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when did you first become aware of your anxiety?
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hi all,
i recently started a new job after a horrible experience at a previous workplace. im 15, nearly 16, and was so excited to finally make some money after a few months off due to COVID-19. the people there are so lovely and all very chill, but i noticed that after my first shift i was getting extreme stomach aches days before my next shift. at the time i didn’t know why, but all i knew is that it was followed by shakiness and feeling light headed.
i am usually known for having a bright bubbly personality, always seeing things on the bright side, but since i had started the job i felt a lot less bright and was really struggling to gain any motivation and would instead dwell on these stomach aches, until i finally told my mum.
for a bit of backstory, my family has a history of depression and anxiety so my parents are very proactive when it comes to their kids mental health and well-being.
my stomach aches, shakiness and light headedness quickly turned into panics before work which would leave me in tears. i dreaded going into work even though it was twice a week for 8 hours all up.
i tried to push through and make it through shifts and build up confidence to go into work, but it ended up being way to panic inducing, so i ultimately came to the conclusion that i should resign until i have my panic attacks and anxiety surrounding working under control.
the anxiety started off being based on how poorly i was treated at my pervious job, but over a few weeks i started feeling more and more anxious about more and more things. this was when my parents really started to notice my change in personality, how i stopped doing simple tasks like cleaning my room.
i am consistently tired and have a feeling of dullness all the time. i haven’t sincerely felt happy in 2 months. i feel as though there is nothing ahead of me, just the same numbness forever until i die, which makes me feel very content with death, not bothered at all if i do die.
i am booked for a psych appointment in feb, but time feels like it’s dragging slowly and i haven’t had a decent sleep in weeks. asleep by 3 am, awake by 7, drowsy until 12, calm/dull until night. it’s an endless cycle that i can’t seem to kick.
i never knew this would be so hard to cope with, is this what’s to be expected or am i just sensitive?
geez posting this lifts a whole weight off my shoulders, even if no one sees it.
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Hello Greendino, I've just replied to your other post and hope that what I've said does help you.
It's been such a complicated and confusing past 2 years, especially for someone your age but understand how you feel.
To answer your original question, my anxiety started when I was about 5 years old as I taught myself to have OCD, an explanation if you want to know, but concerning you and as your family has been depressed with anxiety then your chances of developing this may be high, although I'm not a doctor to qualify.
You seem to be caught up in a cycle and your other post may help you overcome this, can I also suggest Kids Helpline (5 to 25 years of age) 1800 55 1800 by phone web chat or online, these are trained counsellors but adapt to the age of you and may help you further.
This is just an introductory reply and hope to continue if you are able to reply back to us.
Best wishes.
Geoff.
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Hello Greendino
Im so sorry you are experiencing this
i have experienced alot of work anxiety in the past....a similar experience from a bad job i used to have and at the moment im currently in an amazing job that gives me no anxiety at all and im so glad to be at this stage
My anxiety probably started at my first job when i was 14 as i was treated badly, the good news is not all workplaces are bad
but taking a break to work on your anxiety is not a bad idea
im so glad you have booked an appt with a psych as it can really help to talk this through with someone, it helped me alot
is this whats to be expected? i dont think all workplaces should be this damaging as its just not right...you will eventually find a job that treats you well and no your not too sensitive we can all be affected by something similar
Im so glad that a weight has been lifted off your shoulder
Please reach out whenever you need to
I hope this helps
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I first discovered that I had anxiety when i was about 25, im 28 now. I have GAD, Generalised anxiety. When I was diagnosed it was such a relief that I wasn't crazy for feeling the way I have my whole life.
Looking back I first experienced anxiety when I was about 5 years old. I wish I could go back and tell younger me that it is okay and that your feelings are normal. Wishing I was about to self diagnose sooner.