. These days I try not to over think things if I do I can make a mountain out of a mound, another thing I accept is that the past is the past we all can't change that so for me I just need to accept it or let it run my life..i elect to let it be so i don't get depressed or go crazy.

Yanni just be kind to yourself, don't over thing things..spend time doing the things you like to do..watch a good movie..go to the beach or whatever!! 

Any recovery does take some effort..you just need to find what works for you..you can do it Yanni.

Talk Soon, take care.

STS..Wayne

[Yanni]

Hey Wayne. STS

Thanks for the reply. Yes Christmas was quite good. Hope yours was too. Your words of wisdom helped. You are right, I am very hard on myself. I think as my realizations have been quite a recent thing that I also need a bit more time to go by so they are not so raw. It is reassuring to know that other people have felt the same way and survived. Anyway, thanks again and I hope the coming year is good to you.

Yanni

[KTOCD]

Hey Wayne,

hope u start to feel a little better soon. Let us know how you are travelling. Thinking of u!!!

KT