Changing medication feeling alive again.

[4x4]

So 2 years ago i went on medication for depreasion and anxiety.

Suffered from ilnesses for about 10 years and finally tried medication then.

Its helped a heap, anxiety is almost gone but still got depression.

So as it helps stop the lows it limits the highs. 6 moths ago i went off my medication to see how id cope with out it, under discusion with doc.

I had never felt so alive world went from black and white to full of colour but then i had 2 major episodes. Wasn't great.

Me and doc talked and ive been back on medication

Lifes just not interesting. I feel no emotion towards anything. He has surgested maybe swapping medication see how i go with that one.

Anyone found a solution for there experinces like that on medication?

[uncut_gems]

Hi 4x4,

Great question about a topic that we probably don't talk about enough in mental health circles. I should preface this by noting that I'm not a medical professional, and that as a rule we don't discuss specific medications here on the forums.

That said, I have a lot of experience with antidepressants and I think you absolutely hit the nail on the head. I describe it very similarly to you– that while the meds cut out the low lows, they also cut out the high highs– like compressing the volume on a sound file.

As you so accurately note, this is a double-edged sword: speaking from my own experience, I find that it allows me to get on with my life, but it sometimes feels like it dulls everything else. Conversely, by stopping the meds, you may feel that you are experiencing life in "full colour" again, but of course you are liable to fall back into another episode.

I think that the key is to weigh the positives and negatives, both internally with yourself and aloud with your doc. Personally, I have found that the positives far outweigh these negatives, and every day for the past 10 years when I take the medicine I reaffirm to myself that that's the case.

I have personally found that some of the emotional blunting has gone away over the years, for reasons I don't really understand. But I now find myself able to cry much more easily, and feel things more deeply. I can't really explain why this is, as I haven't adjusted my dose or medication in years, but suffice it to say even beyond swapping prescriptions and doses until you find the right one, this feeling may not last forever.

You are absolutely doing the right thing in talking with your doc, checking in on the forums for advice, and being thoughtful about medication side-effects. I feel confident that you and your doctor will be able to find the right combination for you.

Warmly,

Gems

[bluenight]

Hi uncut_gems

Yeh I have been feeling depressed for about 2 months and it was getting bad so I decided to try an antidepressant. I've been on them before but came off earlier this year. When I was depressed I was emotionally numb a lot and now with the antidepressant I'm feeling more like myself. I'm surprised that I'm saying this because only about 3 months ago I never wanted to go on medication again.

I think it helps that this one seems to be working so far.

[White_Rose]

Hello Everyone

Medication can be a boon and/or a bad experience. I have tried so many SSRI meds that sometimes I feel I have tried the lot. However I know there are many more out there. Like many people I vowed I would never take ADs but was persuaded to try. I think for me it was a time of great depression which I finally got through without much assistance from SSRI meds. They did nothing or had horrendous side effects. At one stage I was taking the same AD as a colleague. She found it great while I had quite brutal side effects. It just depends on your body chemistry I think.

My GP suggested I change to a TCA medication and I have not looked bad. These were the original ADs and got a bit of bad press because they were prescribed so freely and in large doses. I take my meds at night because they make me a bit sleepy. That's it. I found I had a sense of calmness in my life which had been missing before. And of course it helped me greatly to cope and manage my depression.

I'm not sure if ADs lose their effectiveness over time or not. This is best discussed with a psychiatrist or your GP. Again I think it's our individual body chemistry that affects the usefulness of any medication. A bit like taking an antibiotic. Some people are OK with them while others have side effects and sometimes these interfere with the efficiency of the drug. Horses for courses.

So I suggest you keep talking to your prescribing doctor, keep a record of side effects and how much the drug helps. That way you get a picture of what helps and what does not.

Mary

[Lena_J]

From what I've seen it's pretty rare for someone to find a medication that covers it all. Allows you to keep a little of the highs, but take away the lows.
Imagine if there was one drug that did that. Allowed the happiness, took away the depression, allowed the manic days but at the same time controlled the way you used the credit card lol.
I just don't think a fix all drug is there and we just have to find other ways to manage.
It really sucks. Not only do you have all these issues to deal with but then you have the social stigma that goes along with it.
I think if you find something that works a little bit you're onto a good thing.