Anxiety

Loneliness and my thought patterns

replies: 13

Hi guys, i am trying to be kind to myself and acknowledge that this is a problem I should talk about, even though I know this may not be as serious as others are experiencing. I am a 32 year old Sydney resident for at least 5 or so years now. I have ... View more

Hi guys, i am trying to be kind to myself and acknowledge that this is a problem I should talk about, even though I know this may not be as serious as others are experiencing. I am a 32 year old Sydney resident for at least 5 or so years now. I have frequently experienced loneliness throughout my life, as well as GAD and some minor depression, and have had few relationships and/or encounters. The last serious relationship I was in was 2 years ago and I have not dated or indeed been intimate with anyone since that time until very recently. For all intents and purposes I have a good life. I live in a nice suburb, in a nice apartment, have kept my job as a legal adviser during COVID and otherwise am comfortable. Logically I have a good thing going, yet I constantly battle with loneliness and isolation. I have very few friends in the city, and tend to get very nervous and/or fatigued trying to find/engage in new activities. Recently, I became friends with an amazing girl who has some of her own mental health problems. We became close friends and have been intimate at least twice. However she has since expressed that whilst she loves me as a friend, she is not interested in pursuing a relationship. I knew this when we were intimate and had resigned myself to this, but through helping her through an episode recently and through not having much in the way of other close relationships, I have fallen for this girl. I have expressed this to her, and she has let me down gently. I obviously don’t blame her, and do not expect that she will reciprocate my feelings simply because I have them, but nevertheless it has triggered me to have a strong bout of loneliness, which is bordering on depression. Most importantly, my inner critical voice has stirred up as a result, and I am becoming very unkind to myself about my perceived failings in my romantic life. Recently I have been taking steps to try and recognise these negative thought patterns, but every time I think about this girl, and the fact she has started dating others, I feel an immense sadness, which sometimes triggers off these thoughts. I guess my question is: should I do something within these sad moments, or should I continue to allow myself to feel these sad moments to help process the pain. I’m concerned that whilst I should allow myself to feel sad without judgement, if I don’t actively take steps to combat these moments, that it may turn into a cycle of self pity. Thanks

My social anxiety is causing problems with my friendships

replies: 2

I feel trapped emotionally by my social anxiety & not sure what to do. My GP has started me on a new SSRI but it's been 10 days & I feel worse. My last encounter with friends over lunch was awkward & I had to leave early with a lame excuse. I just co... View more

I feel trapped emotionally by my social anxiety & not sure what to do. My GP has started me on a new SSRI but it's been 10 days & I feel worse. My last encounter with friends over lunch was awkward & I had to leave early with a lame excuse. I just couldn't endure staying any longer & despite a quick toilet trip which I didn't need, I landed up leaving the restaurant. I lasted 3 hours but 1.5 hours is enough for me. I feel embarrassed, stressed, very anxious & can't face going out with them again. Next luncheon is on 3rd March but I don't want to yo. Should I tell them what is happening & be honest or try & ride it through? My relationship with one of my friends who I considered my best friend has changed recent weeks & trust is a big issue now.

'Hit and Run OCD" Fears

replies: 3

Hey everybody so recently over the past month or so I have been experiencing an uncommon subtype of Obsessives Compulsive Disorder that relates to driving although I have had a history of OCD and Anxiety with driving a car for a while now and this is... View more

Hey everybody so recently over the past month or so I have been experiencing an uncommon subtype of Obsessives Compulsive Disorder that relates to driving although I have had a history of OCD and Anxiety with driving a car for a while now and this is just the latest manifestation. So basically Hit and Run OCD falls under Harm OCD in which an individual has a fear of causing harm to themselves or others in this case this is an irrational fear of hitting someone most commonly a pedestrian or cyclist and I quote 'Not being aware of it" and driving off and leaving the scene of an accident or failing to provide assistance then be arrested charged and worst being sent to prison or at best having to live with a forever tarnished reputation criminal record and a life just not worth living life of shame and guilt. You hear of hit and runs in the news where a person drives of leaving someone helplessly injured or dying but these type of people are often speeding negligent on drugs or under the influence of alcohol I have never been guilty of any of those things, I like to think I am a safe driver maybe a little over cautious sometimes but my OCD intrusive thought and fear is " What if I hit someone and did not realize and drove off " "What if..." the 'infamous What if" It is crazy to think you could hit someone or something and be unaware I mean you would feel see and hear it as traumatic as it is. Often I pass a pedestrian or cyclist it triggers some of these intrusive thoughts. "What if I did not wait long enough for them to cross "(even though the road is clear) "What if I hit them and did not know and have left an "accident scene" in my head without realizing I often avoid driving unless I have to work and have become more housebound than usual afraid or apprehensive about going out ( we live on a small property ) My OCD has been impacted my study and as for work being in Hospitality that is somewhat limited at the moment although I do enjoy my job as a Kitchen Hand I find it provides a healthy outlet and distraction for OCD I enjoy working but I find that intrusive thoughts are taking over both at work and at home I do not get a rest from it. As for the compulsion element well this is a text book case here are the some of the compulsions I do "Retracing the route I have gone either by car or on foot to "look for bodies " or any sign of an "incident" "Listening for "ambulance sirens" "reading local news updates for "incidents " and some others.

Anxiety and OCD. It’s all new.

replies: 3

Hey guys. first time poster! Over the last 4 weeks I’ve been feeling increasingly worried and anxious. Something that I’ve never really felt before. The symptoms started during a random fight with my dad, which I believe to be the trigger. My Mum lef... View more

Hey guys. first time poster! Over the last 4 weeks I’ve been feeling increasingly worried and anxious. Something that I’ve never really felt before. The symptoms started during a random fight with my dad, which I believe to be the trigger. My Mum left our family 3 years ago to move to another state which is something that I’ve struggled with. I’ve been seeing a psychologist for 2 weeks now and we’re working towards an answer. Everyday that passes I don’t feel like myself. Constantly having spiralling thoughts like: ‘am I going crazy’ and ‘do I have schizophrenia’. These thoughts continue to spiral until I can manifest an answer or provide some rationale. I’m struggling with brain fog as well, not being able to concentrate or remember things that I normally would I can still go to work, study and interact with friends and I am lucky for that. I’m only 19 and work myself into a constant panic that my life is ruined. any advice or thoughts would be greatly appreciated. Thank you.

Health anxiety

replies: 6

I have been having such a bad time with physical symptoms today and it’s been just awful. I have got severe health anxiety but things haven’t been so bad lately until today . I haven’t had any anti depression medication for 3 days so I’m wandering if... View more

I have been having such a bad time with physical symptoms today and it’s been just awful. I have got severe health anxiety but things haven’t been so bad lately until today . I haven’t had any anti depression medication for 3 days so I’m wandering if that has anything to do with what I’m feeling. Got palpitations in heart , headache, ringing in my ears and my brain feels like it’s shaking. I have had these symptoms before and they usually go away after 1 hour or so but have been feeling like this most of the day . Find it so hard to relax. I have had lots of tests in the past but nothing is found and I’m told it’s anxiety although I always feel it’s so much more than that. I really think Iam going to ask for more tests to be done as I’m sick of feeling like this. I just want to feel ok and not always feeling like something is wrong with me as it’s an awful way to live.

Unsure about a lot in life.

replies: 3

So I've got a lot going on in my head and I feel like it's too much to post in one thread on here. So am wondering the process I take to find a great therapist? Do I start off with going to my GP, or can I find one myself? Do I need a referral? What ... View more

So I've got a lot going on in my head and I feel like it's too much to post in one thread on here. So am wondering the process I take to find a great therapist? Do I start off with going to my GP, or can I find one myself? Do I need a referral? What are the average prices? I have no idea how any off it works.

I feel like my obsession is ruining my life

replies: 2

Hello, this is my first post here. I know that I’m not officially diagnosed with any specific anxiety disorders, but dealing with a lot I've been under of stress lately from my obsessive thoughts. It started around seven years ago when I started worr... View more

Hello, this is my first post here. I know that I’m not officially diagnosed with any specific anxiety disorders, but dealing with a lot I've been under of stress lately from my obsessive thoughts. It started around seven years ago when I started worrying about sinning going to hell. For every little mistake I made I would often make a little prayer to God in my mind to ask for forgiveness for the things that I did, regardless of how minor they were. It quickly got to the point where I would even apologise for thinking things that I didn’t even mean (such as hating God, my family, etc) and ever since then not a day has gone by where I haven’t had these thoughts. I wish it stopped there, but that isn’t the only obsession I developed, as five years ago I began obsessing over certain conspiracy theories. Most people would likely just ignore this stuff, but I just couldn’t let myself do that. Instead, I spent so many hours of my life looking as deeply into these theories as I could just so I wouldn’t be closed minded to any potentially mind blowing evidence that would shatter my preconceived notions. This has led to my latest obsession which has taken hold over the past two years, and especially so over the past few months. I’ve made myself go down numerous rabbit holes regarding “human nature” which have led to me discovering some pretty terrible claims made about women, people of colour, LGBT people, and so on. Sometimes people would put forward scientific articles that supported claims such as “women only loving men for their looks/money,” or “people of different ethnicities having lower or higher iqs.” I also managed to find scientific articles which provided evidence against these claims, but I would then make myself check to see if anyone had responded to these articles (sometimes they did and sometimes they didn’t). I understand that it is important to be open minded to other evidence, but this has just been exhausting. It’s even bled into my personal life as well. I’ll sometimes just be doing something I enjoy when suddenly a little thought enters my head relating to a specific group of person. Sometimes I fight against it and it goes away, but usually I cave into this urge, look up a specific topic, and try to address it the best I can, which doesn't always make me feel better. I don't know what to do at this point. I just want all of these thoughts to go away, but nothing I do works. Is there any way I can get rid of my obsessions?

The feeling of being bullied…

replies: 1

Hi everyone. I don’t know if anyone else has gone through these feelings but I feel like I’m being bullied. On the outside it probably doesn’t seem that way but to me that is what it feels like. I often take my kids to parties and social events where... View more

Hi everyone. I don’t know if anyone else has gone through these feelings but I feel like I’m being bullied. On the outside it probably doesn’t seem that way but to me that is what it feels like. I often take my kids to parties and social events where the kids will normally start picking on me. It might be that they circle around me and squirt me with water pistols. It might be they call me names and laugh. I know it’s an attention seeking thing but does anyone else get this, especially from kids. Even when I say stop they won’t. In any given social circumstance, I’m normally the oddball. I don’t particularly care but I do struggle socially with other people but that doesn’t stop me from doing or trying things. Advice would be appreciated. Thanks.

Laptop smell; dangerous?

replies: 5

My laptop's been emitting this soldery type smell for a few weeks and (very stupidly) I've been procrastinating getting it looked at and used it now and again to secure documents in case it dies. Every time I use it I get a slight headache and feel a... View more

My laptop's been emitting this soldery type smell for a few weeks and (very stupidly) I've been procrastinating getting it looked at and used it now and again to secure documents in case it dies. Every time I use it I get a slight headache and feel a bit funny in my head, even if I don't smell it, and it's just dawned on me...what if it's from whatever's been causing the smell? What if I've been inhaling some toxic substance from something burning in my computer? There's been no visible smoke or anything but I'm completely terrified. I'm really worried that it's too late and that whatever I've breathed in will give me cancer in the future. I've had a very long history with health anxiety, but this is a case where I don't know if I can chalk it up to that.

Sabotage my relationships by creating/overreacting to situations

replies: 3

Hi - I hope someone is out there who may understand the below. I’ve never shared this with anyone, but have to now. I have an ongoing habit of destroying romantic relationships - I was engaged and purposely destroyed it by being down and focusing on ... View more

Hi - I hope someone is out there who may understand the below. I’ve never shared this with anyone, but have to now. I have an ongoing habit of destroying romantic relationships - I was engaged and purposely destroyed it by being down and focusing on stupid things to get angry about, and only focusing on the bad. I am currently following the same pattern with a guy I am dating. I get into wild headspaces and only focus on the bad and how bad the relationship is, and push him away and try and end it. it’s like part of me likes the pain and grief, or thinks I don’t deserve to be loved. I want a life so much different from the one I keep creating for myself.

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Loneliness and my thought patterns

replies: 13