OCD and intrusive/aggressive/taboo thoughts - I feel like this is not talked about a lot?

[jemma09]

Hi everyone, I hope you are having a peaceful day 🙂

I noticed this anxiety section of the forum says we can also talk about OCD. I heard about intrusive, aggressive or taboo thoughts associated with OCD only maybe a year or two ago after reading about it on some article. I never knew it was something to do with OCD. I remember reading one person explain that they found a lot of peace when they accepted their thoughts were in fact intrusive and did not define them as a person or what they wanted in life. I wish this was talked about more.

Does anyone experience these?

I never thought there was a name for it. I would have the most random thought just present itself in my head. (It's not so bad now after learning it is part of OCD, I thought I was a horrible person. I couldn't understand why it was happening.) A thought that might be intrusive or taboo and something that I would never do. Sometimes my mind would say to me - 'what if you did this?' 'or what if you were this?' usually referring to negative connotations. It would make me feel horrific and within myself because I knew I am not someone who would do any of the things that were being asked of me. These thoughts were always against my very soul and being and nothing like who I am as a person. I felt so alone and didn't understand why my brain was doing this. It would upset me so much each time. But finding out other people experienced it too was so comforting. I've never talked to a therapist about it because I was so worried I would be labelled as insane or as someone who would commit crimes or be a danger in society.

Thank you so much for reading and listening 🙂

[Summer Rose]

Hi Jemma

OCD is a really complex disorder that is sometimes misunderstood by society and even some health professionals. I read recently (ABC news on line, 14/10/21) that it can take some people up to a decade to receive a correct diagnosis. Imagine the frustration and distress!

Finding the right person to help you is critical. While I’m sorry that your initial experience seeking support wasn’t helpful, I really want to encourage you not to give up.

If you Google “OCD Clinician Network” you will find a very useful site aiming to help Australians living with OCD find the right treatment.

I wish you all the best as you work toward healing.

Kind thoughts to you

[quirkywords]

Jemma thanks for starting this thread and being honest with your thoughts.

It is so helpful to hear people talk about their experiences.

Thanks to petal and Geoff for their posts.

[geoff]

Hello Jemma, check it only pops up in very specific areas, yes, that's right because you don't go to a friends door to check whether or it's locked several times, you leave it alone in contrast to your own door lock.

The list you write down you may do this over and over again, altering, crossing out to finally making a new list, changing what's on top and adding in new points, however, some people are unable to change any points.

To be perfect is a trait of OCD, so is hoarding, but no one can be perfect, it's only done so as we believe to ourselves that it is perfect.

Best wishes.

Geoff.

[Gambit87]

Hi Jemma,

I cannot relate to your post enough.

My psych says I have OCD tendencies.

I used to get absolutely brutal intrusive thoughts revolving around hurting myself, hurting others (including my girlfriend) and more. Thoughts that would absolutely disgust me and it would tear me up inside and I would beat myself up badly (mentally) for having these thoughts. It left me mentally exhausted.

On my very first session with my psych - I broke down with all this. She smiled and said - there is nothing wrong with you and heres why and we started talking about intrusive thoughts and what fuels them. I felt so much better after that.

I've learnt that intrusive thoughts are just thoughts that were being fueled by my anxiety. I've learnt not to react because if you react to a thoughts, it lets your brain know its important so your brain send your more! I label them as fake news.

Since getting my anxiety under control with the help of my psych, I rarely have an intrusive thought! and if one pops in I know how to deal with it.

I feels so liberating being back in the drivers seat of my mind. I know that my depression and anxiety are in the back seat but I feel in control.

[ihateocd]

Having intrusive thoughts are extremely hard to understand and you are not alone

[ihateocd]

Yep.  Went to jail for this @@@#ing illness