Hi dboy,
Welcome to Beyondblue. I'm pleased that you've chosen to share how you feel. I hope here you will feel supported and perhaps even receive some useful advice.
It's a tough situation you find yourself in. I'm sorry that you didn't receive from the mental health system what you deserve - help.
Have you sought additional professional help since being discharged from the Psychiatric ward? I think the best place to start would be to see a GP and get some recommendations for appropriate treatment, and this doesn't have to be ending up in hospital again. There are a list of GPs who specialise in mental health on Beyondblue's website.
Were you diagnosed with an illness while you were in hospital? I'm assuming there must have been a reason for the self sabotage and destruction of your relationships? Has this type of behavior happened before?
Losing these important relationships must have caused immense pain, and I'm guessing you blame yourself. But if you weren't mentally or emotionally well it wasn't your fault. Having said that a loss is a loss and I wonder if you've thought about grief counseling?
The BB website has a lot of resources available and the phone line is useful in times of crisis. Its really important that if you feel like ending your life is the only option there is immediate help available. We all want you to be safe, and to be here tomorrow.
You commented that now you are just getting by. What does this involve? Are you working? Do you get any visiting time with your son?
I hope my questions aren't too overwhelming, I look forward to hearing back from you.
AGrace
