'dream-like' state

[44Max44]

The past few days I've felt like I've been in a 'dream-like' state, almost as if I'm living in a simulation of my life but not my actual life. I've found it extremely hard to think about or focus on anything other than my mental and physical health and constantly feel not quite all there mentally. I've found that I've been overly careless and just disinterested in most things. Usually talking to other people can help me break out of this state and bring me back to reality, but I can't do anything when I'm alone, so the night is especially daunting for me.

I really want to go to my GP and book a Mental Healthcare Plan and have been planning to for months now, but I never end up going down. I'm not really sure why I'm so hesitant to go, but I really want to. Going to the GP and talking about physical things I'm fine with, it's just the mental stuff I'm too worried to talk about.

I've tried to find similar posts on the forums about this type of issue, but none of them quite fit exactly what I'm experiencing, hence the new post. Sorry for all the posts I've made in the few days, there's just been a lot on my mind.



Any and all help is appreciated.

[Doolhof]

Hi Max,

Thanks for sharing your thoughts here. You may be helping other people by voicing your own concerns.

It can be difficult putting in words how we are feeling if we are in a vulnerable state. There are times when I don't understand my own depression.

I have found it helpful to write down how I am feeling. You may find a list on the internet that has a description of depression or general mental health issues you can relate to.

Write them down and hand the list to your Dr or put a list on your phone.

One time I actually took a pamphlet in with me that was describing depression and told the Dr that is how I was feeling.

It is advisable to book a double appointment for a Mental Health Care plan. They take a while to go through.

Maybe you can write out the steps you need to do to achieve this outcome:

- Book a double appointment with the Dr

- find words that describe how I feel

- remind self of how important keeping the appointment is

- take along a friend if that is possible (they can wait with you)

-have a distraction on your find to help fill in time

-remind yourself you are doing this to help yourself.

-attend the appointment and see where to from there.

Hope this has helped a little! My head can feel a little messed up after an appointment like that, so I sometimes go for a short walk before I head off anywhere else.

Cheers from Dools

[Ebi]

Hi 44Max44,

Further to Dools' comments, you could try looking up derealization and depersonalization to see if those descriptions help you to articulate and understand what you are experiencing.

Thinking of you, Ebi

[44Max44]

Thank you Doolhof and Eli, you helped me out a lot.
I will definitely do all the things you mentioned and will be going in to book my MHCP as soon as possible.
I googled 'derealization' and it sounds pretty similar to what I've been experiencing so I think that maybe what is happening. That's helped put my mind at ease knowing there's a logical explanation to what I'm feeling.

Thank you guys for the help 🙂

[Doolhof]

Hi Max,

The more I read information about my conditions the better I understand them.

Another great thing about this forum is realising that other people have similar experiences to us!

Quite often I have periods of time where I feel disconnected. A Psychologist suggested I look at mindfulness so I have tried that.

When I am out walking, I take photos on my mobile phone. It helps me to feel more grounded and connected to what is around me. Also helps to lighten my mood.

All the best with the Drs appointment. The Dr has probably seen people with lists of what is going on for them in the past, so you walking in with your list will probably make the Drs job easier!

All the best, please feel free to check in here any time.

Cheers from Dools

[44Max44]

I experienced another symptom of de-realization today, and it was pretty weird.
I read up on de-realization a couple of days ago, and one of the symptoms was 'elongated/shortened limbs', and this is what I experienced. I was with some friends, and I was feeling anxious and glanced down at my arm, which I thought looked weirdly long. I then looked at my legs and thought they might be too short.
I then checked all my friends one by one, and sure enough, all of their arms looked slightly longer than usual.

The conversation then switched to something else and I actually got engaged with that conversation and then realized that everyone's limbs including my own looked completely normal again.

I wouldn't say it was scary because I knew exactly what I was experiencing, but it was definitely very concerning especially because problems to do with my eyes and vision are my worst fear.

I've been taking your advice and writing down every symptom I've been experiencing so I can hand that into my GP instead of having to memorize everything. My local GP which is a 2 minute ride from me is open until 10pm every day so I at least feel at ease knowing I can go down there whenever I'd like pretty much.

[44Max44]

I've also noticed that in the past week or so I've just been going down the exact same road I went down a few months back when I first had a run in with Health Anxiety.

The first thing that happened was I got a heart palpitation after a big bike ride and my heart was racing, so my mind instantly started freaking out and I just sat down until I calmed myself down at which point I was fine, but I still had that thought in the back of my head saying 'what if it's heart problems?'
annnd it just spiraled from there. Since then, I've worried about having anything from eye problems, stomach problems, throat problems, brain problems and so on... it's exactly what I did a few months ago... it starts off as one semi-traumatic experience which then spirals out of control and before you know it I think I have every health problem known to man...

I'm really looking forward to my chat with the GP, I can't keep going through the same thing over and over.

[Doolhof]

Hi Max,

My mind runs away with so many thoughts as well. Stress and anxiety cause me to think of one issue, that then turns into another until I have dragged up every issue that has been a problem since the time I was able to remember such things.

My health anxiety issues are quite different from yours. Due to my depression and suicidal thoughts, I often wish my minor complaints were serious and would be fatal. My mind tells me that a headache could turn into a brain tumour, irritable bowel could be cancer, heart burn could mean a heart attack...and my sick mind is disappointed that is not the case!

It is great you have a medical centre in your area you can readily access. It takes me 3 weeks to get in to see my Dr. They do have emergency appointments available now and then.

You mentioned you were able to calm yourself down once you realised you were not having a heart attack and also that your mind adjusted again once the conversation changed resulting in you seeing everyone's arms as being the right length.

Our minds are amazing complex organs. It is great you have been able to have a concept of reality! Hopefully yo can hold onto that and put it in place when your mind starts to take you on a trip.

Do you have an appointment booked with your GP? Hope it is soon so you can get some advice from him or her.

All the best, cheers from Dools

[44Max44]

Hi Doolhoof, thank you for the advice one again.

The past few days have definitely been a rollercoaster of emotion for me. Every day I seem to come up with a new thing that 'could' be wrong about me. I can't even look at myself without seeing something I think isn't right...
I woke up this morning and went to blow my nose and saw a little bit of blood, which kicked me into high gear first thing in the morning because I instantly assumed that it was cancer because that's one of my top fears... I'm not so much worried now as it hasn't bled at all since and doesn't hurt at all, but it was still really scary nonetheless.

This however finally pushed me to go to my GP and book a MHCP for Monday as well as a normal appointment just to get my nose checked out tomorrow.

It's very unfortunate that you have to wait 3 weeks to get a visit with your GP... I guess I never knew just how good I have it just being able to go down and visit mine at any time.



I really appreciate the replies Dool, you've helped put my mind at ease again and again and I'm very thankful for that. I hope you and I both can get through this A-okay.

[Doolhof]

Hi Max,

There may be many reason why you blew some blood out of your nose. I am certainly not a medical person but do presume the possibilities could me multiple. Hopefully your Dr will have some answers for you.

I'm wondering, when your mind tells you there is possibly something very wrong with you, can you listen to your thoughts then try and think of some rational reasons?

I'm not saying there may not be anything wrong, it is always best o get yourself checked by the Dr to ensure you are okay.

We do have a hospital in our region, so if you are desperate after 6.00 p.m. you can go there and the staff will call a Dr in as there are no Drs at the hospital usually. There are a few emergency appointments at the medical centre as well.

Hope the appointment on Monday goes well. Also hope you don't stress too much about that appointment before it happens.

I'm going to be away from Friday to Monday visiting family for Father's day. It takes nearly 5 hours to get to my parent's place. I won't have connection to the forum while I am away.

Hope your weekend goes well and you are able to find ways to deal with any health issues and anxiety that come up.

Cheers from Dools