Can't get rid of anger

JacintaMarie

Hi again

I've been okay, but I can't stop my anger about my management. I go okay than I get angry than depressed.

I don't have evidence against them, just a gut feeling. I think I'm the only one, as everyone else thinks their great.

My brain is getting filled up with crap & its sore in my head. I don't know why I can't let it go, & just them get on with it, as they'll be found out sooner or later, but I just can't. And do my work & just get paid. I think it might be because I don't think their very good & gotta find evidence, so government can rid of them.

I want my brain to be peaceful, but don't know how.

And it is terrible to think your management are not very good & they'll be there until they retire, so between 9 and 28 years.

Just want peace in brain & to be able to let them go. All my ideas are stupid, the people aren't doers & you need to climb up to make changes.

Also depressing, is that even if I leave, the new place will be the same, so gotta "fix" myself before I leave.

It was my fault, as I write this, I made my head sore.

Jessica_Cloud

I hear your struggle. Our brains can be so cruel to us. One thing that you might try is to look for the evidence that what your brain is saying is true. If you can’t find actual evidence, then maybe you can tell your brain to shut up and stop being mean. Feelings are not evidence. Feelings are not facts. A mere belief is not the same as knowing a fact. Challenge your thinking and be wiser and smarter than your unhelpful automatic thoughts. You can do this.

Daydreamer70

I understand completley the struggle of having a lot of brain clutter. It feels super chaotic when your thoughts feel too loud and overwhelming. A tool i like to use when I feel like i need to get things off my mind is journalling. I know it can seem small and insignificant, but even just seeing my thoughts on a physical page makes it easier to let certain things go and move forward. Our brains can be confusing and messy sometimes, but i try to think of what I can control, which is how I choose to respond to the thoughts i have. Try also reaching out to someone you trust to speak about how you are feeling, this often helps me too. The Beyond Blue services are always incredible and ready to help.

sbella02

JacintaMarie,

Thank you for posting here, and I'm sorry to hear that this has become quite distressing for you. It can be frustrating to lack control or the ability to make changes in an environment where you spend a lot of your time.

Firstly, ideas are not stupid. Often, "stupid" ideas are great suggestions with no place to go. They could work really well in another setting.

I'd like to echo Jessica_Cloud's words here, in that:

Feelings are not evidence. Feelings are not facts. A mere belief is not the same as knowing a fact. Challenge your thinking and be wiser and smarter than your unhelpful automatic thoughts.

It's important to remember that our thoughts are just that: thoughts. We can really wrap ourselves up in a bit of a thought prison that's difficult to escape from. Sometimes it can be helpful to just let them exist and tell yourself that they don't always reflect reality. Our brains are really good at dwelling on things and giving them greater meaning than they are worth.

Having said that, I know from experience that management problems can be difficult to navigate and that it's so easy to get wrapped up in the negatives at work. Especially if you spend a lot of your time there, you start to recognise where and when you're being treated unfairly, or where there might be injustices or mismanagement, and it can be challenging to move past that and get on with your work with this in mind.

So, from my own experiences, you may have several options:

"Toughing it out" - seeking refuge in the good moments and trying to push through the bad; engaging in things you love to do outside of work; reminding yourself of why you started, where you're going, and holding onto that sense of purpose
Approaching people who are higher up to try and affect some kind of change (e.g. HR, union, etc.)
Moving to a different department
Switching workplaces entirely

Which of these, if at all, do you think you'd fall more into? Which of these have you already tried or would be willing to try?

I hope this resonates with you. Feel free to keep chatting with us if you'd like, we're here to give support.

All the best, SB

JacintaMarie

Thanks Jessica

JacintaMarie

Hi

I might do that, when I get home. I want peace in head.

JacintaMarie

Hi

Thanks for that, some good points in there. I think with my management, I need to go, as there not going to get better & I don't have evidence to send to higher ups, besides it might just be my brain. At times I feel bad that they need to go, but than I think, they're not doing job.

I'll try with the feelings aren't fact or evidence.

The only thing I've been doing is wishing to universe, for them to be taken away, & some better people in the job