Anxiety & Religion

[Beckinson1]

While I have been raised in a non religious household and do not deep down believe I am religious, the idea of a higher being causes me a lot of fear and subsequent anxiety. Particularly when I have OCD type thoughts or thoughts which are in disagreement to certain religious ideologies I suffer terrifying anxiety and worry a higher being will cause me intolerable pain or will punish me e.g. give me a terminal illness, make my boyfriend cheat on me, cause harm to family etc.

I think what makes this type of anxiety trigger so hard for me to combat is the underlying thought that if a higher being does exist,  they would be able to cause me suffering regardless e.g. With normal anxiety I could tell myself statistically it is unlikely my friend will get hit by a car tomorrow however, if worrying about a higher being this becomes difficult because a higher being could theoretically make the improbable happen whenever they wanted. Often to relieve myself of this kind of anxiety I will silently ask for forgiveness in my head however, I am trying to break that habit as it only seems to fuel more unwanted thoughts. 

I know religion is a common element in OCD type anxiety and wanted to know whether anyone else had similar types of thoughts and any helpful tips to help me deal with this? I wish to make clear I do not want to offend anyone and respect all religions, I am just hoping anyone, from any belief backgrounds who suffer from higher being driven anxiety like I do could provide me with some much needed assistance.

 Thank you.

[JessF]

Hello Beckinson, have you heard of a type of therapy called Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT)? There is a really good book about it called The Happiness Trap that I can recommend.

ACT therapy differs from other types of therapies in that instead of teaching us to try and fight with or challenge negative beliefs or thoughts, it's about accepting that they exist in your head and acknowledging that they are just that: thoughts in your head, made up of words. It's a distancing technique, and I have found it can be very useful when your thoughts have got past the point where it's worth having a debate about them - you know that they're untrue, or possibly delusional, and engaging with them is just draining your energy and making you more upset.

An example of how some of these defusion techniques work: for example, you have the thought "God is going to punish me." Instead of entering into a debate with yourself about whether God would do that, or even if God exists, you say, "I'm having the thought that God is going to punish me." 

Another way to do it is to name it as a story. So you have the "God is going to punish me" thought, and you say, "Oh that's the Vengeful God Story again."

Last one... and this is right out of the book, it may sound silly, but it is surprisingly useful in shifting your perspective on the importance of a thought: put it to music. Sing the thought in your head to the tune of "happy birthday" or some other frivolous or cheerful melody.

Do you think you could perhaps give some of these a try?  Ultimately, the fact that your obsessive thoughts are God-based is not the central issue. They are still obsessive thoughts. You'll see a lot of threads here with people experiencing the same levels of anxiety and fear about different types of thoughts, and the remedies of dealing with them can work just as well no matter what the subject.

[Paul]

Hi Beckinson,

I am a big fan of what JessF has described. I use the techniques myself to bring myself out of the initial fall if I feel I am getting depressed. It's very helpful.

Sometimes it's difficult to use this method because of racing thoughts and feelings, that's where a simple exercise before you grab the thoughts as JessF described helps.

Using as many senses as possible, what can you see, really really look around and describe to yourself what you can see. Then what can you hear, listen very carefully to what you can hear. If your thoughts race, that's OK, just let them race away and try not to talk back to them for now. What can you smell and what can you feel. Are you sitting? how does the chair feel against your back, is the small of your back touching the chair? Where are your hands? what can they feel?

This exercise helps to ground us, it's a bit like relaxation. It also helps us with what JessF has described because  a big part of it is looking at the thoughts and feelings, examining them giving them the name or singing at them.

Let us know how you go.

Paul

[john68]

hi beckinson1, Yes, religious themes do appear to be a common theme for people experiencing anxiety or OCD type symptoms. My own background is deeply entrenched with all types of religious symbolism and mantras. Although it has been nearly 35 years since I broke away from the church (Via leaving my parent's home) I still have this mantra "Forgive me Father, for I have sinned" playing regularly in my mind when I am under stress, have thoughts of self harm etc.

Like you, I don't wish to say anything negative about people and their belief structure, but I believe that exposure to any extreme forms of belief system at an early age can have a detrimental effect on a person's ability to develop feelings of self worth. This can be similarly actualised through accessing popular media throughout adult life.  

When I was four years old my mother was in a break-away christian fellowship that saw Armageddon (i.e.. the second coming of Christ) as imminent. My days were filled with lectures on what would happen to me after the rapture because I was an evil child. Living in the tropics I witnessed a glorious fiery sunset and mistook it for a biblical sign (The sky shall be filled with the blood of the damned). That was my first nervous breakdown that I recall.

The best therapy I have experienced to deal with this is through exposure: Even though I have no faith (at least that I am willing to acknowledge), I sometimes go to church.I then go home and pick the pastor's sermon apart mentally. I watch documentaries on the life of Christ, and when a religious mantra plays in my head, I deliberately change the words to something silly or inane - maybe the name of Sesame Street characters. Sometimes it works. Not always

I wish there was a magic pill to help. God has always been in my life. When I deny him there is a big, black, empty hole in my soul and negative feelings of self worth. When the struggle becomes too much and I let him in for a short time, my anxiety, depression and Bi Polar symptoms spiral out of control

I wish you the best with your journey. Remember, it's not actually that important to you on a day to day basis whether God exists, It's whether you can look in the mirror and see the soul of an angel reflected back.

[Agnetha]

I have idea you can use as just option if you wish. This is what work for me sometime.  I look at God as  loving father who only want the best for me. When I choose to be close to him,  I have less fear. If I too distant, I lose trust. So it de[pend on your attitude to God, who you think he is. Good luck, I pray for you.

[pipsy]

Hi, I feel religion is a very personal, private belief.  If you choose to believe in a higher power and it works, then obviously that's right for you.  I do belong to a church but I'm finding lately, like john68, once I get home, I'm mentally repeating the scripture taught that day.  Some of the beliefs of the church are hard to address to today's living because people today are different to what we're told they were like when the bible was in it's infancy.  Some people will tell you to mentally 'give your problems to the cross'.  If you can accomplish this and feel lighter, obviously you do have some form of belief.  The way our particular church teaches, they would have you believe that when you sin, you will be punished, the punishment being, you won't go to heaven when you pass.  They then go on to tell you, we commit sin everyday, just by the way we behave, talk, live etc.  If that's the case, heaven must be extremely lonely because earth is full of sinners.  Don't get me wrong, I'm not knocking any form of religion, this is just my understanding of a very complicated subject.  I've also found the biggest, most judgmental people are actually supposedly Christians.  I try hard not to judge, so where does that leave me?  I've always thought of myself as being Christian, but now I'm just confused.  Christians judge people who are gay, I don't because I don't feel I have the right to tell someone how they should live.  As long as what they're doing and how they live doesn't hurt me, I don't care what they do in their own home.  Christians look down their noses at prostitution, again, leave me out of it.  I wouldn't be happy if my partner went with a prostitute, but that's because he chose to be unfaithful, not because of who he went with.    

[Beckinson1]

Thanks Jess F, this is helpful. I am trying to work on at the moment not fuelling thoughts and instead let them sit more peacefully in the background. I am going to try hard with your techniques. 

[down_on_the_beach]

I know this anxiety