What else can I do to help?

[Zu]

For as long as I’ve known my friends quite a few of them have struggled a bit with their mental health. I tended to help them get help but since then I’ve moved far away and it’s a lot harder to support them.

One of my my closest friends isn’t going very well again and I was hoping I could get advice on how to help her out.

She says she’s been breaking down, feels sad all the time and sometimes just starts crying for no reason. She also mentioned that the world feels fake. Like everything looks slightly blurry and strange, like she’s watching from a strangers eyes. I know I can’t know for sure but that last part sounds an awful lot like derealisation/depersonalisation. I felt a similar way a couple years back, I know how awful it feels and it really upsets me to know that she’s going through it too. Her mum was trying organise for her to see someone, but that was a couple weeks ago and my friend knows that its likely to not actually end up happening. I’ve told her to talk to someone at school or use one of the online services but she finds it difficult to ask others for help. I contacted her school and asked if they could help her, now I’m just waiting for a response.

Is there anything else I can be doing to support her?

[Sophie_M]

Hi Zu, it can be really difficult supporting someone from a distance.  It sounds like you're doing a good job by encouraging her to seek professional support from her school and online services.

We have some resources on how to support a friend on these pages, which we'd recommend having a read through for ideas and guidance:

Supporting a friend

The Check In app


Our other members will hopefully have some ideas as well. 
 

[romantic_thi3f]

Hi Zu,

Welcome to the forums and thanks for reaching out. I'm really glad that you're here and wanting to get some support for your friend; it sounds like she is very lucky to have you there.

I agree that it would be really good to get your friend some help, even though I do understand that it can be really difficult and it can be really scary. Would she want you to come with her maybe? That way you can give her a bit of support until she gets to know the counsellor.

You mentioned online services and I love that that's available. Is that something you could both do together too? Given that it's online you can both just hang out behind a computer, and if the conversation gets too tricky you can always end it. But at least that way it's a step in the right direction.

I hope some of this might be helpful; even if you feel like you're doing nothing, just being her friend while she's going through this is so supportive right now. Even though this post is about her keep taking care of yourself too