Windywillow,
Thank you so much for posting here, welcome to the forums. I'm sorry to hear that you've been feeling like this and for so long. You must be exhausted. Depression and social anxiety can really take a toll on your body as well as your mind. It also sounds like the assessment result was a cherry on top of a stressful time.
Have you had the opportunity to chat with anyone about how you're feeling? A friend, family member, loved one, or a professional like a GP or psychologist? It can often help to hear others' insights, particularly if they know you quite well. Otherwise, have you ever considered keeping a journal or writing out how you're feeling? That can also help to make sense of what's going on in your mind, and it can feel quite therapeutic to write it all out somewhere if you haven't had the chance to express it much before.
Something simple you can do to help restore some of that inspiration can be to connect with nature in some way, whether it's exercise (which can also help for motivation), or just to relish in your existence for a little while and pay attention to small things like birds chirping or wind whistling through trees.
In terms of isolation and loneliness, what makes you feel the most connected to other people? Is it being in the company of others, chatting in person, communicating over the phone? Do you feel connected when you're doing an activity with someone, or maybe if you're in a club or a group with people who have common interests? This may help you to decide where to direct your efforts socially in order to feel the most fulfilled, provided you have the space to dedicate to fostering relationships with others at the moment. If you don't, that's okay, there are other small things you can do to feel connected to people too.
I hope this helps in some way, please feel free to keep chatting with us if you'd like. We're here to support you.
Take care, SB
