Drug Induced Daily Anxiety

DassaJassa · ‎07-11-2016

Hello readers
Here is my story...
I'm a 22 year old Male who has been struggling with daily anxiety and now depression as a result.
Around 4 months ago, I was using the Illicit drug methamphetamine with a friend, I never regularly experimented with this substance, let's say every few months we'd set aside a few days and have a bender with mutual friends. Maybe 10 times in my lifetime, max. I was a regular weed smoker and on occasion ecstasy, so we can establish I wasn't a model citizen. I was caught up in the fun and it was common practice with my friends, this is my main regret, I can't undo it, i wish I could now, with that said, let me tell you about my incident.

That night, 4 months ago, after smoking quite a large amount of the drug ice, not knowing at the time how much was too much as I generally thought I could handle it and having been awake for possible 48 hours? Hard to say considering how long ago it was, I then proceeded to smoke some weed, which this wasn't a new thing, I often would mix drugs without incident. I proceeded to have a shower, shortly after getting in i began to feel really uncomfortable in the chest, my focus was then drawn to my heart-rate, being on a stimulant, it was racing, I immediately left the shower, got dressed and entered my roommates room, complaining of chest pain and concerned, he said not to worry, that i was just "paz". the intensity increased and I began having problems breathing, and was convinced I was having a heart attack, I demanded he call 000, After a half an hour wait with me on the ground, fearing I was about to die, I was taken to hospital, they diagnosed an overdose. I was sent home and since then, have had daily chest pains, chest tightness, constant palpitations and pounding heart, headaches, random pains, constant fear of having another incident, panic and various other terrifying symptoms. After countless visits to GP's, I was referred to a psychologist, I'm on my sixth session and it does help, I have longer periods without losing control but I'm still struggling. I've been considering antidepressants since it was recommended by the GP months ago but I'm really worried about it making me feel worse in the initial weeks, my symptoms already terrify me, particularly heart related one's. I've read myself into hysteria about side effects, what's worse, my parents aren't even aware of any of this, for their own sake. I just don't see myself ever being normal again, I fear this is permanent

blondguy · ‎07-11-2016

Hello DassaJassa

Welcome to the forums and good on you for having the strength to post!

Im sorry to hear about you being in the anxiety spot you are. It is a painful place to be in. I must say well done to you for being so self aware and pro-active to have your GP and a psychologist set up to help you recover. I understand what you are going through as my first mega anxiety attacks started when I was 23.

The good news is that the intensity of the anxiety will decrease over time with regular counselling. For me weekly counselling really helped for a minimum of six months and then back onto fortnightly. This really took the edge off the attacks big time.

Re AD's, they are a great healer for me (after I wasted 10 years not taking them)as they provide a platform on which I could heal using the coping techniques from my psychologist at the time. They arent a fix all but they did take that awful edge off the anxiety within just a couple of weeks. The side effects were minimal. Dr Google can be an excellent resource but not where mental health is concerned as people's symptoms and requirements are all different. The internet can even exacerbate our anxiety which is the last thing we want.

Anxiety is not permanent as the fear of the fear can be dealt with by your therpist thus replacing the fear with calm acceptance of the anxiety which will assist in decreasing the severity of the disorder (regular therapy)

Anxiety disorder is also partially a physical issue as well, so please dont think that its all psychological. The adrenaline pumping away is a chemical which does make it similar to a physical health issue Dassa.

Telling your parents about the anxiety might seem scary but it is a very common problem so when you are comfortable doing so it will take a lot of weight off your shoulders 🙂

The anxiety symptoms (feelings) are awful but they are harmless. Your heart is a lot tougher than you think and palpitations cant hurt you physically. Thats just the adrenaline gland working overtime because you are highly sensitised at the moment.

There are many kind people on the forums that suffer the same as yourself Dassa and can be here for you 🙂

Even if you just want a chat we are here for you. It would be great if you could stick around!

my kind thoughts for you

Paul

DassaJassa · ‎08-11-2016

Thank you for taking the time to read and share your experience, this has helped

blondguy · ‎09-11-2016

Hey Dassa

Thanks for posting back. I hope your pain is somewhat bearable.

Anxiety disorder may be common but its still a dreadful place to be in for sure.

you are not alone

Paul

big_J1 · ‎25-11-2016

Hi Dassa

Thanks for sharing your story and having the courage to do that, up until now I have lacked the courage to post so thought I would have a go.

My experience is nearly identical to yours except that it happened approx. twenty years ago. I was in my twenties at the time and doing similar drugs to you and one particular occasion when I hadn't slept for 48 hours or so because of amphetamines I decided to smoke some pot. Not too long after that smoke my life changed and then the terror started. I had panic attack after panic attack after panic attack and this is how my life continued. I too thought I was going too die and have a heart attack every time the attacks came. At the time I didn't know what was going on and I had no idea of what to do about it. It was a year or so later when I sought help and was diagnosed with an anxiety disorder. I too regretted the decisions I made back then in regards to drug use and that is why to this day I won't drink alcohol or use drugs. It is so good to hear that you have sought help immediately because the earlier the intervention the better the outcome can be.

I haven't had much experience with antidepressents so can't really comment there, One thing I wish I had done earlier though was talk to my parents about it, as hard as that sounds. I spent years trying to hide how I was feeling from them and this took up so much effort and energy. I did it alone for too long and in my opinion the more support the better.

Words will not do justice for the experiences and place you feel you are in and I wish you a healthy recovery. Thanks for inspiring me to share.

ashstanley · ‎28-07-2017

Hello DassaJassa,

I am currently going through something very similar. It has now hit the two month mark since I took what I thought was MDMA. It was my first use of any form of drug and it wasn't a pleasant experience either.

My symptoms hit almost instantly in which I would have multiple panic attacks daily and feel so out of body that it would increase my anxiety. Two months later and my anxiety symptoms begin from the moment I wake up to the minute I fall asleep. My vision is so off, my brain won't work, my heartbeat is out of this world, I temor, I have complete loss of appetite, loss of libido, and can't focus or think of anything. I was prescribed medication as my GP diagnosed me with severe anxiety/stress with reactive depression in which I had a huge allergic reaction, making me against any form of medication. I have had 1 session with a psychologist and am beginning exercise but I fear this will never go away.

Please update me on how you're going and steps you're taking to be on the right path. There are not many follow up or progression stories which makes me feel even more down.

Thanks.

ashstanley · ‎29-07-2017

Hello DassaJassa,

I am currently going through something very similar. It has now hit the two month mark since I took what I thought was MDMA. It was my first use of any form of drug and it wasn't a pleasant experience either.

My symptoms hit almost instantly in which I would have multiple panic attacks daily and feel so out of body that it would increase my anxiety. Two months later and my anxiety symptoms begin from the moment I wake up to the minute I fall asleep. My vision is so off, my brain won't work, my heartbeat is out of this world, I temor, I have complete loss of appetite, loss of libido, and can't focus or think of anything. I was prescribed medication as my GP diagnosed me with severe anxiety/stress with reactive depression in which I had a huge allergic reaction, making me against any form of medication. I have had 1 session with a psychologist and am beginning exercise but I fear this will never go away.Please update me on how you're going and steps you're taking to be on the right path. There are not many follow up or progression stories which makes me feel even more down.

Thanks.

geoff · ‎29-07-2017

hello Ashstanley, I am sorry for what you have been through, however what I would do is type in the search bar 'ask Dr.Kim', I think she is the one to be able to respond to your post, that doesn't mean that we aren't concerned because we are and want you to get all the appropriate help that is available. Geoff.

Joey123 · ‎27-11-2018

Hey all

I am currently going through a very similar experience. I tried some drugs 2 months ago and have had bad aniexty which led to depression since. I find it hard to concertrate on things such as work / homelife and thinking about upcoming events such as a trip overseas now give me aniexty. I have been suffering daily and just want to know how you guys are traveling now? if anything just for some hope as I’m losing a little everyday. Everyday I wake up hoping this nightmare is over but it’s just not going away.

Bunster · ‎19-03-2019

My daughter left home and spent six months in Brisbane frequenting Fortitude Valley party hotspots. My wife had to fly over when she was admitted to hospital with severe stomach cramps. They took her appendix out. There was nothing wrong with it. Then, in her early 20's, she became and anxious, depressed mess with chronic panic attack which she regularly called ambulances for. We had a good relationship and she fully blames her use of ecstasy for her current predicament. She has changed from the super relaxed, confident and beautiful young lady she was. My point I suppose is that she told us early on. That meant we are able to be more informed as parents without making judgments and flying blind as far as our support went. Talk to someone close or someone you can trust.