Hi, welcome
This period of your life is testing and you no doubt cant see anything but the struggling present. Eventually it does get better and you need to believe in that because like so many others that have lived through it- like myself, we know it improves.
Once separation begins its really his life/your life situation. The times when you helped him with his business is no longer valid, its just memories. Your childrens financial needs are his only obligations that is generally handed down in a family court decision.
When it comes to child support, his obligations are worked out on a formula basis, based on his personal taxable income. That means income that his business (if its a company) has allocated to him personally. This means he has control over his own income to himself and thats how some people minimalise their own income and therefore their child support amount. If he was an employee at a job he'd not be able to avoid such income to the taxation department and his child support could be much higher.
If you place a claim for child support (or a review) then the process is that he will get a copy of your claim and be able to comment. Then you'll get a copy of his comments and be able to answer that. Then it will go to an independent legal solicitor commissioned by child support for an interview to make a judgement. One of the problems you face is judging his situation eg he might well fly overseas but that could be declared his business interests. If his company spends a lot in this way then less taxed income and less personal income. Again it can be controlled.
I'm only speculating but it is worth putting in a review.
The other thing to mention is- its not what you earn but what you spend that can make life better. Do a budget. Look at mobile phone plans and contact your telco to see if there is a cheaper plan. Food, cheaper meals. Clothing and so on. Contact your local council and request a food assistance and you could qualify for a box of food at this tough time of year. If you feel very depressed there's a number at the bottom of this page to ring or lifeline.
I'm sorry I cant help more. You seem to be a great mum and now that your kids are teenagers they should understand and band together to make things more manageable. As for food costs consider taking up the challenge of making cheap meals. I made special fried rice one night last week, a whole batch and some satay chicken at low cost. You might already do this but its worth toughing it out and bouncing back to being positive for 2026.
Reply anytime I'm here daily. I hope you are ok
TonyWK
