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Going backwards
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Good morning.
I had severe depression resulting from bypass surgery in 2015.
I spent some time in a i will call it a rehab ward for mental health conditions.
I never fully recovered and am still on medication today.
Recently work has had a change in management positions that are on the verge of bullying.
In the first 18 months of this job management supported a 9 day fortnight for me which was great for my mental health and lifestyle. Recently there has been a change in management with staff here being promoted and have now taken away my rest day and try to force me to start early and work longer when it suites them.
The way they talk I feel like I am not doing my job properly and being pushed into the now non social managements wants.
I go home from work and drink and stress constant headaches I don't go anywhere even if invited.
I don't do the things I used to I don't answer phone even if it's family at time my sleep is all over the place constantly down and stressed that i am being pushed out of my job.
Where will I get another job at 62 years old.
I have constant headaches and at times just start crying I am worried I will be back to the ward situation again the way I am going.
Same thing family ask if I'm ok the answer is always, I am fine.
Beyond blue were my saviour back then and I even did a Fund raiser for them which friends supported raising nearly 10k.
I do not want to go back to that state where had failed attempt on my life.
It was a very dark time and am falling back into it with self-isolation, no friends because I don't go anywhere sit at home in the dark usually with curtains drawn hoping no one turns up or rings.
This comes from our new management that went from supporting the healthy living 9 day fortnight to now the same ones taking it away.
They have no idea how that day would help me to build up for the next week.
They know of my conditions and will not allow me to continue on a fair work agreement that was not long ago recommended we do.
I have had days off where I just couldn't face to go out the door let alone into work.
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Dear Member~
Welcome back to the Forum, I"m glad it made a difference back then and expect it will now, you are among understanding friends. Life has handed you a hard time, both physically and mentally, and with your job circumstances. I'm glad you are back to find other people's views and experiences Very sensible.
I hope your bypass surgery was a 100% success and not something you need to worry about now.
You also need not worry about having changed since then and needing medication. I take it and expect I always will.
It is pretty obvious from your post that you are familiar wiht the reactions one has to depression: isolation, lack of motivation, crying and trying to take one's life, at the same time putting on a mask saying all is well.
This sounds very familiar to my own experiences. I am a different person now, however it took, time, therapy, medication and support - plus a biggie - leaving my job that was the root cause.
I do not know your circumstances, just that you are 62. Although you may consider it unrealistic I do not beleive any job is worth deep depression and a person's life and if I understand correctly that is what has happened before and may possibly happen again.
I would hope that you are getting clinical assistance with the depression, and that you can say to them that the current treatment is not working, you are not able to cope with the new management and enforced extra work ad the effects on you are severe. A great pity as you had achieved a balance, and now that has been removed.
It may be possible to approach the Fair Work Ombudsman over the failure to stick to the agreement
May I ask if you have family or a friend who could be a support? I know all the time I kept things to myself my depression and anxiety simply got worse. It was only with other people's help I started to -and continued -to improve. That mask did me no good in the long run, hiding who I was simply postponed matters and made them worse as a result.
To provide for any dispute please see if you can get medical certificates for the days you have had to take off -yes I know, not always practical. Maybe talk it over with your clinician.
If you would like to come back and talk some more that would be great
Croix
