Worst Joke Wednesday

[Neil_1]

Hi all

I know a while back there was a thread with some jokes on it - just to try and lighten the load for folk and to provide a few jolly japes and spiffy spifferoons (those words etched in my memory bank from the late and great Kenny Everitt).  However, I was far to lazy to try and find the other thread, so thought I'd start up a new one WJW.

Here we go people, something to start you off with:

"When I was a small boy, I had a dog named Tax.  I'd open the door and "Income Tax""

"That very same year, I had a bird called Enza.  I'd open the window and "Influenza"

Now, they can't be done on any other day - for it is after all, Worst Joke Wednesday.

See if you can beat either of those?

[Guest_4643]

Why do Seagulls fly over the Sea?

Because if they flew over the Bay, they'd be called Bagels.

(Oh god).

[ecomama]

LOLOLOLOL @ Tay!

A nice clean joke I can share with the grandkids!

Thanks for that one Tay
EMxxxx

[Guest_4643]

Lol EM, I found it on Google. It took me a while to get it though lol

[NobleAlarc32]

@Croix ... I mean... "kwuh"... "kw-kwuh"... I really hope I'm pronouncing that correctly. (I'm a master amateur linguist, but I'm terrible with names, heheh... 😅 )

Anyway, I was going to post a joke about politics, but it's a little redundant to post jokes about... well, y'know. Jokes. Kind of like when people make jokes about puns... no doubt someone's gonna be offended. 100% guaranteed. 🙃

[Guest_4643]

"Let's run away and get married.

I'm sorry.. But I Cantaloupe."

lol

[Croix]

What do you call a sad cantaloupe?
Meloncholy

[ecomama]

BUT ....

Why did the koala cross the road?
Because it was on the back of the chicken.

More importantly, only just lol, is HOW you pronounce Croix?
My BF told me it's like CROY. Is this how you pronounce Croix, Croix?

I thought it was like QUWAH or Crrwah, he says NO, it's Croy.

This is the first time a man has come between us! LOL.

EM

[ecomama]

A piece of string went in to a bar one day and asked for a beer.

The bar man pointed to a sign behind him that clearly said, "String not served on these premises", then told the piece of string to leave the bar immediately.

The piece of string went into the street and threw himself against the walls, along the foot paths, against bins and all over the place until he was a tangled mess.

Then he went back into the bar and asked for a beer.

Again, the bar man pointed to the sign and said, "I just told you we don't serve string here!
You are a piece of string aren't you?"

To which the piece of string replied "A frayed knot".

[Guest_4643]

Why did the Orange stop in the middle of the road?

Because he ran out of juice

[NobleAlarc32]

I: Knock-knock.

U: Who's there?

I: Avocado.

U: Avocado who?

I: Knock-knock.

U: Who's there?

I: Avocado.

U: Avocado who?

I: Knock-knock.

U: ...

I: Knock... Knock.

U: Sigh... Who's there...?

I: Orange.

U: Orange...? Orange who?

I: Orange you glad I didn't say, "Avocado"?