Help with Anxiety

[T_93]

Hi there,

im not really sure what to do ( previously wrote this in another forum but wasn’t sure I did it right)

I don’t want to worry my family anymore as they know I have battled with anxiety and really bad depression in the past and feel as though I need to work it out on my own.

i just started a new job in customer service, and it is making me feel sick to my stomach...I get so scared I’m going to get into trouble or something bad will happen plus I think I hate dealing with people and how rude they can be.
My anxiety is almost getting the better of me but I’m trying to fight it and remain as calm as I can possibly be! Iv started waking up weird hours of the night thinking about the new job and all I am thinking about is the job but then my thoughts start to escalate and I think about a whole bunch of other things and bad things that I have gone through and tell myself I am failing and I’m not good enough....Iv been told I put pressure on myself and I believe that I do a little bit.
however, I just hate feeling this way because there are so many people out there that have much worse problems and I feel I am being selfish and not grateful for the blessing I have in my life. I am gay and my family are so supportive and incredible and same with my friends. I’m just not sure what to do and wonder if anyone has any advise.
thank you for whoever is reading this and sorry for the rant!

T.

[romantic_thi3f]

Hi T.

Welcome to the forums and thank you for being here and opening up to us.

Your post shows me that there's a little part of you that believes your problems matter too, even if you've given us so many reasons why they shouldn't! There isn't a ladder to me of who gets the right to be upset and who doesn't, and people can have all the blessings in the world and it's still okay for them to have anxiety or depression too.

It is good though that you can recognise the blessings since gratitude can be a big one in helping with depression. I practice this too.

Is there any evidence whatsoever that you might get into trouble?

Sometimes being anxious can be a good thing because it means you care about your job and want to do the best you can, but if it's overwhelming it's good to be able to reach out. Would it be worth asking your manager/boss for some feedback on how things are going so far?

I hope you find some support here 🙂

rt

[Not_Batman]

Hi T.93

Thanks for posting, and connecting with us. Going it alone is not something i recommend, however if there is nobody close you can talk to, the BB community is here.

Everyone is different, and will experience things differently in their lifetime, and worrying about every little thing can make your mind very tired, which impacts your mental health. There were a lot of times where i was worried about things well beyond my control, which made me spend a lot of time on things that weren't important. Having a little bit of OCD doesn't help either.

There was a time when my vacuum wouldn't work, which gave me great anxiety, because i just had to get the floor clean. I didnt have a grasp on what was priority 1 or priority 100, to me it was all priority 1.

trying some sort of cognitive behaviour therapy (CBT) can work wonders on your thought pattern. Have you spoken to your doctor about a mental health plan?

i think romantic_thi3f has some good points there too. Feedback can be great for motivation and self esteem.

Not_Batman

[Sweesoft]

Hi there,

I know what you mean when you say you don't want to trouble them anymore. However, they have to know what you are still going through. And along with that, you are right, fight your own fight is the right mindset but also acknowledge help. Have you tried to ask for professional help?

[T_93]

Thank you for your response...

yeah it does get overwhelming at times. I think because I want to do great And have big dreams but also because it’s not the desired job I want to do but telling myself it is a stepping stone to get me to where I want to be.

I just doubt myself a lot. There isn’t any evidence I’d get into trouble, I just expect I would because in the past I have gotten into a little bit of trouble for making constant mistakes at work ( for nothing bad) just human errors but that’s also because I am a very slow learner and it takes me a while to get used to something.

[T_93]

Thank you for your reply and support!

I have seen a doctor in the past and was on anti-depressants but stop about a year ago because I felt I didn’t need to take them anymore.
but now I’m question maybe I need to look at going back onto them! Do you think ? I think I know what my triggers are but it’s hard to deal when they are triggered

[Not_Batman]

Hi T.93

i’ll be on antidepressants for the rest of my life, im pretty sure if that. The dose may change, which ok, but that is for my doctor to decide. But These are only 1 part of the equation though. They dont completely stop the anxiety or the depression, or the intrusive thoughts and feelings that trigger them...but they help

it takes other things like CBT and mindfulness, self care to be able to learn (Or re learn) the skills to cope.

there was another thread where a member said “the pill, the will, the skill”, and that is pretty much it in a nutshell. The pill is only 1 factor.
your will drives the learning to learn the skill. The skill comes from many places, but CBT and talking to a psychologist are what get the wheels rolling. As it was explained to me about getting better, the pill is 10% and you are the 90%.

think of the saying ‘give a person a fish, they will eat for a day, teach the person to fish And they eat for a lifetime’

the same can be said for the CBT. Someone can give you advise which helps for a short term, but actually learning the skills builds a foundation that you can add to and adapt.

im sorry for all the analogy's. But they help me to understand.

PS...im not saying for one second that the advice and support on BB is short term, i have learned a lot from this network.

Not_Batman

[T_93]

No that is great help!

So would you suggest seeing someone? I think about it and I avoid it...I hate talking about my problems but perhaps that’s what I need to do and commit to doing it in order to help myself in the long run.

thank you for the incredible advise!

[Not_Batman]

Hi T.93

There are other sources like BB, and lifeline, that can assist, but you need to take that first step. if you find it is affecting you or your daily life, and you are unsure of how to deal with it, then yes i would look into seeing someone.

as an example, i had many sessions of CBT and ACT with my psychologist. After 6 months of no sessions, i had a panic attack again because something triggered it so i felt i had to go back for a session. This session was to help me recognise the trigger, and learn how to deal with it in the future.

Try not to be scarred of talking to a GP, psychiatrist, or psychologist about your problems. Be open and honest with them.

I wish you the best of strength.

Not_Batman