Drug Induced Daily Anxiety

[DassaJassa]

Hello readers
Here is my story...
I'm a 22 year old Male who has been struggling with daily anxiety and now depression as a result.
Around 4 months ago, I was using the Illicit drug methamphetamine with a friend, I never regularly experimented with this substance, let's say every few months we'd set aside a few days and have a bender with mutual friends. Maybe 10 times in my lifetime, max. I was a regular weed smoker and on occasion ecstasy, so we can establish I wasn't a model citizen. I was caught up in the fun and it was common practice with my friends, this is my main regret, I can't undo it, i wish I could now, with that said, let me tell you about my incident.

That night, 4 months ago, after smoking quite a large amount of the drug ice, not knowing at the time how much was too much as I generally thought I could handle it and having been awake for possible 48 hours? Hard to say considering how long ago it was, I then proceeded to smoke some weed, which this wasn't a new thing, I often would mix drugs without incident. I proceeded to have a shower, shortly after getting in i began to feel really uncomfortable in the chest, my focus was then drawn to my heart-rate, being on a stimulant, it was racing, I immediately left the shower, got dressed and entered my roommates room, complaining of chest pain and concerned, he said not to worry, that i was just "paz". the intensity increased and I began having problems breathing, and was convinced I was having a heart attack, I demanded he call 000, After a half an hour wait with me on the ground, fearing I was about to die, I was taken to hospital, they diagnosed an overdose. I was sent home and since then, have had daily chest pains, chest tightness, constant palpitations and pounding heart, headaches, random pains, constant fear of having another incident, panic and various other terrifying symptoms. After countless visits to GP's, I was referred to a psychologist, I'm on my sixth session and it does help, I have longer periods without losing control but I'm still struggling. I've been considering antidepressants since it was recommended by the GP months ago but I'm really worried about it making me feel worse in the initial weeks, my symptoms already terrify me, particularly heart related one's. I've read myself into hysteria about side effects, what's worse, my parents aren't even aware of any of this, for their own sake. I just don't see myself ever being normal again, I fear this is permanent

[Lukesydney]

Hey Joey,

Had a similar incident a few weeks ago after having some coke and not a regular user. Jus let a one off party. Since I have been feeling anxious and struggling daily to get to work and concentrate.

Reading here to see what others are experiencing and if anyone found any help.

[Joey123]

Hey Luke

Sorry I haven’t checked this post in a while; I guess when things get better we forget the tough times and move on. I will be monitoring this now just incase I can help someone out bec when I went through it all I wanted was some help.

I know exactly what you are going through mate because a few months ago I was there myself; but trust me when I say things gets better and go back to normal.

ill detail my experience so you can relate:

The next day after waking up my heart was pounding literally out of my chest and I didn’t feel right. it wasn’t the same feeling as when Ive been hungover.

I spent the next 2 days sleeping on the couch. After the two days the insomnia started; I would go to bed and be awake within 2 hours. I would spend the night with all these rapid random thoughts which I couldn’t control. This lasted around 4 days after which I broke down and told my wife what I had done. My wife was awesome in supporting me.

I went to my GP and told her everything. She prescribed some sleeping pills as I was extremely exhausted and hadn’t slept in days.

After that first week I went back to work but still I wasn’t feeling right. I was restless, anxious, couldn’t focus, would go to the toilet and cry, get home and cry, couldn’t relax or do things I did before.

This lasted around 3 months, the 3 worst months of my life. Within the 3 months I had been regularly seeing a doctor, phycologist, doing meditation, going gym etc all helped a little but nothing fixed it.

Eventually I told my mother and in-laws of what I am going through. Again no one judged as I thought they would. they all just helped. This was one of the best decisions I made. I found my brother in law had gone through EXACTLY the same thing years before so seeing him normal gave me hope. I also got guidance on what he went through and how he got better.

My father in law took me to a doctor friend of his who prescribed me with anti depressants and benzodiazepines. I was very reluctant to take them honestly bec these meds have side affects and can become addictive; however I was SOO desperate for help I took them. I was very strict in monitoring how I took the meds and slowly tapered off to where now I have not used any for months and feel myself again.

hows life now - we’ll better, I have learnt a lot about myself. I take care of not only my physical health but mental health also. I exercise, meditate, yoga etc. I don’t drink often and will never try a drug again.

IT GETS BETTER!

[Billyc]

Hey Joey 123,

thanks for sharing your experience.

3 years ago I took ice for about 6 months behind my wife’s back.

we separated and I pretty much lost everything.

Ive been hiding in a dark space since then, I couldn’t leave the house.

until recently when I tried to go back to work. The first day was horrible. I had trembles all over my body, I couldn’t hold a cup of coffee as I would just spill it. I lasted 2 months and started not showing up.

Eventually they ran out of patience and terminated my contract.

I’ve stayed in touch with the company as they said they enjoyed having me around and said I did some really good work, but I just couldn’t get passed the crippling anxiety, I would stay in the toilet for a while just to escape the open plan office.

They mentioned upon a new position opening, theyed like to talk with me again subject to where I’m at head space wise.

So there’s opportunities ahead, wing on hear and reading all these shared experiences is amazing..

thankyou very much

very best

[Lukesydney]

Hey Joey,

Thanks for coming back on and sharing. Happy for you that its cleared up and also that there is hope for us all that this shall pass.

I know like me, many others will be doing endless google searching to try and find an "answer" I started a blog to track all the things I have tried, a bit like yourself (Yoga, Meditation, vitamins and so on)

I have since gone on an SSRI also. VERY RELUCTANT, as I don't want to be on something long term. But was probably for the best short term, I'm no longer crying randomly, anxiety is pretty well gone too.

My brain fog is still there, but it's not stopping me at work. Looking forward to the brain fog clearing and eventually tapering off.

Thanks again for coming back and sharing your update. I think it will mean the world for sufferers like myself.

[Findingpeace]

Thanks for the post and updating on your mental well being!

i also, rarely ever did drugs,

however in November while intoxicated had drugs,

then had a very stressful break up in the Same weekend. I already was diagnosed with GAD, however had been off my Ssri for a year, now I’m back on my ssri and still suffering from daily anxiety and aggitation. With every panic attack, I question if this is the one where I finally crack.

Any suggestions In my endeavour? I’m taking medication, trying to keep busy at work, excercising and mediate when possible. My physical symptoms are debilitating.

[Lukesydney]

HI Findingpeace,

Not sure what you have tried so far and what your symptoms are. Maybe list those and others might be able to make some helpful suggestions aswell. Things do take time to work, you do need to hang in there.

Meditation takes time and is a new skill, I think even with what you are going through it's a worthwhile thing to stick at if you can. I'm personally finding it hard todo it every day also, as I'm choosing sleep over meditation, but am looking to do it more often myself.

Have you tried seeing a psychologist? Even calling Beyond Blue, sometimes talking through your symptoms with someone as opposed to reading it on the internet can help you. I have found talking about how im feeling and some of my thoughts helps, as people can help rationlise.

Also going back to your GP, as there is a number of different SSRI's and other options if the SSRI isn't helping.

[Ryan7272]

Hey mate how are you now??

I am going through the same stuff now.

Has it got better for you now?

I am really struggling still I’m nit sure what to do!

[Ryan7272]

Hey mate , I’m having the same problems as the first post.

I have tried antidepressants but they make me angry and I’m not myself.

I have panic attacks daily now . I’ve been in hospital most weeks thinking I’m having a heart attack . It’s embarrassing. I did a stress test in my heart the other week and I’m really healthy. It’s only from reading this post I’ve realised what’s happening to me.

My life is stuffed now , I can’t do anything. I’m always tired massive headaches .

so you think meditation is the best way? What about hypnosis??

[Billyc]

Hi Ryan,

i know what you mean by you feel like your life is stuffed.

i too get the panic attacks, I’ve started work again, and it’s very hard to remain even keeled,

i had horrible anxiety today, but I’m pushing on with it, I’m going to take the stand that this is going to stay with me and there is not a lot I can do about it, other than manage it and keep trying to work hard...

i did a bulk of work while dealing with this, and came out the other end. Feeling proud of what I achieved.. that to me is the best cure, You just have to put a few days of hard work under your belt at a time, small wins.. and don’t forget to pat yourself on the shoulder and remind yourself that your life is not stuffed, find a way to start liking yourself again.. I’m learning to get rid of shame I feel.

[Lukesydney]

Hey Ryan,

Sorry to hear you are feeling this way also. I have had a couple of panic attacks before, but mainly around certain scenarios. But nothing where I have ended up in hospital, must be pretty freighting.

I am of the belief that the brain can repair itself in time. I still have the foggiest head and some days are harder then others, but I believe the things I have changed in my life are helping. I'm also learning to live with it. I need plenty of rest, steering clear of big nights with the boys and other changes in lifestyle.

I've spoken to a few people who have come out the other side and functioning again.

1. Meditation & Focus on your breathing - I used to not be able to sit for long enough and feel like Im not getting anywhere with it. But it takes time and is a new skill. I actually enjoy it now.

Look up the apps on your phone insight timer and headsapce. Both have 7 days free and teach you the basics. From there you can either go onto spotify or youtube for free for your daily practice. I have splurged and invested in insight timer.

The skills of focusing on your breathing can help you get to sleep, maybe even when you a having panic attack.

Give yourself time and go easy on yourself.

2. Yoga - I was daunted by going into a classroom full of women, but once I got a few classes under my belt it became easier. Again helps you focus on breathing and stretching.

3. Get a referral for a psychologist.
Medicare give you up to 10 visits subsidized. It's still not cheap and may not be a feasible option. But they can help you with your panic attacks and give you ways to work through them.

The advice I give to everyone, don't be afraid to pick up the phone to beyond blue. Talking to people really does help.

4. Try different methods
What works for me, might not work for you. So get out and try some things. Hypnosis is worth a shot for sure. There is a thing called Breath work and freedom techniques. Reflexology and Massage is also a great way to relax.

5. Pharma -
On the big pharma side there is a whole bunch of other options too, speak to your GP again. Things can take months to work. First 8 weeks on my SSRI i was feeling more anxious than ever, feeling like Ive had a line of Speed and charging. Couldn't sleep, feeling like spewing, it was horrible. But it's all cleared up now, except for a bit of sexual dysfunction, which Im hoping will calm down too.

Report back in mate, keep us up to date with your progress.